Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this rude comment was unwarranted? (Supermarket rage!)

326 replies

CrossFitAddict · 15/01/2021 17:07

Just popped to the supermarket for a few bits and on exiting the checkouts I come out behind an elderly lady with another woman walking with her side by side (probably her daughter). It’s about 50ft to the exit and the elderly lady is walking extremely slowly holding onto a trolley (no problem with her at all), the other woman with her is walking at the same pace and blocking the walkway (she was rather large) so there’s a queue of us behind them.

As the area widened I walked quickly around them, a good distance from the elderly lady, and sped up to the entrance hearing the other woman shout loudly ‘some people can’t wait for other people can they’. I turned as I heard her (as did everyone else) and wanted to say that she should have moved to the side and walked single file behind the older lady if she had any manners but didn’t bother and just shook my head.

AIBU to think that if you’re walking with a slow moving person, you should move to the side rather than hold up everyone else and then take umbrage if someone overtakes you Angry.

OP posts:
ilovesooty · 15/01/2021 18:47

@georgiamag1

"Lucky you were in a good mood" 😳what would have happened if you weren't 😱
The OP might have actually used her words instead of starting a thread to whinge about something that only happened in the moment and is pretty inconsequential. She's probably one of those people though who struggles with assertive response but is unable to let things go as well.
dancinfeet · 15/01/2021 18:47

Our tesco have narrowed the entrance with a barrier and then put hand sanitiser in the doorway. I was waiting behind an elderly lady who was sanitising her trolley and hands, at least 3 people then pushed past her to get in through the door. Yes she was taking her time but it was really rude. The thing that did it for me though, was when she finally moved through the door and a woman who had stopped alongside me rushed past me and through the door. If there had been room for the elderly lady to move sideways she probably would have done, you couldnt get a trolley past but the people pushing by had hand baskets. Where possible you should walk/stand to one side, but if someone ahead is moving slowly then only overtake if there is room for you to do so with social distancing. If you go closer than 2m to them unnecessarily then you are impatient and rude.

FrostyChocolateMilkshake · 15/01/2021 18:48

YANBU OP! Slow walkers piss me off too - I like to get in and out of a shop as quick as possible.

NuniaBeeswax · 15/01/2021 18:48

Well why didn't you say it?

SkiWays · 15/01/2021 18:50

I wouldn't walk past at the entrance but we need to get out asap tbh so if I can pass quickly I would.

Tal45 · 15/01/2021 18:50

She sounds like a mardy cow, why should you not pass her, you waited until there was enough room. Some people are so selfish and entitled and just want things all their own way with no thought to the queue of people stuck behind them.
Why the elderly woman didn't stay home while her daughter shopped for her I don't know considering she is probably vulnerable.

elmfield4 · 15/01/2021 18:51

Some of these responses are hilarious. YANBU Confused

Jayne35 · 15/01/2021 18:55

The OP might have actually used her words instead of starting a thread to whinge about something that only happened in the moment and is pretty inconsequential. She's probably one of those people though who struggles with assertive response but is unable to let things go as well

Some people really struggle with this, I know I do. A guy had a loud moan about me last week as I sneezed when I got out of my car about 4 metres away from him. To be fair it would have sounded like a cough as I hold sneezes in but he was very loud and aggressive. It played on my mind for ages running over what I should have said. So mumsnet is a good place to vent and get these things out of your head.

LondonJax · 15/01/2021 18:56

There's a lot of reasons why two people may shop together - I think it was only a couple of days ago someone was mentioning that someone in their family couldn't leave their DP at home as the other person had dementia and was prone to wandering.

So, if the elderly lady was like that and lived with the other woman, it may have been safer to bring her out than leave her at home alone.

As far as walking next to each other, I had to do this with my mum towards the end of her life as she would trip very easily (she had Alzheimer's which makes it very hard to work out space - black areas on floors are seen as holes for example which makes the person suddenly stop. If mum was pushing a trolley for support, suddenly stopping whilst still pushing would potentially lead to her 'chinning herself' on the handle of the trolley as she'd tip forward! But without the trolley she'd be all over the place. Also, if you tried to walk behind her to let someone pass, she'd stop and turn around to find you. Dementia can play awful tricks on people's spatial awareness. So, making a big assumption, if the elderly lady was similar I'd be loathe to leave her walking in front or behind alone.

BUT, having said that, I always apologised if we held people up and I'd certainly never tut at someone overtaking us. In fact, we'd try to pull as far over as possible to allow people to pass.

So yes, she was rude but YABU if you think every elderly person can be left alone at home.

You can never tell someone's personal circumstances.

TheNestedIf · 15/01/2021 18:59

You should have said "Quite right. It's very rude to overtake. I'm so sorry."

Since you were then in front, you should have carried on walking at approximately the pace of a knackered tortoise.

littlepattilou · 15/01/2021 18:59

RUDE? To just overtake someone walking (slowly) in a supermarket?! Confused

What in the name of fuck is wrong with some people on here?

YANBU @CrossFitAddict No I would NOT have waited, nope, not even '2 minutes' as a poster suggested earlier, and I WOULD have overtaken her.

Why should I wait? Why WOULD I wait?

LMFAO. 😂 Some people on here. Typical Mumsnet responses!

SchadenfreudePersonified · 15/01/2021 19:02

@AlexisCarringtonColbyDexter

YANBU.

Its fine for them to take their time but they cant then get pissy if they are blocking the way for people to get past them. If you are very slow moving you should ensure people can get around you.

Some people are on their lunch breaks etc and dont have time to travel super slowly.

I think you are a bit U about the comment about her size, morality is not bound to size

It was a description, not a judgement.

A big person takes up more room than a small one and has more potential to block an area.

Pixie2015 · 15/01/2021 19:03

I wish you had told her she should be in single file - I feel your frustration

SchadenfreudePersonified · 15/01/2021 19:04

Sorry - I don't know how I accidentally hit a quote button (an for a "not relevant" post, too)

MichelleScarn · 15/01/2021 19:04

The OP might have actually used her words instead of starting a thread to whinge about something that only happened in the moment and is pretty inconsequential. She's probably one of those people though who struggles with assertive response but is unable to let things go as well

Reaching a bit with such detailed character assassination of the OP? Confused

CoronaIsWatching · 15/01/2021 19:05

Personally I'm fed up to the back teeth of slow walkers, people blocking pavements and paths. Just get out me way!

VinylDetective · 15/01/2021 19:11

Why should I wait? Why WOULD I wait?

Bloody hell, it really is all about you, isn’t it?

Queenoftheashes · 15/01/2021 19:12

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

donquixotedelamancha · 15/01/2021 19:13

Could you not have just waited? Like, two minutes

You could tell this story on a male dominated forum and in a million years it would never receive this response.

I genuinely cannot understand why anyone thinks it's wrong to walk round someone else.

SkiWays · 15/01/2021 19:16

Wait two minutes extra indoors in the time of Corona?

No way José.

donquixotedelamancha · 15/01/2021 19:17

I walk quickly but I know not everyone can. Fat shaming and elderly shaming just for a couple of minutes of your time. Sorry, just not how I think.

I just can't tell whether this is sarcasm anymore. I want to go back to 2014 when satire was still possible.

ilovesooty · 15/01/2021 19:17

@MichelleScarn

The OP might have actually used her words instead of starting a thread to whinge about something that only happened in the moment and is pretty inconsequential. She's probably one of those people though who struggles with assertive response but is unable to let things go as well

Reaching a bit with such detailed character assassination of the OP? Confused

You might think so. However she wanted to say things in reply that she didn't say and she felt the need to start a detailed thread on here, so she evidently couldn't let it go.
whitechocolatehobnobs · 15/01/2021 19:20

I don't think you were rude at all or did anything wrong!

MustardMitt · 15/01/2021 19:21

YANBU about any of your post, it's fine to mention the woman's size and the other one's age fgs, it's important scene setting!

Why does OP need to wait when she walked round two women who were in front of her? Is it now apparently rude to overtake?

Confusedandshaken · 15/01/2021 19:24

If you are frail/infirm/in pain to the point you walk conspicuously slowly you probably are focussing on getting to your destination safely rather than worrying about someone who behind you who may or not be in a hurry. I doubt very much that you are so busy and important OP that you couldn't have slowed down for 2 minutes.

That being said, she was equally wrong to shout at you.

Swipe left for the next trending thread