Man being asked if they're pregnant??

[CC2021]

Had the covid vaccine and as a female, was asked if there is any chance I'm pregnant. Fair enough question I thought. But a male friend was asked too and the nurse told him "you can't be too careful these days". Umm what??

AIBU to think it's ridiculous to ask a MAN if they're pregnant?

Absolute madness

NHS staff have to be VERY careful these days.

Fwiw I wasn't at all criticising the nurse in question, more the idea that it's even necessary when, particularly in this instance, we were all asked on forms if we are pregnant so personally think the onus should be on the trans man to be honest on the form rather than on the nurse to have to ask an awkward question.

@Mockolate

Yes, but that doesn't stop trans men getting pregnant. Which is presumably why they asked. Even if they think "what a bloody stupid question" how hard is it to say "erm, what? No, I'm not."

It's important because it affects statistics and pregnancy is a protected characteristic. Men can't get pregnant so recording stats as 'only 5% of people who turned up were pregnant' is utterly meaningless if actually you mean 'only 10% of women who turned up were pregnant'.

Pregnancy is a condition that only affects women.

@CC2021

Fwiw I wasn't at all criticising the nurse in question, more the idea that it's even necessary when, particularly in this instance, we were all asked on forms if we are pregnant so personally think the onus should be on the trans man to be honest on the form rather than on the nurse to have to ask an awkward question.

Did you miss my post that approx 16% of adults of the UK are thought to be 'functionally illiterate'? I think every time I've filled in paperwork for the NHS (pre-op etc) then they've gone back over the form with me to double check.

I work in the NHS, I’m assuming she was joking tbh, we have to ask patients before procedures if they are pregnant and 9 times out of 10 when someone asks a man it is done as a joke.

On a separate, but related note, I wish we could have it clearly documented somewhere when a patient is trans or gay etc. From personal experience (as a lesbian) I’m sick to death of having to constantly explain why I’m not pregnant despite being sexually active and not using any contraception (have endo, so have had a lot of gynae appointments and procedures over the years), it would be easier for everyone if my sexuality was clearly documented somewhere, as it is actually relevant in some situations. I imagine it’s the same for trans people as well.

I imagine it’s the same for trans people as well.

There’s is no reason why a person would need their gender recorded. Sex is all that is needed.

@TwelvePaws

I imagine it’s the same for trans people as well.

There’s is no reason why a person would need their gender recorded. Sex is all that is needed.

Oh behave.

It's becoming very silly indeed.

unmarkedbythat

Why would a person need their gender recorded?

I am a bit confused as to why you posted this question? I think it's rather funny personally 😂 yes he could be tebas or she's just having a laugh. If it was me and my partner we would find rather funny

It’s ludicrous. I can’t believe a nurse asked this. Hope he told her “no, men can’t get pregnant”.

[quote CC2021]@JustAnotherBrick oh gosh, poor nurse! Must be tedious for them.[/quote]
I know. My father thought he was terribly witty but the poor woman had probably heard it from hundreds of 80+ year olds that day.

The stupid thing is mum nearly missed answering the question about being on blood thinners because dad was too busy focussing on the fact she’d been asked if she was pregnant.

Which I guess is an issue with asking stupid questions - people then don’t take the rest seriously.

Well if I am expecting to see a female and someone who appears to be a man walks in, it would save me the time of establishing that I do in fact have the correct patient and my notes aren’t incorrect if I would have just known beforehand they’re actually a trans male. Just like when I’m constantly asked and lectured about why I’m not on contraception if I’m not trying to get pregnant. Tbh it just gets exhausting having the same conversations and confusion from health professionals over and over again and having to “out” myself at every appointment. I imagine it’s similar for trans people. Don’t see why that would be an issue?

From personal experience (as a lesbian) I’m sick to death of having to constantly explain why I’m not pregnant despite being sexually active and not using any contraception (have endo, so have had a lot of gynae appointments and procedures over the years), it would be easier for everyone if my sexuality was clearly documented somewhere, as it is actually relevant in some situations. *

Whilst I get that must be enormously frustrating, being lesbian does not mean you can't be pregnant. Some lesbians chose to become pregnant via donor sperm. Some may be pregnant as a result of rape. They do need to check just in case.

Elsiebear90

Even more reason to just make it a requirement for sex to be recorded.
I don’t have a problem with sexuality being recorded if people want to answer that, I can see why it may change the medical advice you need. But gender, makes no difference to the medical advice someone is given, provided sex is recorded accurately.

They’re not asking me if I’m pregnant, that’s a fair question, they’re lecturing me about not being on contraception despite me being sexually active (a lot of my symptoms are related to sex, so it comes up a lot) and not trying to conceive and not even considering I could be in a relationship with a woman.

Just seen about being lectured about contraception- tbh, that really isn't on and you should not be having to answer that repeatedly. Mind you, nor should any adult woman!

@TwelvePaws but only having sex recorded and not whether someone is trans is going to constantly lead to confusion and questions if someone appears as the other sex. What’s the issue with having it on someone’s notes that they are trans? I’m not saying they should be listed as the opposite sex, as that causes a lot of issues in itself, just that it would make it easier for everyone involved if it was clear on their notes that they are trans.

not even considering I could be in a relationship with a woman.

That’s just wrong, obviously. I think it’s annoying that you’re expected to put up with that yet the medical profession is treading on eggshells about people’s gender.

@Lancrelady80 I don’t want to derail the thread, but I’ve honestly had some awful experiences over the years because of my gynae issues, most recent one was being told by a nurse that I don’t need to be tested for HPV or STDs despite having bleeding and abnormal cells because I’m a lesbian and lesbians can’t catch HPV or STDs (which is completely incorrect). Another one was having to explain to a gynaecologist how I was “having sex” if my partner is a woman.

Under recent legislation I thought it was illegal to put on someone's nhs notes that they were the previous gender. If they have legally changed gender and been issued a new birth certificate , then they can only be known as the new gender and not their sex at birth.

Note- I'm not suggesting that I'm agreeing with it, just asking the question as it's what I was told.

I work for the nhs and I also have to ask the pregnancy question as part of my clinical practice every time I see a patient, due to radiation and think it would be infinitely helpful to have the sex and gender, as I have to be able to exclude pregnancy.

@TwelvePaws I agree, maybe it’s for another thread, but I feel the whole LGBT movement is now solely focussed on trans and non binary issues while us lesbians are still facing discrimination due to our sexuality.

Elsiebear90

Where’s the confusion. Biological men or biological women have certain medical need. A persons own chosen gender really doesn’t change that.

*needs