Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

All of my family members forgot my DD 1st birthday

92 replies

HankMarvinjg · 04/02/2021 16:35

Am I being unreasonable to be a bit peed off and let down by the fact all of my family have forgotten my DD 1st birthday? Friends have remembered though. Literally nobody from my family have remembered. Big family too where birthdays have never been forgotten.

OP posts:
Blackdog19 · 04/02/2021 16:36

I’d be sad too. Happy Birthday mini HankMarvinjg

grey12 · 04/02/2021 16:49

Did you remind them? My mum keeps forgetting the day of one of my kids. But close to the day I'll talk about it and mention it. You didn't?

altiara · 04/02/2021 16:50

I’d be pissed off too.

newnameswhothis · 04/02/2021 16:51

YANBU I would be pissed off too

ServeTheServants · 04/02/2021 16:51

I’d be really sad. Cannot believe so many people have voted that YABU!

DownWhichOfLate · 04/02/2021 16:55

Shock. That’s terrible! Send them all a photo of her celebrating?

shitinmyhandsandclap · 04/02/2021 16:57

It's a bit shit but your baby won't know any different

Echobelly · 04/02/2021 16:57

I'd be a bit sad, but honestly I might need reminding of a niece or nephew's birthday the first time around, so it isn't necessarily awful (unless you had reminded them recently).

No one has the usual meet ups etc, especially for little one's parties when Zoom is not much good, so a lot of the circumstances that would normally remind our families is not about at the moment, so I'd try not to hold it against them.

ChocOrange1 · 04/02/2021 16:58

That's rubbish OP I'm so sorry. My baby was born in the first lockdown and none of DHs family sent anything, even a card. I know it was a lockdown but you can order cards from moonpig and have them delivered directly FGS.
One of his brother's wives then had a baby a few months later, we sent them a card and present and still no mention of our own baby.
This year I'll be sending round a wishlist a few weeks before so there won't be any excuse for "forgetting".
And no I'm not being rude or grabby, they all have children and we ALWAYS send cards and presents.

SpiderGwen · 04/02/2021 16:59

Did you remind them? I would be hurt too, but I would definitely remind them.

luxxlisbon · 04/02/2021 17:00

I would probably be disappointed if this happened, but do you speak to them regularly? I'm trying to imagine how the birthday didn't come up in conversation the week or two before when speaking to close family.

Original poster
HankMarvinjg · 04/02/2021 17:06

Thanks people, there's a family WhatsApp. Where it was brought up last week. People knew last week. I'm understanding about my 4 siblings not remembering to a point, but my parents were there basically at the birth.

OP posts:
ScrapThatThen · 04/02/2021 17:12

I can understand it not being in their diaries the first year but it being on WhatsApp last week, assuming that they read it, should have prompted them. Weird times but YANBU. Are you going to publicly shame and guilt them? I would.

TinyCake · 04/02/2021 17:12

Hmm.. seems odd. I'd be a bit annoyed. Have you heard from them today? If not you could phone and check they are ok and say you were just checking as you thought they might have wanted to have a zoom call for the birthday or something?

Moominmama5 · 04/02/2021 17:17

I’d be fuming disappointed too.Cake
I’d share a photo and see what they say. If it was me that had forgotten I’d be suggesting a family party post lockdown and sending apologies for my ‘undelivered ’ ( forgotten) gift.

Tal45 · 04/02/2021 17:22

Wow, it was mentioned last week and they still forgot. I'd be very upset at that.

TheRaccoon · 04/02/2021 17:23

I’d be sad about that too. Only thing I could suggest is that a lot of people have completely lost track of time at the moment?

Still, it’s not on. I’d probably send a message in the group chat celebrating and see what they say - I’d be mortified if I’d forgotten a niece or nephew’s birthday!

MackenCheese · 04/02/2021 17:25

Yes, Op. I remember my whole family forgot my dds 1st birthday and then made me feel worse for not reminding them! Anyway, they get reminders now, she's going to be 12 NEXT WEEK everybody!!!!!! 😁

Ingleduh · 04/02/2021 17:30

I know how you feel! It's always my kids who's birthday are forgotten, I always make the effort for the nieces and nephews and its infuriating.
I'd have to send a picture of her celebrating with a sarky caption along the lines of 'thanks for all the birthday messages and gifts Hmm'

happytoday73 · 04/02/2021 17:35

First birthdays are the ones I struggle with... Mainly because i transfer birthdays on calendar.. I don't always remember to add when new baby arrives...

But yes the fact you mentioned it last week would irritate me...
I'd definitely put celebration pictures on family WhatsApp... But probably tomorrow 🤔😉

LowlandLucky · 04/02/2021 17:36

I would be so bloody mad and they would bloody well know by the end of the day how disappointed i was . If they can make a song and dance about everyone else's birthday then they have no excuse for this. I would not buy another card for a single one of them. A baby's first birthday is a huge milestone, not for cake smashing but because the family can breathe a little easier knowing the little one is healthy.

sparkleandsunshine · 04/02/2021 17:43

I would be fuming, they all knew last week! No excuses, especially from the grandparents! I’d be expecting major apologies!

bloodyhairy · 04/02/2021 17:44

YANBU Thanks

katy1213 · 04/02/2021 17:45

I doubt I've ever remembered a first birthday. You could name, shame, hint and remind me all you like - but the only person who cares is its mother and she has a birthday of her own.

IloveFebruary · 04/02/2021 17:50

Given the reminder in the WhatsApp group YANBU. I would be upset too.

Swipe left for the next trending thread