To want to scream at the misuse of reflexives?

[Whatisthisfuckery]

ARGH!

Where did it come from? Why do people do it? I’m pretty sure it’s a recent thing where people are writing such abominations as ‘please contact myself on...’ or ‘I’d just like to invite x and yourself to...’ No, if you call me ‘yourself’ I’m not coming.

Do people think it makes them’ sound formal or something?

My DS’s form tutor has done it every time she’s emailed me, then today on a video catch up she did it in speech. I’m not sure my face didn’t give me away. I’m sure I visibly cringed, I might have even put my head in my hands. There is no polite or acceptable way to tell your child’s teacher that her incorrect use of language makes you want to repeatedly bang your head against the wall in frustration.

It’s entirely ridiculous and irrational, but AIBU to want to curl up in a ball on the ground and rock backwards and forwards when somebody uses a reflexive where they shouldn’t?

@BrightYellowDaffodil

YANBU. An ex-colleague seemed to think it was more professional and formal. It made her sound like an idiot.

In fact, it made her sound like Arthur from Cabin Pressure: "In concluding, it’s been a privilege for ourselves to conduct yourselves through the in-flight experience today, and I do hope you’ll re-favour ourselves with the esteem of your forth-looking custom going forward"

Beat me to it, @BrightYellowDaffodil! I came here to post that very example.

I worked for someone in the 1980s who did this - I used to cringe every time. No possible cultural excuses.

It does seem to be more frequent now along with the double horror of "Myself and X went......"

@custardbear

It's annoying but I assume people are victims of grammar being badly taught at school

@Glitterblue - I hope you teach your child to receive as well as give 😉

No!!

It absolutely is NOT taught as part of the curriculum.

So it is teachers who should know better.

And once out in the world it is those who think they sound posh and formal when it's the opposite

You probably are being unreasonable but I am too - bloody hate this! My partner used a reflexive in an email the other day and I almost stopped loving him 😂. Mind you, I'm an apostrophe pedant so life's tough!

@StepOutOfLine if you want to have a go at a poster, rather than just quote their post, you can do an @ and it will bring up the list of names.

Can you point out the whataboutery in my post, please? Other than the actual word use?

[quote BobbinThreadbare123]@MasterBeth oh dear; touched a nerve have we?[/quote]
I see your pedantry about correct grammar doesn't extend to using correct punctuation?
Any reason?

@StepOutOfLine Got it. You're one of those.

You are my soul mate OP.

[quote BobbinThreadbare123]@StepOutOfLine Got it. You're one of those.[/quote]
You're the one sneering at people whose English isn't perfect.
I'm pointing out that people in glass houses should maybe look at their own, arguably, more serious errors before slagging off other people.
Muphry alive and well though, as ever on these threads.
And the unwritten rule of MN, since time immemorial, has been that it's deeply unpleasant to correct other people's mistakes, unless they're being sneery on a thread like this, in which case all bets are off.

It makes yourself sound like such a pompous twat that myself wants to deck yourself.

@StepOutOfLine but you haven't pointed out my errors, or responded to the question in my previous post. You haven't even thanked me for the tip about the @!

Have to agree with StepOut the haughtiness is palpable 😂 People always want to be snobby then make out like that’s not what they’re doing/it’s really just to help, so as not to be called out. You can know these things & not get bothered by whether other people always use them... Like someone else said further up the thread, congrats on learning the correct way to say something ☺️ it DOES make you very special

@Lanique

Totally agree. I mentioned this on a recent thread about crap grammar, in particular that of the 'trendy' variety (think gifted not given) and some smart arse poster seemed to think I was unreasonable.

You're right though - I call it Estate Agent Speak.

Estate Agent Speak is perfect term

Tricky one.Language is constantly evolving and changing. Who had previously heard " bubble" as a verb?

Get grates on me.....Can I get a latte? I don't know....can you?

@Lanique

Totally agree. I mentioned this on a recent thread about crap grammar, in particular that of the 'trendy' variety (think gifted not given) and some smart arse poster seemed to think I was unreasonable.

You're right though - I call it Estate Agent Speak.

And recruitment consultant speak...

@VettiyaIruken

It is irritating, yes.

As is misuse of I.

"X and I" is not always correct.

Not knowing when to use less and when to use fewer, although this is me being picky. 😁 It's not that big a deal, it just drives me nuts.

Oh lordy yes, less and fewer - drives me nuts!

Also using plural with collective nouns. If I read or hear 'the company are' one more time I really will scream out loud.

It feels like formality where there should be none - like calling your mum Mrs Smith. Add to the the annoyance of it being wrong and I find it very frustrating. It's weird how these tiny differences in tone matter.

And yes I find fake formality frustrating in call centre employees. I just try and remember if they are offshore that they are a) speaking a second language and/or b) speaking a different dialect from me. Because mostly it just feels patronising.

@randomer

Tricky one.Language is constantly evolving and changing. Who had previously heard " bubble" as a verb?

Get grates on me.....Can I get a latte? I don't know....can you?

The water bubbled.

Also using plural with collective nouns. If I read or hear 'the company are' one more time I really will scream out loud.

Perfectly correct. A collective noun like company or government can take either singular or plural.

David Crystal has an excellent paper on fewer/less for those genuinely interested.
As a descriptivist rather than a prescriptivist, he might not go down too well with some posters, but he is, arguably, the most eminent linguist we currently have. And a lovely man to boot.

I'm an English teacher. Some of my departmental colleagues do it. It makes me want to weep tears of rage. You are not alone.

Very often, the language constantly evolves argument is often brought out as a defence in these types of situations.
Where is the line line between evolving and misuse?
I swear I've never been the same since the OED said that literally and metaphorically were now interchangeable.

It’s anachronistic and pretentious.

"Language evolves, get over it"

@Glitterblue jamp isn‘t correct, but it should be!

Of course you’ll have to be consistent about it.

I run – I ran
I jump – I jamp
I bump my head – I bamp my head
I cut the cake – I cat the cake

@Ihopeyourcakeisshit

Very often, the language constantly evolves argument is often brought out as a defence in these types of situations. Where is the line line between evolving and misuse? I swear I've never been the same since the OED said that literally and metaphorically were now interchangeable.

The line is: how old am I? What did I learn at school and when did I learn it?

You probably consider any neologisms or other changes to language made before that and codified into your learning to be absolutely correct and immutable, and anyone insisting on archaic definitions to be an old fuddy-duddy.

But you will consider any new additions since you learned The Rules Of Language (there is no set of rules) to be aberrant and a lack of moral character.