Would a little common decency have hurt?

[Weezapleeza]

My nephew lost control of his R/C car and it went into the road. A few seconds later a woman in a Discovery ran right over it but apparently without batting an eyelid. She didn't slow down or stop either before or after. It was like she'd just flattened it in passing. Then the acknowledgement came. A couple of minutes later she pulled up outside the drive, wound down her window, and asked him the most incredible question. "Did you enjoy that?" She was furious, and rude, and he was in tears. That seemed to give her an answer but all she did then was drive off again. No apology, nothing. AIBU to expect better?

If she didn't "slow down or stop either before or after" running it over, are you saying that she came back to speak to you? How did you end up having a conversation about it?

If her tyres had been damaged would you have offered to pay OP?

He’s not OPs child- why would she offer to pay?

@DdraigGoch

It would have been far more appropriate for her to say something like "you should be more careful" or "you could have caused an accident". "Did you enjoy that?" is a really weird thing to say.

Not really, if you think the kid did it deliberately because he thought it would be fun to scare her or cause her to swerve and have an accident.

For 12 years old the child should have known not to be playing next to the road.

For the age, it's easy for her to think it was done on purpose. Which makes her comment make sense. She feels she has taught him a lesson. Which I'm sure she has!

I would have been furious as the driver. I may have tried to swerve to avoid it thinking it may have been a cat or small dog. How on earth is she to know it was a rc car? Frankly it shouldnt be in the road, end of.

If you felt she had long enough to spot the car and slow down then your almost teenage nephew had enough time to put the car in reverse and get it out of her way.

He needs to toughen up if being asked if he enjoyed something made him cry!

@JackieWeaverIsTheAuthority

If her tyres had been damaged would you have offered to pay OP?

He’s not OPs child- why would she offer to pay?

Because she was supposed to be supervising him?

Lots of questions

I do drive. That's what I felt unsure as to the level to which a conscious decision was made. I did find myself wondering if she was on a phone or something. But I admit that I have no idea how it was for her and how much time she actually had or even if she made a very sound decision based on the actual road rules. I did work on the principle that she saw it and still quite deliberately ran it over while then just carrying on along regardless. That clearly wasn't true.

It did make quite a crunch. I can see that from both sides.

It was a bit of a while before she came back. I think she must have had time to think and get cross or think it through and then turn round. To be fair, maybe she was a bit nervous.

I guess there's the possibility that he did do it on purpose, in which case there's a lot of people he needs to answer to including me, as I bought the car.

I was upset because he was upset.

Maybe my supervision wasn't that special. It was more me being out there. But that's the bit that makes me think him doing it on purpose right in front of me is unlikely.

I did think she made quite an assumption. I totally see the problem with my own part nonetheless. If we had the time again, then I wouldn't allow this to happen at least not where I could stop it. As a driver I admit to being pretty unhappy about skateboards and stuff.

I kind of knew she had a point. I don't think I liked her making it.

Because she was supposed to be supervising him?

At 12 he is old enough to supervise his own fingers. Not sure how OP can be responsible for what he did.

She could have noticed it in the same way that drivers notice a football coming into the road depending on it's size and colour. I think her comment was uncalled for but you shouldn't have been letting your nephew play with it at the side of a road. They are meant to be played with in the park or on patios.

Who let him play with it by a road???

Do people not have 12 year olds with remote control cars you take them on the street .
This child wasn’t a 2 year old going down the motorway . Kids ride bikes , scooters and remote control cars and like the op said he lost control . So take his remote control license off him .

To say to someone did you enjoy that after you have run over it is a c*y thing to say .
She could of said anything like I didn’t see it , I nearly had a accident or you scared the crap out of me . Not did you enjoy that even if she thought he’d done it deliberately.

YABVVU.

@Bubbletube

Should never have been playing with a remote controlled car so near to the road - what if it had gone into the path of a cyclist?

Yes. Guilty.

Thanks to her your nephew has learned a valuable lesson.

I was imagining a 5/6yr old, and thought she was a bit mean and that it was a really odd thing to say. Totally reasonable to be a bit shaken up, and to have hit it tbh if it was a matter of seconds. But a 12yr old?! She obviously thought he did it on purpose for a laugh, and the 'did you enjoy that?' makes perfect sense now. She must have thought that he thought something 'funny' (to a 12yr old ) would happen, that age aren't exactly known for thinking things through, are they, it's exactly the sort of thing a 12yr old would do.

@JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows your mum is amazing!! That is exactly how things should have gone here - maybe not with cake baking, but still.

Why on earth was he playing with it close enough to go into a road?

I think DN should be grateful he didn't cause an accident.

Imagine if a cyclist, or a child on a bike was coming.

@JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows

Perhaps she was looking at the road, like drivers are supposed to, and didn't see a piddly little car go into the road.

I wouldn't apologise either for someone else's child losing control of their toy car so it went onto a public highway. I'd be more worried about my own car being damaged.

Me too. Your nephew is lucky it wasn’t a motorbike. That could easily have come a cropper and the rider been injured. The fault is entirely your nephew’s unfortunately.

Not sure why she felt the need to come back and be nasty.

@GrumpyHoonMain

The highway code says to run over any small objects and even animals to prevent swerving & causing an accident. She was probably terrified and furious when she approached you and you should have apologised for not supervising nephew better.

That. She didn't need to be quite so awful, but she absolutely should not have tried to avoid it. It's one of the main things that drivers are taught from day 1 of learning to drive. I've run over a small football in similar circumstances. I didn't stop to either apologise or rant though.

@JackieWeaverIsTheAuthority

Someone else made a mistake, you as a stranger are put at risk as a result, and you rectify the mistake they made that disadvantaged you. It's a perfect analogy.

😂 “it’s a perfect analogy” you do love yourself don’t you?

No I just think it's completely odd that anyone would feel a driver should replace a toy in this situation, love 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😹😹😹😹😹😹😹🙊🙊🙊🙊🙊🥴🦙🦙🦙🦙🦙😁😡😆😂

I think she genuinely thought he had sent the car out deliberately to give her a scare and make her swerve - which unfortunately is not at all unknown in children of that age - and she was asking whether he enjoyed trying to scare her.

Yep. Reading what she said again, I think that's the most likely situation.

A younger child, fair enough. But round here there are issues with young teens/preteens deliberately jumping out into the road to make cars break sharply, throwing stones, swerving bikes etc.
If what she saw was a stationary RC car in the road, she might well have assumed that he did it on purpose to make a car brake or swerve. Why would she think it was an accident, when he could have moved it out of the way?

Oh FFS- driving is stressful enough without having to deal with stupid kids toys being driven into the road. I'm sorry but your nephew is the one who should be apologising, it could have damaged her tyres which could have caused an accident. Its not difficult to keep toys away from the road and he was acting very irresponsibly. You dont play by a road FFS.

Not really, if you think the kid did it deliberately because he thought it would be fun to scare her or cause her to swerve and have an accident.

And what evidence did she have for this? Do people really go around thinking the worst of a child?

Some posters are comparing this with teenagers who jump out in front of cars.

This is nothing like that!

Even if the driver thought it was deliberate, she could have taken a few minutes to find it out & still been mannerly.

I'm really shocked at how many posters are justifying being horrible to a child 😠

Tbh, I don't blame her. It may have caused her to have accident. I think your nephew should have apologised, not her. Shouldn't be playing near the road that this can happen in the first place.