It's a Parking One

[ILoveFlumps]

Ok mumsnetters I need some ideas.
I popped out for 10 minutes this morning and come home to a random car on my driveway (outside my house). This is private property and allocated parking for a New Build. The Main Street it's off is permit parking only - this car has a permit.
The only place I can park is blocking it in causing a semi obstruction which I've done.
Police won't help as a civil matter.
Note has been left on the car by me telling them it's private property.
What else can I do?! Immediate neighbours have no idea whose car this is.

He shouldn't of parked on your drive.

No need to belittle him, but I can appreciate your frustration.

The fact that he is a carer and was visiting a patient is also irrelevant he should of parked legally and not on peoples property.

Totally shocked at the amount of people that think 'key workers' can park where they like due to KW status

This thread just gets worse.

He's now possibly 'clueless at work'.

Everyone was goading OP to deal firmly with the bad car's driver. And when she did exactly that, she gets crucified.

Hypocrites.

Anyone who even thinks 'cool points' can't be taken seriously!

I mean, what exactly is that?

@CuriousaboutSamphire

Anyone who even thinks 'cool points' can't be taken seriously!

I mean, what exactly is that?

Exactly! But people seem to be clamouring to be awed and amazed at OPs brilliant dressing down of the person on her drive. She’s now basking in the glory of mumsnet for having been actually quite nasty. Just because someone parks on your property it doesn’t give you the right to talk to them like that. It’s horrible.

@Gottalovesummer

Everyone was goading OP to deal firmly with the bad car's driver. And when she did exactly that, she gets crucified.

Hypocrites.

It's a parking thread. On MN. In AIBU topic.

You can't have a drama free outcome, people don't want that. They want to wave pom poms. A short 'Please don't park here again' wouldn't cut it.

@diddi I agree he shouldn't have parked there. But he apologised, he didn't deserve to be treated like a naughty child. If he had given grief instead of apologising it would have bern very different. If someone had spoken that way to me after I had apologised I certainly wouldn't be repeating their words back. Repulsive behaviour from the OP.

@CuriousaboutSamphire

But then, I have parents who were looked after by carers and fully appreciate their work and the needs of those who require their services. But then... I don't understand that!

Why does your parents having carers make your opinion better than mine, or OPs?

Person A parks on Person Bs drive. Person B gives Person A a stern telling off. Person A leaves, admonished.

All done, amusing tale for both A and B to tell!

My Mum has carers I am still Team OP

@Whammyyammy

He shouldn't of parked on your drive.

No need to belittle him, but I can appreciate your frustration.

The fact that he is a carer and was visiting a patient is also irrelevant he should of parked legally and not on peoples property.

Totally shocked at the amount of people that think 'key workers' can park where they like due to KW status

No one said key workers can park where they like. Not suggesting he shouldn’t be told not to park there again.

But personally I would think beyond “someone’s on my drive” and consider the person the key worker was caring for. Do I begrudge them getting their care in a timely manner than if the carer had to park further away? If I did begrudge that then I would simply ask the person not to park on my drive again. I wouldn’t dream of talking to someone in the way OP did.

Parking Guy, deserves everything he got.
Maybe he won't chance it again.
I watched someone park where he shouldn't once at a Bakery, they jacked his car up put it on bases with wheels, moved it too yellow lines and removed the bases, what was funny was passers by HELP push the car.
He got a ticket and came to the Bakery 🤣 screaming.
Do stupid things , get stupid rewards.

@CuriousaboutSamphire

Be a dick then To who? *@assiasi*

The shite parker?

The drive owner?

Or do we all just be nice and fully empathise with anyone and everyone who takes advantage of any situation?

If not, how do we know where to draw the line?

Who is the final arbiter?

The law, perhaps? Or do you have a guage for what parts of trespass are OK and which aren't?

Accepting the apology without the rest of it from OP sounds decent to me. I'll leave you to your philosophy and antagonism. 👋

We have a carer comes next door. She doesn’t care for them next door, but for their daughter at a different address. She always parks like an arsehole though. It’s really starting to piss me off.

@YetAnotherSpartacus

He was in tne wrong no doubt about that. He apologiaed, that is where it should have ended. Making him repeat back to you that he wouldn't do it again like a 5 year old was quite frankly out of order and humiliating for him. He had already apologised there was absolutely no need for you to act like that. Now if he had given you grief fair enough but he didn't, he was polite

Well said.

Depends on whether the OP thought his apology was genuine.

If she didn't & considered that they were merely a CF, then maybe treating someone like they are 5 is a perfectly valid way to treat them.

CFs are fair game.

OP, I think you answered him perfectly. 2 hours with 1 client is a very long time so I’m not sure he was actually with anyone in the first place! Well done you!

Totally shocked at the amount of people that think 'key workers' can park where they like due to KW status

I haven't seen anyone say that.

Oh so now he wasn't even with a client. Where was he then?

Have the Daily Mail picked this thread up yet? It's perfect for them.

He deserved everything thing he got. Unlike OP l would have reported him to his employer. Who the fuck does he think he is, dumping his car on other people’s drives?

assiasi so... You're still starting from the point of not acknowledging who the cause of the issue was!

You are still saying that, when inconvenienced, it behooves the person being inconvenienced to 'be nice'.

I just wondered if there was a limit to that?

Him: Err yeah, I’m really sorry
Me: But it’s my drive?
Him: yeah, I’m sorry

Great story, @ILoveFlumps and your interrogation of the young man was excellent!

It reminds me of the trail of male undergrads I deal with each year who do the wrong thing, but think that when I cal them on it, if they sheepishly apologise, I won't penalise them. They are hapless, and obviously used to women (particularly older women) excusing them, smoothing their way, and probably washing their faces and parting their hair for them. I don't.

It's blokey entitlement. Makes me wonder about how their mothers raised them, or - more importantly - what their fathers are like.

No one is saying OP needed to be nice, blocking him in so he had to make himself known and apologise was fine. Making him apologise repeatedly and call himself names was not.

@ArchieStar

OP, I think you answered him perfectly. 2 hours with 1 client is a very long time so I’m not sure he was actually with anyone in the first place! Well done you!

2 hours is not a long time to -

Get someone out of bed
Bath or shower them
Dry, apply topical medication, dressings and any catheters etc
Dress them
Administer medication, injections etc
Make them breakfast
Feed them breakfast
Wash up
Start laundry
Change bedding

It’s a hard job that takes time to do safely and effectively.

It's blokey entitlement.

No, it really isn't. Woman can act like entitled dicks too!

It's nearly always women who park across my drive on their school run, meaning I can't get my car out to go to work in a morning. Happens at least once a week.

And there we have the problem with society today.
If you do something wrong you have to own it.
If the person you wronged decides to tell you off you have no excuse , you choose to do this.
There are no circumstance that excuse this man, all the oh BUT people on here are wrong. You were right OP and you told him why and made him accountable for his actions.

@ILoveFlumps you handled that perfectly.

I think you handled it well, OP. He tried to cover his blatant CF by pretending he didn't realise it was a private drive, you haven't reported him to his employers or caused him trouble other than embarrassing him into promising to never do that again.

Cheeky thing won't risk it again in future, I'm sure.