Neighbour behaviour

[Stars90]

Name changed for this.

AIBU think this is odd behaviour...

I have very friendly neighbours, all of which I’d say are ‘too friendly’ there’s a couple imperticular which come across as too in your face.
Ie, messaging everyday, asking to come over at least 4 times a week not considering lockdown neither, in the last 6 months they have gone out of their way to get a bigger car more or less a mini bus for ‘day trips’ with us, this has never been spoke about just assumed, they also have cameras pointing directly onto our property, in a safety manor we agreed this was ok at the beginning, but I’ve noticed the camera now pointing more to our window rather than front of the property.
A comment was made the other day, how they claim to have access to our secure internet done through some software they have access too and checking what we have been doing and who we were speaking to, since this comment has been made I feel very uncomfortable and I feel this is very strange, why would they want to be on our wifi when they have their own, why would they want to be watching what we do?
I don’t see these neighbours at all as a threat, their a married couple in their late 40s with children. Ranging from 6-18

I’ve mentioned this to my friend about the situation and she has stated she has a good neighbourly friendship with her neighbour, socially speaking in passing or seeing each other in the garden doing washing ect, but nothing to this extent. Am I being unreasonable to feel concerned about this behaviour? It’s not something I’ve experienced before

Omg , totally ott, very weird and disturbing

That’s really strange and incredibly creepy particularly the internet thing and camera thing. I’m completely confused about the car thing too; why on earth would they do that. Do you think of them as friends?

What did you say when they told you they were tracking their WiFi? Why on earth are you allowing them to point cameras at your property.
Tell them to remove the cameras, stop making weird comments about your internet and to back off.

Very odd. I wouldn’t like it. I’d avoid them as much as possible, and make sure my wifi was secure.

Why would you put up with this?

Change your router code so they can't access your broadband.

Ask them very firmly to move the cameras away from your house immediately. If they haven't done that within 24 hours, ask them again and say you will be contacting a solicitor if they don't.

Refuse any trips out or socialising.

Don't answer messages they send.

Keep your distance from them.

How on earth did it get to this point?

At what point in any conversation have you said "Say what now? You did what?"

You need to find your backbone and show them how many paces back the line was!

I can't believe you even have to ask. They sound absolutely mental. They said they've accessed your internet and are tracking your conversations? If they genuinely did this it's illeagal and if they made it up it's still insane.

We see the as friends yes, but now I’m becoming to the point where I feel it’s all too much.
I rang my provider regarding internet and put a ban on other devices other than the ones we are aware of, I have changed passwords too.
I have mentioned the camera before hand, I was told this wasn’t aimed at our window, although it is.
I don’t understand the car thing neither, I did make a few questions asking why would they do that, prices for a bigger vehicle for neighbours wouldn’t be something I would consider 😳

A comment was made the other day, how they claim to have access to our secure internet done through some software they have access too and checking what we have been doing and who we were speaking to

What the actual fuck am I reading?! You didn't immediately go mental on them why? FFS these nutters are spying on you. I would text them, telling them to stop all of this behaviour, the cameras, the monitoring, everything, right now. This way you can have their acknowledgment in writing. I would then be going to the police. This is so far beyond normal it's unbelievable. How you don't see these people as a threat is very alarming.

I have mentioned the camera before hand, I was told this wasn’t aimed at our window, although it is

"It IS aimed at our window and I want it moved immediately. This 'relationship' between us is making us very uncomfortable, we will not be going out for outings with you. We are just neighbours not friends"

Having said that above, I presume you did allow a friendship between you and it's got out of hand

I'm friendly with two sets of NDNs, we go to our local pub on a Friday and have meals together pre covid. However, I'd only have to encounter one of the things you mention and I would be backing off straightaway

@Aquamarine1029 - in general I don’t find them a threat, however the behaviour seems very strange and is making me uncomfortable.

@Roussette - I have sent them a message regarding all the reasons, they just seem to sugar coat it and make out it isn’t as bad as it is. Ie, cameras are for protection of the street, outings are a nice idea, they also have said the wifi was a ‘joke’, a joke or not it’s uncomfortable and I doubt I would ever know if this was serious or a ‘joke’, my mother has become very wary of these neighbours since the camera, she’s our support bubble and they questioned a few months ago why my mother was allowed to come around and they weren’t, as we stated we ain’t allowing visitors due to the virus

They sound tone deaf, stupid and pushy. With people like this you need to look them in the eye and say things like... to us it isn't a joke, you are making us very uncomfortable indeed. Then say that the cameras are an infringement on your privacy and you want them aimed on the road and not your house immediately.

With some people you have to spell it out and be forceful

Read up on the use of domestic cctv and cameras. They cannot point a camera at your window change all your passwords and block them on your phone.

You must have far looser boundaries than I do, but if I had neighbours monitoring me and my home to this extent, I would very much perceive it as a threat to my privacy and security.

Definitely weird and I would be going nuts.

I would raise the camera issue and just say - I don't mind the camera covering my drive (or whatever you are happy with) but you said it wasn't pointing at the house, and I'm afraid it is. Therefore you need to adjust it.

The Internet thing I'd have asked wtf have them the right. But definitely change passwords.

You need to get a backbone!

If you know it is pointing at your property then demand it is moved.

Are you for real?

Thank you. I think I will have to be more firm and possibly quite harsh as they don’t seem to realise it’s a issue

CCTV problem could be easily resolved.

Post them, recorded delivery, an SAR about their CCTV recording. Send them a copy of the ICO regulations...

ico.org.uk/your-data-matters/domestic-cctv-systems-guidance-for-people-using-cctv/

How did they gain access to your secure network without a password?

Really creepy behaviour from them...I'd move house...unless that's what they wanted me to do....total invasion of privacy...I'd keep my distance...

Move house? When the OP hasn't even tried to tell them to stop these things?
I'm buggered if I would!

Change your mobile phone number and passwords - you don’t need to tell them this. Tell them they have 24 hours to remove their cameras from pointing anywhere near your windows or doors or you reserve the right to take legal and police action to protect your privacy, don’t ask just say - we have become increasingly concerned that our privacy is being compromised. Just repeat over abs over - no discussion

Such weirdos, I would demand they remove the cameras from facing your windows.

Anyone can see that's not normal.

Re the internet, speak to the police.
I would be concerned for their kids too with parents like that.

So not normal for anyone to do that.
Please stop being a pushover and do something.