To be annoyed by the Duchess of Cambridge's claim that home schooling is 'exhausting'

[Livingtothefull]

www.edp24.co.uk/news/kate-middleton-video-call-parents-homeschooling-challenges-pandemic-7080128

I accept that lockdown has had an impact on everyone to some extent, however privileged. But I can't help being irritated by this. Even if we accept that she is doing the home schooling herself without any help, I don't think there is any comparison between her situation and that of many other people. I am not saying lockdown isn't difficult for her.....but it is a million times harder if you are say a single parent, struggling with home schooling and a minimum wage job which you may lose any time, worried sick about your and DC future if this happens. And doing it in a poky flat instead of a vast country estate.

And I know she may be trying to show empathy with the rest of us. But TBH I would have much more respect for the royals if they would just acknowledge their privilege rather than claim common ground which just isn't there.

@Smncandles

Good analogy Rubicon.

One thing needs to be emphasised here and it has only been mentioned twice . Tax payers are paying for this

Tax payers are currently paying for quite a lot of people to be at home and not working. I guess they’re not allowed to be exhausted either. Furlough has completely trashed that argument.

I have an A in A-Level maths. Doesn't help me explain adding 2 to a 4 or 5 year old because in my mind it just is... Money was better but it's taken 2 weeks to get DC to "trust" that 1 hand with all fingers up is 5 so we don't have to count them 1 by 1 for every sum!

Phonics is totally alien to how I learned to read - we now have quick old school spelling out of words for "secret" Comms between adults and slower phonics spelling for DC.

I'm a SAHM in a secure position and homeschooling 1 DC while amusing a toddler is emotionally exhausting so can quite believe that the Duchess of Cambridge finds it tough.

@HikeForward

If you don't know how having a big house makes homeschooling easier than a flat, you haven't got much imagination. I've lived in both, and am so grateful not to be in a flat now. Less space means dad on a conference call has to share a room with one of the homeworking children, means the kids have cabin fever and no space, means your forever shushing them and can't do the indoor PE lesson or the downstairs neighbour will call your landlord again. Means nowhere to put things after muddy walks, means no bikes to get further out on your exercise sessions, means they're always next to the kitchen and complaining for more snacks, means 2 weeks of isolation is truly mindbending

I’ve lived in both too. I see your point about multiple kids crammed into a too-small space, lack of storage for outdoor things etc, but wouldn’t this have been a problem before lockdown too? Eg constantly shushing them because of neighbour downstairs, nowhere to put muddy things, proximity to the kitchen for homework, lack of bikes, not enough bedrooms; these are daily problems highlighted by lockdown not caused by it.

Space has its advantages but also means more cleaning, more chasing kids around trying to keep them in one place to monitor them, more going from room to room to check they’re working and haven’t slipped outside to play in the treehouse or muddy garden while you were on a call. It’s more expensive to heat, general running costs are higher, parents can’t risk losing their job(s) as they have bigger outgoings.

A SAHP could be just as exhausted as a parent juggling work with school. A mum in a 5-bed house with huge garden could be just as exhausted as a mum in a 1-bed flat.

Constant shushing is far far worse during lockdown - not only are your kids home all day, there's a much higher chance that your neighbour next door, or above, or below, is trying to work from home and hears everything. Proximity to the kitchen is far more of an issue when you're there (a) all day and (b) trying to get a 5 year old to focus on phonics, and lack of bikes or places for muddy things is much more of an issue now your only possible outing is yet another park walk, especially for those of us without cars.

Similarly, it is truly shocking to hear you suggest that well off parents 'can't risk losing their jobs due to higher outgoings'. You understand, right, that most people renting in this country spend a higher percentage of their salary on housing than those with mortgages? Do you think that and couple who can just afford a 2 bed flat for a family of 4 truly have lower outgoings, as a % of salary, than a well off family? And far fewer of those outgoings will be in any way optional or cancellable, it will be rent, utilities, council tax, food and bits and bobs for clothing, transport and the kids.

Clearly you've not got friends in small.flats on tight incomes right now, and it's been a long time since you were, if ever. Mumsnet really is like another world sometimes.

Seriously though, what answer could she have given? One that even half of the people would be happy with?

Just waiting for them to drive up in the Roller to a food bank queue to show they know about their struggle saying 'We are hungry too'.

I think lockdown probably is hard for them, it's hard for eveyone, and most kids will struggle with the dramatic change to their routine. All fine. But the remarks are totally tone deaf; clearly they are not in the same boat as most people and there's no point them pretending they are. They'd be better off either staying quiet or highlighting the struggles of other people.

No-one knows exactly how much help they have, how much they try and do stuff themselves etc
Well definitely security corps,nannies,cook,drivers,admin, housekeeping
Kate isn’t hunched over the Miele washing machine hoiking out the kids laundry or the sole carer to the kids

Space has its advantages but also means more cleaning, more chasing kids around trying to keep them in one place to monitor them, more going from room to room to check they’re working and haven’t slipped outside to play in the treehouse or muddy garden while you were on a call. It’s more expensive to heat, general running costs are higher, parents can’t risk losing their job(s) as they have bigger outgoings.

A SAHP could be just as exhausted as a parent juggling work with school. A mum in a 5-bed house with huge garden could be just as exhausted as a mum in a 1-bed flat.

Absolutely but with respect surely that is a comparison between households without staff. I have nothing against KM personally - she couldn't help falling in love with the future king - but once you have cleaners, nannies, cooks, gardeners, drivers and personal secretaries the daily burdens of life are lifted somewhat.

Vinyl - are you seriously comparing the temporary measure of furlough to the centuries of riches the monarchy has taken from the country ???
Think it through

YANBU

@VinylDetective Tax payers are currently paying for quite a lot of people to be at home and not working. I guess they’re not allowed to be exhausted either. Furlough has completely trashed that argument

except they're on 80% of salary and likely to be made redundant, so not quite the same. But yes, if I had a friend on furlough, with a degree-qualified full time live in nanny, AND older children at schools that provided live Zoom lessons for most of the day AND latest tech for them to use AND a large house with extensive grounds (with gardeners), AND a husband also at home and working part time at best AND all of this was somehow funded by taxpayers via the furlough scheme... Yes, I would be pretty put off if she claimed to find homeschooling 'exhausting'.

@Smncandles

Vinyl - are you seriously comparing the temporary measure of furlough to the centuries of riches the monarchy has taken from the country ??? Think it through

Both currently maintained by the tax payer, no?

Tax payers are currently paying for quite a lot of people to be at home and not working. I guess they’re not allowed to be exhausted either. Furlough has completely trashed that argument

🤣🤣🤣 absolute tosh.

No-one knows exactly how much help they have, how much they try and do stuff themselves etc

Well definitely security corps,nannies,cook,drivers,admin, housekeeping
............and gardeners, press and PR staff

Even without that excessive help there are two grown adult unemployed parents with 3 kids! They are hardly running a high school alone!

I'm glad you accept that the royals are maintained by the taxpayer .
The difference being that the furloughed are furloughed from real jobs , you know, the type with hours , a commute , and a boss . Also once furlough ends they may be thrown on to the tender mercies of universal credit .

Yes as soon as I posted I thought gardener, maintenance, PR, press

I'm glad you accept that the royals are maintained by the taxpayer

I’d be pretty stupid if I didn’t, given that it’s a fact.

To be 'furloughed' you have to have an actual job in the first place.

Every time a royal dies or is withdrawn from 'public roles', nothing changes. Anybody noticed anything change, any job undone, since Andrew was 'sacked'? What about Fergie? Philip? In fact anything vital being missed since the lot of them went into lockdown?

Nothing.
A bloody expensive nothing we are all paying for.

We are agreed on one thing then

@Frogsareawesome

Seriously though, what answer could she have given? One that even half of the people would be happy with?

Literally nothing.

Any negative emotion, tone deaf
Any positive emotion, smug
No comment, idiot
Does these kind of "jobs", just trying to justify their existence, scroungers
Doesn't do these kind of "jobs", why do they exist? Scroungers

If she went and got a job she'd be taking one off someone who needs it. If she volunteered she'd be doing it for attention.

What answer?
I speak from a position of privilege...try that for starters
Or don’t affect an I’m Exhausted I tell you..I'm just muddling through persona. When shes clearly not

I speak from a position of privilege... If she'd wrote that on her post it she'd have been accused of being stuck up and smug.

"Omg she was asked to give one word to describe homeschooling and instead she started going on about how privileged she is. She's so up herself. Why couldn't she just put tired or something"

They also don't have the worry that lockdown will negatively effect their children's future They will walk into any job they wish so if they never get the hang of fronted adverbials or can't write a good persuasive letter it really won't matter

Most of us have got through life without even knowing a fronted adverbial existed. I think there’s a good argument for all kids to repeat this lost year.

I know a very wealthy family who live in a stately home, their lockdown is very different to ours. Their three children have a tutor 5 days a week who is then replaced by an afternoon nanny. A house keeper, a swimming pool, tennis court, horses, acres of land to walk around. Her lockdown life is a million miles away from mine and they are not the future king and queen!