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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask what you think of Feminism? (Pic included)

111 replies

Newfor2021 · 23/01/2021 02:15

After viewing this image.

I suddenly feel conflicted about whether I’m a feminist or not!

YABU - go earn your money!
YANBU - family first

To ask what you think of Feminism? (Pic included)
OP posts:
relaxtakeiteasyeatcheese · 23/01/2021 06:51

To me that picture isn't offensive. It does have a bit of truth to it.

Shoxfordian · 23/01/2021 07:21

Picture is stupid op
Not what feminism is about

YetAnotherSpartacus · 23/01/2021 07:24

YABU - go earn your money!
YANBU - family first

How nice of men to give us a choice! Biscuit

speakout · 23/01/2021 07:31

*YABU - go earn your money!
YANBU - family first

How nice of men to give us a choice! *

I agree.

Surely earning money is putting your family first, my family is rather fond of eating food and having a warm house.

GCAcademic · 23/01/2021 07:36

I would also like to know where that image comes from. It has distinct MRA qualities, and the OP’s question seems very disingenuous.

whatswithtodaytoday · 23/01/2021 07:40

I get paid to work. I do not get paid to cook or do housework. Getting paid gives me the freedom to make my own decisions about my life - if I wanted to leave my partner I could afford to live alone.

Thankfully my partner is also a feminist and doesn't see me as a household servant - he does his fair share of everything.

OhWhyNot · 23/01/2021 07:41

You feel conflicted over the strive for women being equal to men

ok then Hmm

CrotchBurn · 23/01/2021 07:48

If the only reason you have a roof over your head is because a man pays for it - it's not feminism

KizzyWayfarer · 23/01/2021 07:54

The word “serve” does rather give it away. I suspect the creator of the meme is a religious, probably American, right-winger who thinks the natural hierarchy is husband serves God, woman serves husband and God forbid women earn their own money and get uppity.

speakout · 23/01/2021 08:09

If the only reason you have a roof over your head is because a man pays for it - it's not feminism

Rubbish.

I jacked in my career to become a SAHM. It was the best decision for us as a family.

CrotchBurn · 23/01/2021 08:17

@speakout
An opinion isnt rubbish because you disagree with it.

If you are financially dependent on a man, you should be worried.

MedusasBadHairDay · 23/01/2021 08:17

OP there are lots of books out there about feminism, written by feminists, maybe try reading those instead of relying on MRA memes for your info.

PearlescentIridescent · 23/01/2021 08:17

This piece of crap honestly made you feel conflicted about the whole concept of feminism???

It is incredibly reductive. The point of feminism is that women have a choice, that they are not bound to the homes of husbands without freedom or agency over their lives. I hate the notion that motherhood and especially stay at home motherhood is somehow incompatible with feminism. It's an idea I had when I was 20 and very quickly grew out of. I was so sad when I had a child young and thought I now couldn't be a feminist. That feeling lasted for about 5 minutes!

I understand the drawbacks of stay at home motherhood, but that is not even what the poster is saying. It's just yet another propaganda piece to push female guilt. We can never do anything right can we?

I would love to be a SAHM and am still very much a feminist. The reality is I also want to build a strong career and provide for my family. Because of what feminism has built, the burden of that choice actually falls to me, and I am eternally grateful for that.

PearlescentIridescent · 23/01/2021 08:19

@KizzyWayfarer scary how many of those people there are in the world, and how it's infiltrated the UK.

Had a fallout with a friend over this. He actually said to me he didn't think women wanted to work at all Confused Who is "women"?? Was so shocked.

TheQueenRaven · 23/01/2021 08:21

I've not voted but for me feminism is about giving women choices. If some of us choose to stay home with our children we shouldn't be denigrated (sadly that happens on the MN FWR board).

An0n0n0n · 23/01/2021 08:29

FEMINISM

IS THE IDEA THAT WOMEN ARE FREE TO GO OUT TO WORK AND EXPECT THEIR HUSBAND TO DO 50% OF EVERYTHING ELSE THAT THEY DO AT HOME.

Because men don't 'give women babies'
Because men don't 'help' at home
Because men that act like useless twats dragging their feet about getting up to look after their own child because they're tired after staying up late to play the Xbox on 'their time off', are in no place to treat women equally at work.

An0n0n0n · 23/01/2021 08:33

And if you take 'a man' out of the picture then she's either a lazy benefit scrounger or would have been better not having kids if she has to palm them off on other people to go out to work Hmm

Sometimesonly · 23/01/2021 08:33

Picture is stupid op
Not what feminism is about

Was going to write a long response but it all boils down to this basically!

PrawnofthePatriarchy · 23/01/2021 08:37

That image....

*Surely earning money is putting your family first, my family is rather fond of eating food and having a warm house.^

Yep.

Nuffaluff · 23/01/2021 08:37

I don’t serve anyone. I’m not a servant.

LonginesPrime · 23/01/2021 08:40

OP, that's how strawmanning works.

Have you read anything else about feminism before deciding it's a bad idea, or will you just wait until you see another meme containing a counter-argument to push you back in the other direction?

MillieEpple · 23/01/2021 08:40

I am massively pro looking after young children as a valuable role but that poster has driven home to me how precarious being in the unpaid position of family servant is - more than any feminism post. For no pay, pension, annual leave, sick pay. Just a warm glow. Which i get at the weekends anyway.

icedgem85 · 23/01/2021 08:48

Neither. Feminism is equality. That’s it. It’s just as much a feminist choice to stay at home as it is to have a career.

cinnabarmoth · 23/01/2021 08:49

@KizzyWayfarer has it I think.

MissingLinker · 23/01/2021 08:54

Personally, I think The Female Eunuch gave a better insight... But who can argue with a meme?