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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

A situation (Possible TW)

113 replies

SoulofanAggron · 12/02/2021 00:47

This is a situation in a book I'm writing (Possibly a 'choose your own adventure.')

Don't pick at my writing style lol, I just want you to consider the situation, this is just a summary.

Several of you are trapped in a forest and don't seem to be able to find your way out. You've escaped from a cult. In general, you feel lost and like you can't escape/move on. Some of you have been here for years.

A woman approaches you and says she knows the most powerful ritual, which will free you. She leads you down into a crypt, which she says is her home.

She says if you have sex with a skeleton, you will be able to escape the forest.

Would you do it?

OP posts:
AnnLouiseB · 12/02/2021 06:16

Also having thought about it I have decided not to google dragon butter, despite my curiosity. I’m choosing to view this as an act of self-preservation.

dontgobaconmyheart · 12/02/2021 06:38

Surely if you 'have' to have sex with anything to escape worh your life it's coerced rape. Can't really see how it's at all appropriate, as well as being absolutely nonsense logistically and intellectually.

MechantGourmet · 12/02/2021 08:08

OMG people-
Never Google Dragon Butter!!

Or space docking

Or blue waffle!

@OnceUponAMidnightBeery are you NGDB?

Mellonsprite · 12/02/2021 08:22

I was a fool and googled dragon butter.
It’s too early in the morning to have to find it out boak 🤢

TheSockMonster · 12/02/2021 08:25

It’s a bit bonkers.

However I’m intrigued by the group of escaped cult members who’ve been living in the forest for years. Have they literally been living in a forest or is it a sort of literary device to symbolise a state of limbo (i.e. they’ve managed to escape only in body not mind).

I don’t think the skeleton works as (a) the logistics and absurdity of it pull you straight out of the story and (b) unless there has been a theme building up to it, the sexual element of the ritual seems gratuitous.

IndecentCakes · 12/02/2021 08:32

I actually want to read this now. Can you serialise it on MN? Grin

Isadora2007 · 12/02/2021 08:33

@MrMucker
“gouge out your eyeballs and skull-fuck you" is quite clear tbh. He will fuck then empty eye socket!!

To @SoulofanAggron please don’t waste any more time or energy on this “book”.

ParlezVousWronglais · 12/02/2021 08:34

Why is there a woman in the forest and wouldn’t they suspect she was part of the cult and just run away from her?

ParlezVousWronglais · 12/02/2021 08:36

Especially if she says come into my crypt and have sex with a skeleton.

I think I’d be saying righto, back to the cult we go.

MechantGourmet · 12/02/2021 08:39

"righto, righto..." Wait- is it a cult of diminutive miners?

MechantGourmet · 12/02/2021 08:40

Did this woman have straight, shiny black hair? [suspicious]

GreenlandTheMovie · 12/02/2021 08:43

I'd refuse, tell her she's a weird controlling maniac, and leave, possibly with the assistance of the sharp stick I'd already procured and hidden on my person for safety during my time in the forest.

Meanwhile, I'd have made a mental note of what she looked like and any clues that might help me escape. I'd also look fur any other useful evidence to assist in future prosecution, as the weird woman had committed at least one crime - either ireventing burial of a deceased person, or exhuming a body.

Once out, I'd hide and watch her home for visitirs, and follow them to find my way out of the forest.

IndecentCakes · 12/02/2021 08:45

Parlez, OP said the crypt is her home. She's probably got a mini-fridge and a wee Baby Belling down there or something; possibly also reliable internet and a Fetlife.com account given the skeleton-shag-situation.

MrMucker · 12/02/2021 09:50

Does the skeleton still have teeth?
I think that would matter to me...

yuhuh · 12/02/2021 09:54

@MeowPurrGrr

Sex with a skeleton might be difficult, would some boney fingering do?
boney fingering🤣🤣
HeyDemonsItsYaGirl · 12/02/2021 09:55

Some of these posters are going to feel silly when you win the Nobel prize for literature in a few years, OP.

SoulofanAggron · 12/02/2021 11:58

@1forAll74 A mixture of both men and women. I think Tinkerbell is right and men could just shag the pelvis.

If the skeleton were somehow transformed into someone the person hates /fears most (i.e old school teacher, abusive father etc) in their mind but in reality was just a skeleton, then it could add some suspense to who everyone would see and feel about doing it

@Marshmallow91 I realized another bit before I went to bed.

This is all loosely based on tantra/some schools of magick, where doing acts you consider taboo is supposed to somehow empower you. So...

You have to imagine the skeleton is the skeleton of your mother for it to work. If she's not dead, you have to imagine she's dead and these are her remains.

Is the skeleton sex part of the spell, or is the lady just weird? Do we each have to have sex with the skeleton, or just one of us? Why can't we find our way out if the forest, is like it a Blair Witch thing?

@steff13 The skeleton sex is most of the spell. It's power comes from doing something you'd usually consider taboo. Each one of them would have to do it.

@OnceUponAMidnightBeery I think a lot of the protagonists are a bit lost in life. Several of them (including the character played by the reader) have some mental or neurological abnormality.

Also @SoulofanAggron if the protagonist has escaped from a cult, they'd probably be extremely wary of performing 'rituals'.

@MechantGourmet A lot of ex-cult members keep some of the spiritual practices/'knowledge' they were involved with. They can even jump from cult to cult, due to the effect of what's happened to them, or because of whatever led them to join a cult in the first place.

It's black magic, innit?

@MechantGourmet Yep.

Why is there a crypt in the forest?

@NotMyWay I might change how they get to the body, making them meet the woman in a graveyard instead. The plot is based on a randomized list of unusual facial features, kinks, mental/neurological symptoms, and religions. Smile

Surely if you 'have' to have sex with anything to escape worh your life it's coerced rape.

@dontgobaconmyheart They're not dying in the forest, just a bit purposeless.

I actually want to read this now. Can you serialise it on MN?

@IndecentCakes It might be a bit disturbing for MN, but when I publish it I'll let you know. I hope to make it a 'choose your own adventure' style thing. It makes it harder work to plot.

To @SoulofanAggron please don’t waste any more time or energy on this “book”.

@Isadora2007 Filling out the random plot is amusing me. Smile

Did this woman have straight, shiny black hair?

Grin No. As well as some other distinctive features, she has Uncombable Hair Syndrome, so her hair is a straw-coloured nest.

the weird woman had committed at least one crime - either ireventing burial of a deceased person, or exhuming a body.

@GreenlandTheMovie She just lives there. I suppose if she shags the corpse it could be a crime in a lot of areas.

Some of these posters are going to feel silly when you win the Nobel prize for literature in a few years, OP.

@HeyDemonsItsYaGirl Thanks. 'They all laughed at Christopher Columbus when he said the world was round.' Grin

OP posts:
steff13 · 12/02/2021 20:17

Exactly how detailed do you plan to be with the skeleton sex? Because if it's graphic that is very off-putting. But if it isn't pretty descriptive then it seems like there's no point.

missrm · 12/02/2021 20:20

I'd lube that fucker up and go to town.

TheChip · 12/02/2021 20:22

@missrm 😂😂

SoulofanAggron · 12/02/2021 22:29

Hi, sorry, I didn't seem to get notifications.

@missrm How about with the added 'mum' aspect I mentioned above? Grin

OP posts:
missrm · 12/02/2021 22:42

@SoulofanAggron

Hi, sorry, I didn't seem to get notifications.

@missrm How about with the added 'mum' aspect I mentioned above? Grin

lololololo

No thank you.

Summerdayshaze · 12/02/2021 22:44

I think it would be more realistic with a werewolf or robot.

Cocomarine · 12/02/2021 22:45

@missrm

I'd lube that fucker up and go to town.
Christ that has made me convulse 🤣 Far more entertaining than the story. People read odd things.
Sheleg · 12/02/2021 23:03

The fact that you've put a trigger warning on this is ridiculous. Who would be triggered? People who've had sex with skeletons, which is a physical impossibility?? Madness.