To not appreciate OH parents coming round now?!

[mrshunterr]

I'm working 2-11 today MIL and FIL are going to view a house round the corner form us, so are popping in after. I'm going to be working upstairs all day so I won't see them anyway. But when OH goes to to pick DS up they will just be sat downstairs.

They are our support bubble and have the kids most weekends when we're both working. OH is running round like a headless chicken now because he's been sat on his phone all morning now his mummy and daddy are coming he wants the house spotless putting unnecessary stress on me as well.

AIBU? I feel like I'm being rude sitting up stairs but I can't just come down when I'm busy.

You are at work.

The end.

Repeat if necessary.

AT WORK.

Well if they are your childcare support bubble, they should only be there when the children are there and not socialising with the adults. THey'll have to wait outside until the children get home.

No, you wouldn’t be able to come home from work in normal times to entertain guests. Just because you’re at home doesn’t mean you’re available.

They can’t be in your support bubble. You can only have a bubble if you live alone (or with no other adults). So assuming your in laws and you and your husband live together then that’s not a support bubble

A childcare bubble is for the purpose of essential childcare only. Not popping in to socialise with the parents/grandparents

Could you not pop your head round the door, say ‘hiya, lovely to see you, I’m just working at the mo but help yourself to a cuppa’, and head back upstairs?

I thought it was only OK if actually looking after the children, so according to the rules they shouldn't be there anyway!

Also, when we were younger, I used to love it when PILs came over - it was the only time DH used to voluntarily clean and cook. His DM knew it too and used to give me a wry look. Miss that woman.

No, dont feel as though you're being rude. you are at work

Just let DH deal with it all. If they have to sit downstairs on their on, so be it

YABU

you can't expect them to be available when it suits you

and resent if they pop in when it doesn't and it doesn't affect you at all

@ShipshapeShore

I thought it was only OK if actually looking after the children, so according to the rules they shouldn't be there anyway!

what difference does it make if they are there at weekends anyway (or the OP is at theirs) if they pop in on Wednesday

what difference does it make if they are there at weekends anyway (or the OP is at theirs) if they pop in on Wednesday

Extra time in the same house increases risk. People who are related tend to talk to each other, hug, hand out refreshments etc when present in the same building, which increases risk.

The bubble arrangements are to help people out in difficult circumstances, they don't prevent covid from being transmitted, so contact should be kept to a minimum. They're not a support bubble and no childcare is being provided so they shouldn't be there. Plus the OP is working so the OP is no more available to see them than she would be if she was working elsewhere.

They shouldn’t be popping in at all. If they’re your childcare bubble they can have your kids while you’re not around. That’s not the same as popping round for a cuppa while you and DH are there.

Why don’t people understand the bloody rules?

So they liny babysit for you when it suits you. But you can't take a 5mns break to say hello and have brief chat?

How nice of you!

@Seeline

Well if they are your childcare support bubble, they should only be there when the children are there and not socialising with the adults. THey'll have to wait outside until the children get home.

Don’t be ridiculous.

Perfectly fine to stay at work, OP. You wouldn’t come home from your workplace to see them.

Yes my q is why are they even entering the house?

Honestly I do find it astounding the number of threads today about bubbles...

Oh op this is how one feels when they are generally such a nice person! You are working! You have a valid excuse. Just because your upstairs doesn't mean you can come down to entertain them. Am sure they'll be fine watching some tv whilst dh picks your child up. Say hello to them if you want, but sure to mention you need to go back up, very busy day. Surely dh would've already offered them tea etc, so just get back to work. Or don't come down at all. You are on important calls lol

I’m so confused with the risk now-who can have a support bubble!?

I do not understand how hard it seems for some people to read and understand the rules. In case anyone needs a refresher on childcare bubbles, they’re here:

www.gov.uk/guidance/making-a-childcare-bubble-with-another-household

In particular i draw attention to:

You can only use a childcare bubble for childcare. You cannot use a childcare bubble to mix with another household for other reasons

@EveryoneRevealsThemselves

I do not understand how hard it seems for some people to read and understand the rules. In case anyone needs a refresher on childcare bubbles, they’re here:

www.gov.uk/guidance/making-a-childcare-bubble-with-another-household

In particular i draw attention to:

You can only use a childcare bubble for childcare. You cannot use a childcare bubble to mix with another household for other reasons

So the virus is selective? It doesn’t transmit during childcare but it does when the same people are together for other reasons? With such complete lack of logic, no wonder people are just giving up.

Is a support bubble different to a childcare one?

Covid Police are out in force today 🙄
Just pop your head in and say a quick hello but explain your very busy. X No harm done!

And for those asking about “support” bubbles:
www.gov.uk/guidance/making-a-support-bubble-with-another-household

One of the main differences being you need to be the only adult in the household.

yes a support and a childcare bubble is different but this is a great example of the level of nonsense we have descended too. If they are spending significant time with the children for childcare reasons, probably at close quarters, as SD is unlikely, there is no materially significant increase in risk by popping in at another time - a year into this, its unreasonable to keep asking people not to see their immediate families. I took my parents some shopping earlier and stayed for a cup of tea. With the snow and everything else they see virtually no-one and can't get out much - an hour sat on the other side of their living room meant a great deal to them, and me, as a single parent WFH, and at this stage I could not get my knickers in a twist about the minutiae. There are other things than Covid to worry about.

@Howshouldibehave

Is a support bubble different to a childcare one?

Yes a support bubble is something an adult living alone can set up with another household to help with their mental well-being generally.

A childcare bubble is set up for the provision of informal childcare.

So the virus is selective? It doesn’t transmit during childcare but it does when the same people are together for other reasons? With such complete lack of logic, no wonder people are just giving up.

NO the virus is not selective which is why we should be keeping contacts to an absolute minimum. It can and will transmit during childcare, so if the child care isn't necessary, don't have the contact.