If you could go back in time, would you spend more or less on your wedding?

[IDKNABYBIF22]

Starting to plan our wedding and torn between potentially regretting not spending more on it in the future, or spending too much on it 🙈.

YABU = more
YANBU = less

Neither. We paid a relatively small and fair amount for the day we wanted.

I haven't had my wedding yet, but I've reduced it by over half of what we were going to spend. It was going to be a big wedding, but I never wanted that as I don't like being centre of attention in a big crowd and I've managed to change it by pointing out (a lot!) that we were going to essentially waste £16,000 on a wedding and honeymoon that could go towards a bigger house. And that if we didn't tone it down, having children would be pushed back several years until we can get a bigger house as ours is too small. Got my way in the end, smaller wedding for just the important people in our lives, not random family we only ever see at weddings or funerals, and much less money spent. 🙂

I can't vote because I'd do the same again. We spent about 7k all in and it was lovely.

I spent the bare min on my wedding. No regrets whatsoever. DH and I still happily married. Do what feels right for you though.

We did spend an additional 4k on the honeymoon which was incredible.

Mine was at a registry office, followed (literally) by breakfast (we had the choice of 9.30 am or not).
We hired a local church for the function. Decorated it ourselves with some bunting. Hired a face painter for a few hours and had a craft corner for kids.
Paid for a buffet, paid for a shed load of drinks, got a couple of friendly teens to serve drinks and tidy up a bit. DH did a playlist and we put that through the PA system. Had a ceileigh. Started in the afternoon, finished early evening, went home. DH bought some new togs and I wore a dress from Phase 8.
I think it helped that we actually planned it in only a few weeks, the longer you have to plan, the more you get sucked into it!

I should of said , ours cost just under £2, 000 18 years ago for around 100 people with us paying for a free bar for the first hour or so .

Neither. We spent a very unmumsnetty £15k on our wedding (inc honeymoon) and I don’t regret a single penny.
It was perfect, we had 85 guests, a beautiful venue, plenty of gorgeous food, a free bar and our friends and family still talk about what a great day it was.
10 days in Thailand luxury after - it was amazing!

We spent a lot but it was worth it. But I never want to do that again!

A bit more to hire someone to film it. That is my one regret. The only video footage is me walking down the aisle is from our friend’s ancient flip phone. It would be amazing to be able to sit down with our DCs and watch our video, see grandparents again.

Less!!

We spent £11k - it was an amazing day but 2 kids, a house that needs work and a mortgage later - I would love to have that money back in my account!

If I had my time again it would be a small registry office wedding. All the things that I remember from the day that still make me smile were lovely moments that cost nothing.

Wouldn't change anything about the honeymoon though.

We spent 18k and I don't regret that at all (it was all paid up front/no loans etc)
It was a beautiful venue & I had a beautiful dress. The whole day was beautiful.

You should only spend what you feel comfortable spending. We like luxury so that's what we chose.

@Babdoc

Mine cost £13.50. Which was the cost of a marriage licence in the 1980’s. So we couldn’t actually have spent less and still been legal! There was no reception or honeymoon as I was on call as a junior doctor on an 80 hour continuous shift. Neither DH or I wanted to get married but we needed the tax rebate as he’d written off our car.

Just out of interest, are you still happily married?

Ours cost around £8000 about 20 years ago, I'd spend the same again but would prioritise different things. I'd spend more on drinks, free bar up to a certain time for e.g. would have less people/smaller more intimate party and wouldn't bother with things like favours and fancy flowers.

Ours was about 6k, and the divorce so far is probably about 4k.
If I ever marry dp, it will be registry office with close family, and maybe a meal afterwards.

We spent £6k on our wedding, which included flights, a week’s accommodation in midtown New York and spending money for the trip. We paid an ‘elopement agency’ to file all the paperwork and permits and they provided an officiant and photographer for three hours. All we had to do was get our marriage licence from city hall the day before the ceremony.

We got married in Central Park, then travelled around getting photos taken in different locations. My hair and makeup was a bargain(!) $300 by a truly lovely woman who came to our hotel room at 7am on the day - everywhere else I looked charged $700+ as soon as the word ‘wedding’ was involved. DH’s suit was bought on sale from Ted Baker and my dress was a beautiful 50’s style lace one from ASOS bridal, and I used student discount

I think the steak dinner we had that evening cost more than our outfits

$10k I think ours cost. I would do everything exactly the same if I could. I'd love to actually. It was such a magical long weekend with friends and family.

I didn’t pay for mine but it was so expensive it makes my eyes water to think of it. That said it was perfect and I wouldn’t change anything, so arguably money well spent.

So so so much less!! I would do winter, smaller, less expensive, fewer people. I'd just about choose the same husband though...

The same. It was perfect. Maybe a little more for a better videographer. We spent alot, had everything that we wanted, absolutely best day of our lives so far

Just elaborate on my wedding.

it was in a stately home, but is was owned by the council so had a registry office in it, so lots of lovely photos in front of big windows, and staircases and gardens. So the marriage ceremony cost the price of the council registry office.

The wedding breakfast was at a very old lovely coaching Inn nearby, We had a sit down meal, I made my bouquet, and the flowers arrangements for the tables, which was simple as I did 1 big arrangement for the main table, and single white Rose's for the other tables.
Also did my own hair and make up. My mum and I had practiced with the hair style I a few times before the day.

After the meal, we invited other friends, acquaintances, Work colleagues to join us for celebratory drinks at the Inn.

We had a photographer but got him cheap as he was a friend. Otherwise wouldn't have bothered.

About the same.

Registry office with 35ish guests and then on to lunch in a small country hotel. Evening party for another 60 with buffet.

Paid for it all ourselves at the ages of 29/30.

Less. It was such a massive, elegant affair that it turned into the worst day of my life. So much effort into photos, food, random guest requests, my designer wedding dress etc. I'm an extrovert but I actually hated being the center of attention in such a way. And there was too much pressure. Way too much pressure.

Would have spent more on the photographer and on my outfit, nothing at the venue though!

More. Better location, proper DJ, better photographer, hired caterers so my parents didn't need to do so much.