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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

All of my family members forgot my DD 1st birthday

92 replies

HankMarvinjg · 04/02/2021 16:35

Am I being unreasonable to be a bit peed off and let down by the fact all of my family have forgotten my DD 1st birthday? Friends have remembered though. Literally nobody from my family have remembered. Big family too where birthdays have never been forgotten.

OP posts:
minipie · 04/02/2021 17:53

I can’t get too worked up about this tbh, a one year old has no concept of birthdays and won’t be upset by their birthday being forgotten.

If they forgot a 4 year old’s birthday that would be very different.

June628 · 04/02/2021 17:53

OP that’s awful :( I can’t believe people are voting YABU!
I hope your DD had a great birthday!

Irishgurl · 04/02/2021 17:55

Awful of them! The 1st birthday is a huge milestone for the parents too. Why would they not want to celebrate? Really mean!

Happy Birthday to your little one!

Lulu1919 · 04/02/2021 18:05

I'd be upset and angry !!!!!
But your baby doesn't know ...so that's one good thing
I hope you've had a lovely day xxxxxxx

SweetPetrichor · 04/02/2021 18:06

At one year old a baby is barely a person yet. They’re still in a useless spawn stage. They won’t know or care, and couldn’t give a hoot whether they have a gift or not. If they forget when the child is older, then I’d be angry.

Thedogscollar · 04/02/2021 18:08

I would be very hurt especially as you had mentioned it in your group chat earlier in the week.
I just cannot imagine a grandparent forgetting their grandchild's 1st birthday. It's a huge milestone and you would have thought they would have made a big fuss. I know I will when I become a grandparent.

Can't understand anyone thing YABU because you most definitely aren't.

NotFabulousDarling · 04/02/2021 18:11

YANBU.
Happy 1st birthday to your DD!
Cake Bear Star

smilingthroughgrittedteeth · 04/02/2021 18:15

My family (apart from my mum) forgot my daughters 4th Birthday yesterday and im pissed off about it so no your not being unreasonable. I dont care that they didntget her presents but a message or phonecall would have been appreciated.

user1493494961 · 04/02/2021 18:16

Happy 1st birthday little one.

MissMarpleDarling · 04/02/2021 18:16

I reminded my family via whatsapp that my sons is in 6 weeks so they have plenty of time to order online. I got a reply saying send links to what he wants. Sorted 🙈 teen stuff

MissMarpleDarling · 04/02/2021 18:17

Yanbu op I'll be annoyed of my family forgot

MissMarpleDarling · 04/02/2021 18:17

If my family forget**

MrsWhites · 04/02/2021 18:19

I would be very hurt too, especially since it was mentioned last week. I would share a photo of her celebrating her birthday on the family group. Why should you pretend you aren’t hurt.

Happy birthday to your DD from me!

Thedogscollar · 04/02/2021 18:21

@SweetPetrichor
Jesus really so a 1 year old is "barely a person" and is still in "a useless spawn stage"

Quite the child psychologist aren't you.

nanbread · 04/02/2021 18:25

Is she the first grandchild?

My DC are not the first grandchildren on either side and definitely play second fiddle to the first lot to arrive.

PatchworkElmer · 04/02/2021 18:27

I’d be hurt too!

Tigger001 · 04/02/2021 18:29

I would be upset if my brother, dad or my In laws forgot my sons birthday.

What have they said ?

Especially after only hearing about it again last week, I would not be happy at all.

Echobelly · 04/02/2021 18:39

OK, YANBU if you mentioned it last week, that is pretty piss-poor of them.

ktp100 · 04/02/2021 18:42

It's really shit that it was being discussed on the family whatsapp grp last week but nothing on her actual bday!

Is it today? Any chance your Mum or Dad have written the wrong day down on the calendar & then told all your siblings it's tomorrow or something?

If not and nothing turns up by the end of the weekend I wouldn't be speaking to any of them until they've realised and issued a sincere apology. A first birthday is such a lovely milestone, not for the little one but for parents and family. For them not to even send cards is disgraceful.

piglet81 · 04/02/2021 18:43

Oh, I’d have been really sad about that. I’m sorry OP Flowers. I hope you were able to celebrate anyway... I think first birthdays are more about the parents surviving the first year than the child (who’s blithely oblivious), so I do think they’re important.

ShirleyPhallus · 04/02/2021 18:43

I’d be so upset about this, will you say anything?

VinterKvinna · 04/02/2021 18:47

Oh that is sad but this is a very different year and please don't be too angry. They haven't had the chance to get to know your dd

stackemhigh · 04/02/2021 18:55

Well I wouldn't be wishing them happy birthday anymore.

ShirleyPhallus · 04/02/2021 19:08

@VinterKvinna

Oh that is sad but this is a very different year and please don't be too angry. They haven't had the chance to get to know your dd
Fuck that for a game of soldiers. I’ve got a DD born in lockdown and it’s been incredibly bloody hard without help. I would be very annoyed if my family said they hadn’t wished her a happy birthday because they “haven’t had the chance to get to know her”
Roselilly36 · 04/02/2021 19:12

How awful, why would OP, need to remind them? They are family. Totally inexcusable. Happy birthday to your little one OP, and I suppose the saying you can pick your friends, may be applicable.