YANBU. All I can ask is this: can we, as a society, begin to recognise that alcohol is a poison - a poison that, were it to erupt on the scene today, would be banned as quickly, if not more quickly, than other drugs. Can we recognise that people who have an alcohol addiction are people whose brains are more susceptible to the poison, but that we all go through the same chemical release/stimulant/depressant cycles as everyone else? That while people with alcohol use disorder have a serious problem, that problem is waiting for anyone who uses alcohol? It's horrible to deal with anyone battling the alcohol demons, and yes, it is not your problem and you need to preserve yourself from it. But while distancing, please recognize that maybe alcohol is to blame, more than him, and that use of alcohol, however destructive, answers a short-term need. For whatever reason, he''s numbing something. Not your problem, not for you to resolve. He has to.I guess all I'm saying is that I really don't think people who abuse alcohol do so to deliberately ruin other lives. They do so to escape their own. It's very selfish but it is what it is, and while you are leaving him (which you should) you might want to (It's not your responsibility!) point him to things that might help him come to terms with himself.