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AIBU?

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Original poster

To remove dd from RS

473 replies

MossandRoy · 04/02/2021 10:39

The lack of balance is annoying. There is an assumption that there is a god. There is an assumption that everyone believes in that god. I can remove her. Has anyone done this successfully? I'm concerned she'll be given a hard time...

OP posts:
HugeAckmansWife · 04/02/2021 11:08

I'm an atheist RS teacher. How old is she and is it a church school? When I teach, I preface most topics with a reminder that we are learning about what religious people believe. So then I go on to speak, in the context of the lesson, that God did X or Y, but I might not interject every single sentence with "Muslims believe..." just because it's cumbersome. We also discuss WHY people do and don't believe. You can legally withdraw her yes, but perhaps the better option would be to balance what she is learning with a reminder that she is being taught what people believe, and that that is something for her to decide for herself - she may choose to believe for herself, and if she does, you would be just as wrong to tell her your belief as a fact.

Rhythmisadancer · 04/02/2021 11:21

how old? RS is a compulsory GCSE subject round here. DD enjoyed it last year when it was all about other religions, but in Sept started coming home furious that, in her view, the teacher was pushing a very "there is a god and you have to believe" message - but then she kept getting awards for her contributions in class. Natch when we spoke to him he has being deliberately provoking discussion, enjoying her contributions, and I think doing a brilliant job of getting her to 1. speak in class (quite a thing) 2. formulate her thoughts and arguments.
Her primary was pretty OTT re religion (it did say so on the tin), but in the end this has made her think it through more, and be aware of how other opinions interact.

mnahmnah · 04/02/2021 11:25

If it is a faith school, they can take this approach. If they are not a faith school, they can’t. RE is a distinct curriculum foundation subject, totally different to collective worship. It is learning about religion, philosophy, ethics, spirituality and allowing students to make up their own mind. This does not sound like RE. I would contact the head of the department (I am one and would be happy to discuss, before leaping to removing )

TeenMinusTests · 04/02/2021 11:26

DD's RE lessons have never had the assumption there is a god.

IEat · 04/02/2021 11:27

Girl at my school was removed from RE lessons except Christianity she just sat outside the classroom for the other religions. That was the 80s

HighSpecWhistle · 04/02/2021 11:30

Have you spoken to the teacher yet?

I think it sets a bad example to your child to just take them out without at least trying to find a solution first.

Sparklesocks · 04/02/2021 11:34

That's interesting, normally RS is supposed to be a bit more objective - more 'here are the major religions and what they're about' rather than 'you should believe X'.

Unanananana · 04/02/2021 11:35

My DD attends a Roman Catholic school we got into on distance criteria (I'm Wiccan, DD has no religion as yet). I'll take some religious learning for the best secondary education bar grammar school in this area. If you are happy with the school otherwise, I would just let her stay in class. What damage will it do?

The mantra I have for my DD is that she doesn't have to believe (enter religion here) but she must learn about it and respect it. A lot of her friends are Muslim/Hindu so she is well aware of differences.

Sirzy · 04/02/2021 11:37

So they only learn about Christianity in the lessons?

Angel2702 · 04/02/2021 11:39

I’m assuming it is a faith school, in which case they usually feature faith heavily across all aspects of school life not just RE.

Original poster
MossandRoy · 04/02/2021 11:41

Thanks for responding all. Not a faith school, no. She's Yr 7. Been annoyed at rs from about Yr 2. This morning's lesson particularly annoyed her. It was about a famous religious person who is idolised, but there was no balance to say that this person was also very unkind to those who didn't hold the same views, would only help 'believers'. We had a chat about it all and that prompted the conversation (again) about taking her out of the lessons. She has very much already decided for herself. 'You don't need a god to be a good person'

I can't disagree.

OP posts:
TeenMinusTests · 04/02/2021 11:45

But doing RE helps you to understand where people of faith are coming from.
It also develops into discussing issues such as euthanasia, war, etc and understanding different points of view and formulating your own opinions.

GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 04/02/2021 11:46

She’s right of course but learning about other people’s cultures and beliefs shows how to get along with others in a diverse country.

pointythings · 04/02/2021 11:47

Could this be down to an individual teacher? DD1 did RE and had a run in with her RE teacher in Yr8. Said teacher was an evangelical Christian who seemed to view the classroom as her personal recruiting ground. When DD during a class discussion argued (respectfully and in context) in favour of the non-existence of God, she was threatened with internal exclusion.

I had a quiet word with the head of department and it all went away. The teacher retired that school year.

GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 04/02/2021 11:47

Plus she can put her opposing views in class debates. An important role for herself and for others.

StoneofDestiny · 04/02/2021 11:49

You don't need a god to be a good person

No RE teacher would disagree with that! No school teacher would disagree with that,

RE is taught in a more balanced way than you seen to think. There is no indoctrination if the school is following the National Curriculum. Besides, views of how religious/non religious people behave is covered in history and PSE in various ways - things balance out across the curriculum in that respect. Shutting doors on one subject is far more likely to lead to a narrow minded person.

Sirzy · 04/02/2021 11:51

Why not start by asking them if you can see the curriculum they are following?

SusannahSophia · 04/02/2021 11:52

The RE teacher at the school where I work is an atheist. My DSes all took RE GCSE despite being atheists themselves as it’s actually a really interesting subject and helped them to understand other’s points of view. Learning about religions other than Christianity in a multicultural country like the UK can’t be a bad thing, IMO.

HibernatingTill2030 · 04/02/2021 11:52

If she is homeschooling I might be tempted to lurk around the screen for the RE lessons for a couple of lessons to see what is going on.
I wouldn't pull her as I think it is important to learn about the beliefs and practices of other faiths.

breatheslowandtrust · 04/02/2021 11:55

I'm quite surprised by the responses, I had some really he'll fire and brimstones RE teachers at school (in the 90s). I remember one newly qualified teacher slamming down the Quran in front of a Muslim girl and very aggressively telling her that her hy book wanted her (the teacher) dead. So no, they are not all pillars of tolerance and respect.

MaddeningtheUnhelpful · 04/02/2021 11:57

mine are in a faith school and I inform my children that they are being taught a one sided argument and I offer them the contrary information at home. I did however send a rather passive aggressive email last week when my 11 year olds geography lessons referenced that only God creating the Alps instead of any other geological events or processes. Confused

peanutbuttermilkshake · 04/02/2021 11:58

I can’t lie, I’d probably just tell my kids to passively sit through it knowing that they think it’s a load of shit in their head but also knowing that they shouldn’t go round forcing that opinion on anybody.

I found loads of stuff at school boring/pointless/wrong but still sat through it for the sake of education and learning and getting the grades at the end. It’s great that she’s forming an opinion and feels strongly about it and this is something you can explore together, looking into other religions and atheism etc. But I probably wouldn’t pull her out. Learning to listen to people you find insufferable and boring is a very useful life skill Grin

peak2021 · 04/02/2021 11:59

I would find out more first.

picklemewalnuts · 04/02/2021 12:02

Does she feel no need to understand the art and music that has arisen out of religion? Or the context within which other people live their lives?

Surely you can study what other people believe without getting irate? Wouldn't it be interesting to know the perspective some people are starting from?

To me that's like not doing geography because you don't need to know what it's like everywhere else.

HibernatingTill2030 · 04/02/2021 12:05

@MaddeningtheUnhelpful

mine are in a faith school and I inform my children that they are being taught a one sided argument and I offer them the contrary information at home. I did however send a rather passive aggressive email last week when my 11 year olds geography lessons referenced that only God creating the Alps instead of any other geological events or processes. Confused
This would piss me off more than anything. Is it a creationist-faith based school? I'd have to seriously consider removing my kids if they were teaching creationism in science-based lessons.