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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask for the worst CV's you've ever seen?!

620 replies

Isitgiroday · 29/01/2021 10:27

About to pimp my CV prior to a career change after almost a decade in the same industry - looking for tips and hints of what to avoid!

OP posts:
SchrodingersImmigrant · 31/01/2021 10:37

Yes, obviously 6 sentences is not very useful, but I've read people saying not to put any languages in which you have a basic level, but I'd disagree with that. While you can't work through that language, you have a base upon which to build, it shows that you made an effort to start learning and you might be able to understand emails in it, etc. So I include my basic language, but note my level.

If you can understand an email in taht language you obviously know it well enough, not just an absolute basic. Being able to read an email IS having a level when you can practically use the language, so I don't understand what your "but" was about here.

Gwenhwyfar · 31/01/2021 10:58

"Being able to read an email IS having a level when you can practically use the language, so I don't understand what your "but" was about here."

I could understand an email, but not every word, couldn't respond in that language, couldn't read a report in that language, so still a basic level. The advice I'd read was not to include any languages you weren't proficient in and that's what I disagree with.

SchrodingersImmigrant · 31/01/2021 11:05

Yoi should be able to somehow communicate in the language otherwise it has same value on a cv as the nursery mentioned above.

notafanoftheman · 31/01/2021 11:07

My family speaks an African language even though we’re white European. Putting it on CVs got a lower interview rate than not putting it, presumably because recruiters thought we were from an ethnic minority.

Gwenhwyfar · 31/01/2021 11:08

@SchrodingersImmigrant

Yoi should be able to somehow communicate in the language otherwise it has same value on a cv as the nursery mentioned above.
I disagree. In some jobs comprehension is important. There are people who understand quite a lot, but can't speak much themselves.
SchrodingersImmigrant · 31/01/2021 11:11

If cvs were based on skills one has "base to build on" and "show effort" people could claim probably 700 skills.
Project managing - read about it and once used something like gantt chart.
Budgets - read about it and tried it on my weekly shop
Negotiating skills - bargained with a shop seller on holiday
People management - did a course on open learn, managed it in 4 hours less than they said it takes
Legal knowledge - know where to find active legislation and was a jury

SchrodingersImmigrant · 31/01/2021 11:12

@notafanoftheman

My family speaks an African language even though we’re white European. Putting it on CVs got a lower interview rate than not putting it, presumably because recruiters thought we were from an ethnic minority.
Well that's shit! Honestly, that's horrible. I now wonder ehat would happen if I took my languages off, but my name pretty much gives me up
TammyTwoSwanson · 31/01/2021 11:12

A giant daisy drawn on a sheet of A4 with a different job/list of experience on each petal. Seriously!😂

DuesToTheDirt · 31/01/2021 11:13

A friend asked me to look over her CV. She had only had one job, in a bank for 10 years. The CV named the bank, but with no job title or job description - maybe she was district manager, maybe she cleaned or made the tea! On the other hand, she gave details of her primary school, including the full adress.

DuesToTheDirt · 31/01/2021 11:16

CVs with shoes sizes on are um, interesting (yes, really!)

Also, it sounds rather needy if you say, "If you can't get hold of me on my mobile, just try again, I'm probably busy but would love to talk to you. Or you can use my email or WhatsApp."

And in Indian CVs it seems to be common to list your parents' full names, your childrens', their occupations, whether or not they are deceased...

DuesToTheDirt · 31/01/2021 11:17

I have also come across a CV for a Nobel prize winner, which included the fact that he had streets named after him. Grin Not sure why such a person would need a CV!

SchrodingersImmigrant · 31/01/2021 11:18

@DuesToTheDirt

I have also come across a CV for a Nobel prize winner, which included the fact that he had streets named after him. Grin Not sure why such a person would need a CV!
I would absolutely have this on a cv if I had street named after me😁 Wow
GuyFawkesDay · 31/01/2021 11:20

In my recruiting days I got an email from a potential candidate:

Hi,

Here is my CV 4 U.

Needless to say, I pressed delete before opening it.

DuesToTheDirt · 31/01/2021 11:52

If you have an established career then focus on the key roles that apply to the job advert, an employer isn't going to care about your o-level grades back in '78.

I had a company get back to me to request my A level grades from 25 years earlier. I'd left them off my CV given that I had a PhD... My A levels were obviously considered sub-par as they didn't take it any further Confused.

SchrodingersImmigrant · 31/01/2021 11:57

@DuesToTheDirt

If you have an established career then focus on the key roles that apply to the job advert, an employer isn't going to care about your o-level grades back in '78.

I had a company get back to me to request my A level grades from 25 years earlier. I'd left them off my CV given that I had a PhD... My A levels were obviously considered sub-par as they didn't take it any further Confused.

This is ridiculous and it bugged me in grad recruitment too. Who cares whether your alevels were bbc, if you graduated with first or higher 2:1🤷🏻 no one should. Ir gcse! It's ridiculous
Gwenhwyfar · 31/01/2021 13:15

@DuesToTheDirt

I have also come across a CV for a Nobel prize winner, which included the fact that he had streets named after him. Grin Not sure why such a person would need a CV!
Probably more like a bio they use when they go to conferences. And yes, I'd tell everyone too if I had a street!
Gwenhwyfar · 31/01/2021 13:16

@DuesToTheDirt

If you have an established career then focus on the key roles that apply to the job advert, an employer isn't going to care about your o-level grades back in '78.

I had a company get back to me to request my A level grades from 25 years earlier. I'd left them off my CV given that I had a PhD... My A levels were obviously considered sub-par as they didn't take it any further Confused.

Ha ha. See my post above about the person with higher education, already working in an organisation who had to send off for new GCSE certificates.
GreenlandTheMovie · 31/01/2021 13:20

@TammyTwoSwanson

A giant daisy drawn on a sheet of A4 with a different job/list of experience on each petal. Seriously!😂
Wow! Thats too good not to share what field of job it was for. An artist of some sort, surely?
WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 31/01/2021 13:47

I would absolutely have this on a cv if I had street named after me😁 Wow

Cheap deed poll, change your name to Amanda High, Bosssshhhh Grin

Gwenhwyfar · 31/01/2021 13:48

"Wow! Thats too good not to share what field of job it was for. An artist of some sort, surely?"

What field lol.

Snoringmutt · 31/01/2021 13:55

The advice I'd read was not to include any languages you weren't proficient in and that's what I disagree with.
Depends what industry you're in and how important accuracy is in that industry - you don't have to follow advice you know - people are only trying to help and every industry is different.

I'm sure some recruiters have loads of time and just love reading all about your very exciting interests and every detail of your life in 5 pages of a CVs and 5 pages of a covering letter. But after reading a few hundred I for one quickly tire of reading waffle...here's the important bit - it's not a trap - I want the skills I've asked for, we've thought very carefully about this - if I've asked for languages - great - if I haven't, I don't want to know, it won't many any difference to your chances of getting the job.
If I ask you about your hobbies at the beginning of an interview - that's to help you relax - not because your hobbies and interests might help you get the job, regardless of how interesting they are - it's just small talk.
While I'm at it - an interviewee sending a note after an interview to thank the interviewers for their time and to express how much they enjoyed learning about the role blah blah blah - will always make you stand out in a good way.

KimMarie34 · 31/01/2021 14:09

My husband once had an applicant send over the wrong attachment in place of his covering letter. I’m not sure how he managed it, but it was a naked woman.

Gwenhwyfar · 31/01/2021 14:15

"The advice I'd read was not to include any languages you weren't proficient in and that's what I disagree with.
Depends what industry you're in and how important accuracy is in that industry - you don't have to follow advice you know - people are only trying to help and every industry is different."

I don't follow all the advice. That was exactly my point.

"While I'm at it - an interviewee sending a note after an interview to thank the interviewers for their time and to express how much they enjoyed learning about the role blah blah blah - will always make you stand out in a good way"

Whereas other recruiters here have said not to do that. Just goes to show that people are different.

queenofthelamas · 31/01/2021 14:20

All the CV said was 'please cal for further details'......

Gwenhwyfar · 31/01/2021 16:24

@queenofthelamas

All the CV said was 'please cal for further details'......
I think that's great. Makes up for all the employers who put an ad online, but make you call for the details.
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