To have initially been mortified but now a bit annoyed by call from school?

[8bitgame]

I've named changed for this as it will be outing.

DS is 9. He is home schooling with lessons over Zoom.

This morning he had connection issues with Zoom - getting kicked out, camera freezing etc. I had to sign him back in a few times and he showed me that the video feed of his teacher kept freezing up and going very blocky. He commented that she looked like an 8 bit game - as in an old computer game where the graphics were pixel blocks.

About 30 minutes after his morning Zoom finished I get a call from the Head Teacher at the school. She is far from happy and it transpires that unbeknown to me DS had repeated his comment in the class discussion chat channel. He was saying he was having connection problems and then wrote "Miss X looks like an 8 bit game".

The teacher and then the Head have read this as him saying that Miss X looks like and 8 out of 10 and looks "a bit game".

I was mortified and explained this is of course not what he meant and that he was referring to the connection problems and the video feed being blocky and pixelated - like the graphics on an 8 bit game. Head was slightly mollified but still very stern and angry and I got a bit of a telling off. I apologised profusely and then had a chat with DS about not commenting on people's appearance and only using the group chat for stuff about work.

But now I've reflected I feel a bit put out as he hadn't really done anything wrong, he was commenting about his connection issues which were preventing him seeing the lesson and he's bloody 9 years old so who would read that in the way the school did??

AIBU to think it's a bit of a strange way to read that in that way and once they had the explanation maybe the tone could have changed a bit as he really hasn't done anything wrong?

I appreciate he could have found a better way to explain the connection issues and they might not be au fait with retro gaming but the only comms channel open to him was the chat feed he used and he's 9 so not always the best at explaining things.

When I told the Head he was having connection issues as were a lot of the class she said she didn't believe anyone else was (implying he was messing about and didn't have problems) WIBU to send a screenshot of the class discussion where several children were saying it had frozen and / or they had been kicked out and AIBU to think they've jumped to a bit of a conclusion here and gone a bit OTT especially by not backing down or changing the tone once it had been explained?

It feels like he's in a lot of trouble for something that is largely a misunderstanding on their part.

@SabrinaMorningstar

I'm laughing at the posters who think a teacher would have time to google alternative meanings in between running live lessons

It would have saved her a lot of time if she had, because I bet it took her quite a few minutes to report him, whereas googling '8 bit game' takes less than 30 seconds.

Maybe there's a reason why the teacher and HT jumped to those conclusions? They know the school, the class and the pupils.

Or maybe some of the other 9 yr olds asked their parents what it meant?

When you opt for typing the 'fun' comment rather than the accurate one, you leave yourself open to lots of different readers of different age groups, reading it and then reacting accordingly.

@AStudyinPink

But pixelated isn't the same as fuzzy?? So why would he describe it as being something it wasn't?

If he knows that he knows how to say pixelated. He - in my opinion - wanted to make a little joke at the teacher’s expense. Not a nasty joke, but nevertheless it’s not the time or the place, and he’s now been told.

But we don't know that he knows the word pixelated, he does know what 8 bit games look like. You are ascribing really bizarre motivations to the kid 🤨

@MistressoftheDarkSide - exactly that.

Blind sided by unexpected call from HT. Mortified they could have thought DS would have said that and that Miss X was upset. Hasty email apology and clariifcation of what an 8-bit game is with helpful pictures sent to clear DS's name from tiny deviant Sid James type back to normal 9 yo boy.

Then reflected, thought hang on a bloody minute that's a bit much and came on MN to find out if I was BU or not.

“If he knows that he knows how to say pixelated. He - in my opinion - wanted to make a little joke at the teacher’s expense.”

I don’t know OPs son, but I highly, highly doubt this is the case! It’s a proper stretch to see this as in any way inappropriate.

Imagine if the DC had mis-spelled pixelated and it had been interpreted as a reference to fairy folk? Whole other can of worms there.....

@8bitgame

I do get they might not have understood what an 8 bit game is but it's a bit of a leap to him rubbing his thighs and calling his teacher "a bit game" and rating her a solid 8.

Aaahhh OP I agree, mountain out of a molehill, very daft of them. Plus surely they realised "a bit game" is a very odd turn of phrase for a 9 year olds to use? Unless he's Sid James reincarnated

And this is reminding me of some of the bizarre things I was told off for in school, invariably just misunderstandings.

He spoke to her directly, using the chat function.

No he didn’t.

Yep, noticeably the people on here who are actually teachere are saying "Ummm,how is this inappropriate?" Some parents might be surprised to find that interactions between kids and teachers are not always 100% formal or serious. School would be bloody tedious for everyone if they were, frankly.

I agree he might have struggled for the right words, but even “I can’t see the teacher, it’s fuzzy” would have been better than a third person description to peers in public. It’s not the same as “You look...” (which at least has the benefit of being directly to the affected person) and it isn’t trying to be funny (which I think this was).

@AStudyinPink you are expecting an extraordinary level of social awareness and linguistic nuance from a 9 year old.

And at the same time, totally accepting the relatively low level of IT understanding from his adult teacher who made no effort to clarify the meaning of what he said before asking the Head to contact his mother.

Your expectations of a child seem to massively outstrip those of an adult in this case. Perhaps because you identify more with one than the other?

I don’t know OPs son, but I highly, highly doubt this is the case! It’s a proper stretch to see this as in any way inappropriate.

Maybe the OP can comment because I really think it was likely to be the case.

It could have been a lot worse if she'd had a filter on.

@GravityFalls

I am a teacher and I could not find a way to be offended by the comment "Miss looks like an 8 bit game" even if I tried VERY HARD.

I mean, it's not exactly a slur on my appearance, unless the amount of pixels I have is a source of personal pride to me.

As a matter of fact, I'm remote teaching using a shitty laptop so students do sometimes I say look pixellated. I tell them to deal with it! But it's not offensive to me. I also purposely put Minecraft backgrounds on for a bit of a laugh - in fact one told me I was about to be stung by a Minecraft bee - better get that insult written up!

And for all those po-faced people thinking school Teams/Zoom chats should be entirely businesslike and professional, both my classes' (sixth form) and my DC's (y2 and 5) are full of emojis, in-jokes, silly GIFs, and general back-and-forth - honestly it's sometimes the thing that keeps me going during the day. A bit of human contact. A laugh. Some silliness between people who know each other well. Don't we all need that now more than ever?

Yes! A voice of reason! Thank you so much, my faith in most teachers, and adults is restored! And yes, with everything going on in the world, thousands sick and dying and the NHS on its knees in some areas, of course some light entertainment is needed and should be mandatory for all!

If he knows that he knows how to say pixelated. He - in my opinion - wanted to make a little joke at the teacher’s expense.

Does anyone really think for one moment that a 9 year old child chatting with his friends stopped to think "Oh, she looks like an 8 bit game, should I say that or should I say pixellated, I probably should go for pixellated but no, I'll stick with 8 bit game because she'll think I'm scoring her looks at 8 out of 10 and that I am Terry Thomas reincarnated and saying that she's a bit game, Fnarr Fnarr."

Plus, "pixellated" is a well-known euphemism for being pissed. So the Head would probably have been incandescent with rage if he'd used that term.

I suspect the school now realise what silly arses they've been, but don't want to back down because it will make them look even more ridiculous.

They’ve been teaching so long that they’re adding missing punctuation (where, in fact, none was needed or intended).

Ridiculous.

@8bitgame

to clear DS's name from tiny deviant Sid James type back to normal 9 yo boy

This is going to be very funny to remind him of when he's old enough to understand the implications

No he didn’t.

Who did he speak to then?

And how else was he supposed to let the teacher know during lesson time?

Some parents might be surprised to find that interactions between kids and teachers are not always 100% formal or serious.

Indeed. Some teachers would be fine with this. But in this case the teacher isn’t, and the HT has made the rules clear in terms of how the chat should be used. I don’t think the OP’s DS meant any harm but I think he needs to understand how things can sometimes be one way in his mind (a very tiny joke) and another way in the mind of another person (disruptive or inappropriate). Because he’ll need that skill.

@Nith

If he knows that he knows how to say pixelated. He - in my opinion - wanted to make a little joke at the teacher’s expense.

Does anyone really think for one moment that a 9 year old child chatting with his friends stopped to think "Oh, she looks like an 8 bit game, should I say that or should I say pixellated, I probably should go for pixellated but no, I'll stick with 8 bit game because she'll think I'm scoring her looks at 8 out of 10 and that I am Terry Thomas reincarnated and saying that she's a bit game, Fnarr Fnarr."

Plus, "pixellated" is a well-known euphemism for being pissed. So the Head would probably have been incandescent with rage if he'd used that term.

😂

@AStudyinPink - no I don't think he was making a joke because I don't think he thought "looks like an 8 bit game" was anything other than a description of how Miss X was appearing on his screen.

If he was making a joke and hoping for laughs from his friends then he would have had the presence of mind to know it might get him in trouble and not make it directly to the subject of the joke herself.

He's not perfect but he's not an idiot (or a curiously out moded sex pest).

Why on earth would they misconstrue it that way? Says more about them than your son. I wouldn’t have apologised - not one little bit. They’re daft and obviously grew up in the 60’s/70’s.

Reminds me of the time an older nursery worker told me my then 3yo ds was “making a rude two fingered gesture” after puzzling over it for a moment I realised he was making the spider-web shooting gesture that Spider-Man does (he was really into him at the time). I explained to the woman she was mistaken, it was an innocent game and that sticking two fingers up is generally something people don’t do anymore - and certainly not in our household! I think she thought I was making excuses but i just had to laugh at her!

Who did he speak to then?

The OP can correct me but I think she said he spoke about the teacher, not to her, and I presume (again she can correct me) to his peers.

@AStudyinPink

But pixelated isn't the same as fuzzy?? So why would he describe it as being something it wasn't?

If he knows that he knows how to say pixelated. He - in my opinion - wanted to make a little joke at the teacher’s expense. Not a nasty joke, but nevertheless it’s not the time or the place, and he’s now been told.

I think you're on the wind up. If you're genuine, I thank my lucky stars you weren't my teacher. Or manager. Or client.