It's only a bottle of wine...?

[homeschoollegend]

A friend of mine sent me a nice bottle of wine as a Christmas gift. I put it in the fridge at Christmas, but haven't fancied drinking it yet.

My OH stayed up late last night and I've just noticed that the bottle (it's quite an unusual shape, so distinctive) is in the recycling, empty. I'm pissed off that he's opened it without asking me if he can have some and that he drank the whole bottle so I couldn't even try it. He's still asleep so I haven't talked to him yet.

YABU- it's only a bottle of wine, get over yourself, woman.

YANBU- he's a selfish arse and needs to make amends.

@SleepingStandingUp no....but I live in a family. The rest of the family shouldn't have to ask every time they want to eat or drink. Food and drink in the fridge is for eating and drinking. Chocolates in the treat cupboard are for eating. If I don't want my husband to have something I say....ditto my kids.

@Mumdiva99 If something is a gift for someone else, you don't touch it, without it being offered to you. If your parents bought your child an Easter egg, you wouldn't plough through it on the basis that they left it out, would you?

No. You'd surreptitiously pick a bit off here and there when they weren't looking, like the rest of us. Same goes with the wine. But to open the bottle and chug through it is just rude!

Are you seriously getting wound up about a bottle of wine?

Easily replaced. Get on with your day.

[quote Mumdiva99]@SleepingStandingUp no....but I live in a family. The rest of the family shouldn't have to ask every time they want to eat or drink. Food and drink in the fridge is for eating and drinking. Chocolates in the treat cupboard are for eating. If I don't want my husband to have something I say....ditto my kids.[/quote]
I live in a family too but I wouldn't eat something I knew was my husband's gift whilst he was in bed when he'd only had it a few weeks. And not save hin any. And not offer to replace it when I saw he was upset.

@homeschoollegend

Thanks for replies so far! It's really rare for us to have a bottle of rose in the fridge. He normally has red wine, which I don't touch, and he knew it was a gift to me from my friend as he commented on the bottle when I opened it.

I think it's more thoughtlessness than deliberate selfishness, but those saying it depends how he reacts when I bring it up later are spot-on.

I was just about to say, it really depends if you would normally have wine in your fridge would he even remember it was a gift (my DH most likely wouldn't). I would be annoyed though if someone ate my chocolates etc that were a gift without asking (or even letting me try one!)

I would definitely mention it and his reaction would tell me how annoyed I was going to stay.

Well, in the short term he can make it right by replacing it.

How often does he drink a whole bottle? And what's he doing when he does? If it's rare and he's skyping or gaming, ie being as sociable as we can with lockdown and whatnot, I wouldn't worry so much.

But if it's common and he's drinking that much alone, I think that is problem drinking. "He had run out of wine last night" - so he was already drinking, the only thing left wasn't his, and he couldn't or wouldn't stop.

He's also drinking enough that he could be over the drink-drive limit the morning after. Does he know this? Does he stick to a policy of not driving the morning after he's downed a bottle?

[quote SnoozyLou]@Mumdiva99 If something is a gift for someone else, you don't touch it, without it being offered to you. If your parents bought your child an Easter egg, you wouldn't plough through it on the basis that they left it out, would you?

No. You'd surreptitiously pick a bit off here and there when they weren't looking, like the rest of us. Same goes with the wine. But to open the bottle and chug through it is just rude![/quote]
Many parents eat their children's Easter eggs

They're replaced usually but it's an odd comparison considering

Yes, it’s very selfish. And I find the complacency about alcohol on MN really baffling - smoke one cigarette and you’re vile, drink a whole bottle of wine to yourself on your own and that’s completely normal. Really weird.

@cherrypie111 Erm... it was meant to be a joke.

I wouldn't touch something given as a present to someone else and, in return, wouldn't appreciate them helping themselves to a gift meant for me. It's just about boundaries. They must be different in other families.