Help - Pregnant or Menopause?

[Oneeata]

Advice/insight needed...
I'm 42, periods as regular as clockwork and I'm 10 days late. Have never used contraception for well over 15 years (withdrawal) I know, I know, I know it's not impossible and really need to take a test but it's just I suppose I'm just kind of in a not knowing/denial state of mind. I've had my usual pre period issues, felt crampy but no sore/achy boobs (which is my main symptom) I'm not stressed out out, have no health issues, have put a little weight on during lockdown - who hasn't 🤷🥰, only issue I'm having at the moment is broken sleep.
I haven't told DH I'm late (it's his birthday today anyway so don't think that would go down well as he blows out his candles) I just don't know if I'm too old to get pregnant or too young to be the start of Menopause. It's 24 years since my last pregnancy and I can't recall my early symptoms at all. Any kind words of encouragement or comfort appreciated 😌

Bonkers! Why wouldn't your DH get the snip? Surely 15 years of withdrawal is rubbish for both of you.

words of encouragement

Words of encouragement?! I can't believe that at 42 you have to be encouraged to get a test??!

IME, periods do start going a bit haywire as the menopause approaches, so it could be that. But obviously you need a test.

menopause usually starts with periods coming more, not less often.

I got pregnant in one go at 42. Get a test

Why are people shocked that the withdrawal method has worked for someone for so long? If it’s practised perfectly (has to be, obviously), then it DOES work. The problem with it is human nature - and getting caught up in the moment and perhaps not getting out in time. Or going for round two, with residual sperm left behind from the first go.

You need to take a test

You get 'escapees' before ejaculation though.

Hey op. It's not necessarily either. My periods stopped in my 20s for a number of months after I ran a marathon. I think periods can be affected by great physical or mental stress. Hope you are ok. Some shameful responses on here to a woman who is possibly extremely stressed out.

Obviously OP needs to take a test, but for all those posters saying menopause doesn't happen that suddenly, it can. My periods were regular and normal and then just stopped, two years ago, no hot flushes, no other symptoms. I'm older than OP, but every body is different and that's why no-one here can know what's going on with OP.

You need to take a test. Let us know how you get on. Sending hugs x

DH and I successfully used the withdrawal method for 6 years and planned both babies when it suited us.

I now use the coil as was having awful ovulation pains and honestly didn't want to risk a third pregnancy.

Withdrawal can work but the chances of failure are too high of an unwanted pregnancy. Fine if you're ambivalent to another pregnancy, foolish if you definitely don't want one.

Best start decorating the nursery op

Why are people shocked that the withdrawal method has worked for someone for so long?

I don't know that people are shocked. Sometimes people aren't mega fertile so it can work for them, but still, unless a couple gets their thrills from pulling out then it's an odd option to endure for 15 years. Not shocking, more somewhat frustrating compared to the alternatives. Plus, if people are mega fertile or unlucky then it is mad option, hence why it's simpler to have a blanket stance that withdrawal doesn't work. Until that became the stance, you'd get all the idiot blokes swearing they'd pull out and then the women getting stuck with the consequences. Which no doubt still goes on in some cases, so I wouldn't be trumpeting the benefits even it happens to work for you.

24 years since you last had a child and he didn’t get the snip? I don’t get it really. You’re just lucky to have got through 15 years without so much as a pregnancy scare really.

You need to test and he needs a vasectomy.

Have you taken a test yet OP? Dying to know!

Many a 40 yr old gets pregnant on the change as granny called it.
42 is quite young for menopause!

My bet would be pregnancy as you know withdrawal is not contraception at all.

@Pinkdelight3

Bonkers! Why wouldn't your DH get the snip? Surely 15 years of withdrawal is rubbish for both of you.

Insanity. Snip snip A father of 3 says. 2 yr wait on NHS but “ Change out of a grand” Privately.. he said “ But a baby is a lot more than a grand”

Wise words!

Seems very early for the menopause.

A dd had a ‘surprise’ baby at nearly 43 - just saying....

@GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER every female in my family has started menopause by 40.
So it's really not to early

I doubt the OP will come back and tell us due to how critical and unhelpful so many posters have been on her post!

If you are gettting regular periods, having sex and are not using contraception then you may very well be pregnant.

Get a first response test and go from there.

Statistically you are more likely to be pregnant than menopausal at 42 if you have been having unprotected sex and regular periods up to now. But only a test will tell you.

I think you are pregnant for sure - I know a fair few people who have had children in their early to middle 40s - you are definitely not too old!

@Newnameagain111

I doubt the OP will come back and tell us due to how critical and unhelpful so many posters have been on her post!

True! But not everyone, so please come back OP!