To ask your most crippling put down from a child?

[PunkyPirate]

My daughter stuck her head in my crotch area this evening when we were sat in the sofa, sniffed deeply then went "Agghhhh... Mummma!! You stink! You need to remember to wash your foof!!!"

I was mortified!!! Admittedly, it was day 3/4 of wearing the same jeans! 🙈😂

I remember telling my Aunt she was plump when I was small. I had no idea what the word plump meant, but it caused a consternation. I also told my grandpa that my mum had said he was a snob when I was a toddler. Again I didn't know what it meant and she strongly denied it, but he probably knew she had really said it. (She had)

My jeans seem to lose shape after a wear or two so washing desags the knees and bum.
Also I would never get to day 4 without spilling something on myself

An advert came on TV for a programme featuring a tall slim, celebrity Mum and her child, DS turned to me and asked "Why isn't her body trashed like yours.

When my god daughter was a child she sidled up to her mum for a cuddle. Was at crotch height.
Gave her a cuddle then looked up and said “mummy your minky really stinks!”
Luckily I was the only other person there, my mate was mortified, I was howling!

[quote smoothchange]@WeatherwaxOn

Presumably people change their underwear and socks daily. Presumably they wash daily? How rank can they be?

Rank enough for the smell to register with their toddler. So presumably OP didn't wash or change underwear every day. [/quote]
I was more commenting on the suggestion that jeans shouldn't be worn more than once without washing...

Chatting with DD9 at the time about divorce.
DD: when did daddy move out
Me: Mm just over 3 years now.
DD: (whilst casually popping crisp into her mouth) Oh wow, 3 years and you haven't found found someone yet.
Me:

My friend’s child looked at my teeth and said ‘you have yellow teeth’. Then told me I need to brush my teeth and kept repeating I have yellow teeth.

They’re discoloured because I have a health issue. I use whitening toothpaste and try and convince myself they don’t look too bad but they clearly do.

Child I was nannying - ‘ it was a special event for little humans , you know. Children. Not people like you who didn’t grow...’

I’m comfortably over 5 ft but just don’t weigh very much!

@Awwlookatmybabyspider

You had the same jeans on for 3 or 4 days. No disrespect or hurt intended, but that’s grim and not to mention rank. It’s no wonder you were stinking. 🤮

Really? 🥴

When I was a rather shy 19-year-old student, my 12-year-old (female) cousin followed me into the common room and said quite loudly in front of all the other students: 'Ddl1, have you thought about marriage? Aren't you leaving it rather late?' And yes, we did get some stares, especially from the male students!

Same cousin, same subject, fortunately not in front of other people: 'Ddl1, I wish you would get married, because then you could have it off, and tell me what it's like, because my Mum won't!'

is everyone aware of Ubercorn - the animated unicorn from Go Jetters? DS1 once said to me, during an episode, when he'd done his three "funky facts": "Dad, you're just like Ubercorn."

"Really?" I replied. "Am I funky too?"

"No, not that," DS1 replied. "You only know a few things too."

Working in a school, playing role play in a pretend restaurant. One of the kids said I was a big, fat burger.

My mum when we were wild camping and on day 3 got too close to me and said I stunk.

You look young for a thousand years old mummy

@MissMarpleDarling

People wear the same jeans for 3 or 4 days? 😳

🤣 I just knew someone would be along to say something like that! Thing is okay, 3/4 days in a row is maybe a bit much, but then I read on a good washing guide kind of thing, that we over wash many of our clothing etc, and I'm sure it said every 6 weeks or 6 months for jeans?! And it has stuck in my head as I was thinking wtf?! I get it because denim is supposed to get better with wear, and the constant washing can start to ruin the material and distort the colour.

So how often do you wash jeans or rather jeggings?! I buy cheap ones as they aren't an item where by you find really expensive jeggings, I think the most expensive I bought was like from a department store, and some of the high street ones, if I keep washing they start to look terrible.
So this will be interesting 🤣

Howling at "get your shit together" 🤣

My niece was about 4 and followed me into my bedroom while I was looking for something. She looked around and in a very disapproving voice 'it's really not very nice in here is it?' I looked around and realised she was right. It was dingy and tatty and messy. It had got that way so slowly I hadn't noticed the deterioration. I was mortified but it was the kick start I needed to start cleaning, clearing and redecorating.

“ No offence Mummy but you’re not even a proper Dentist”. Said me by DD age 6. I am a Dental Hygienist .

While chatting to my eldest DGS who's 5 the other day on FaceTime he showed me the snowman he'd built. Chatted about his homework, gave me a tour of his bedroom ( they live quite away so not seen them since before lockdown... he looked a bit awkward before declaring 'nanny is it ok if we wind this call up now because we have been chatting for quite a long time??? ( 15 minutes) I really did have to 🤣🤣🤣

@tara66

Re. unwashed jeans etc - washing is a modern thing - most people didn't have running water until about 100 years ago (in the ''West'') so not much washing of anything. e.g. Queen Elizabeth 1 is said to have only bathed once or twice a year - but some how humanity survived.

This is not something to aspire to though is it??

@Awwlookatmybabyspider

You had the same jeans on for 3 or 4 days. No disrespect or hurt intended, but that’s grim and not to mention rank. It’s no wonder you were stinking. 🤮

I wear mine as long as there aren't any marks. So often for days at a time. Think that's pretty standard to be fair.

Denim is best when not newly washed.

DS aged three when I went to kiss him night night before going out to a party. "Mummy, you have got mess all over your face, now crying "wipe it off and put your jeans on so you look like my mummy". At which point babysitter rescued me and started showing him dinosaurs.

The Daily Fail have got hold of this now.
Fucking hell, standards have dropped when a story about a stinky minge get published 🙄🙄🙄.

Not TO me but my Mum still remembers (in her 70s) the time I told her she was like a mandrill because they had a big red bum and a big red face, and so did she!

(She had a rash on her buttocks, and was whinging about spots at the time, I was about 5)!

It's cooking smells that makes jeans and clothing stink. Even today, I made a chicken casserole and my jeans which I had just washed the day before, absolutely stink as do all my clothes that I had on.

"You don't really need plastic surgery, Mummy."
This wouldn't be so bad, except that I hadn't even considered any form of cosmetic surgery.
Until now.