AIBU to think it’s ok to put kids (4 and 1) into kids club on a ski holiday

[Needallthesleep]

Obviously not this year! Planning for the future.

DH and I love to ski, and given what a shocker this year has been for holidays (plus we have a newborn so not like we can go away anyway) we are planning an epic one next year.

It would be the first time going skiing with our kids, and are planning on putting the 4 year old into ski school and the 1 year old into kids club so we can ski.

For context we are looking at doing 14 nights in a very kid friendly hotel in France with childcare on site. We are planning a 2 week break so that we (and the children) can have some relaxed days together at the pool/sledging and me and DH still get a decent amount of time skiing.

MIL thinks that’s mean. And I am wracked with mum guilt about our plans now. Are my plans unreasonable?

I wouldn't worry too much about the occasional session in crèche; however, I'd be a bit wary about skiing with DH just in case something happened to both of you.

X post.

Why not go for a week, leave baby with MIL and take DD4?

@LongDivision

I wouldn't worry too much about the occasional session in crèche; however, I'd be a bit wary about skiing with DH just in case something happened to both of you.

Do you also travel in separate cars and planes to your husband?

We did it at similar ages. 4 is definately a good age to start skiing (Dd who is DC2) who was 3. They need that kindergarden year so they can go to "big ski school " at 5. The one year old won't get much out of it TBH but some of the mountain nurseries are beautiful pm if you want suggestions. I wouldn't leave them in a Chalet Hotel I would use a proper nursery or a nanny.

I'd love to know what you think the 1 year old can possibly expect from a "family holiday" 😂

Time with mum & dad.

We took our two on a beach holiday in uk last summer. 11m old just thrilled to be with us both all day every day, digging in sand on beach.

Children do actually LIKE their parents at that age.

@BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz I had better not show my DH this thread or that would give him ideas! He loves golf a bit too much.

Slightly different point of view but I was on ski school from being 4 and absolutely loved it. I have really fond memories of doing that and then having time with my parents in the evenings to do fun things like have fondue and go sledging. I wouldn't even hesitate.

No, because I wouldn’t leave my dc’s with complete strangers at that age. I didn’t leave mine in kids clubs until the youngest was about 4 - and that was with their older siblings keeping an eye out too.
It’s a personal choice but I probably would judge people who did that (not that they’d care I’m sure). We had friends who went on mark warner holidays and left their dc’s in childcare all day and I just felt like what is the actual point of going on a family holiday and then leaving the dc’s in childcare every day? I know lots of people love that kind of thing, but I actually enjoy having mine with me when we have precious time for a holiday.
I get it may be difficult with a skiing holiday but I’d rather just leave them at home with the IL’s.

Oh DS took his first steps in the Alps

@hopefulhalf

Oh DS took his first steps in the Alps

This might be the most MN sentence of all time

Have done it- from when babies were 4 months- they have always loved it. Lots of Mark Warner holidays- they had amazing crèche with all the toys you could imagine- kids very happy, we ski’d had tea and a swim with the kids then they went to bed and we had grown up dinner.

Am clearly bad mum of the year for enjoying skiing and being ok with using child care not spending every hour of my holidays with my kids.

My DH and I went as babysitters for our daughter and her DP when her DS was coming up to one. He didn't like the cold at all and looked miserable every time he went outside.
Our daughter would have had fifty fits if she'd been left in childcare until she was 5ish.
Our DS would have been fine.
Basically you can't predict what they will be like in advance.. Better to wait and see closer to the time rather than booking in advance.
Regarding the 4 year old, again you can't tell if they'll take to it. It's so much easier if you live near a ski area and can go when they and the weather are both positive. Also 4 is quite young and there's an awful lot of nose-wiping and getting skis and clothes on and off to go to the loo - hard work. Ours learned to ski when they were 6 and 9 (after a fews practices on a dry ski slope) and were off in no time - in fact DD was caught taking a smaller child up between her legs on a T-- bar lift on the first day!
I do know people who have had very good holidays from companies with high quality childcare included, eg Ski Famille, so it can be done - if you can afford it and the baby is agreeable! !

I'm a single mum and have used Scott Dunn for a few holidays.

I'd go for it . They have great clubs.

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland

I'd love to know what you think the 1 year old can possibly expect from a "family holiday" 😂

Time with mum & dad.

We took our two on a beach holiday in uk last summer. 11m old just thrilled to be with us both all day every day, digging in sand on beach.

Children do actually LIKE their parents at that age.

You do realise that you 11mo has no concept of time and, while he/she may enjoy being with you “in the moment” they don’t keep count on the calendar or even perceive that it is “all day every day”?

It wouldn't be my idea of a family holiday. However, someone above said they had done this sort of holiday and you wouldn't be able to ski all day as ski school is half a day.

I think holidays where you do exactly what you want are on hold for a while when you have children, others don't. I think it's better than leaving them home, unless you plan a long weekend skiing with just you too and then do something more famiy focused as a family.

@CheetasOnFajitas I don't, but I would think about it if doing a high risk sport (not ordinary skiing, I suppose, but off piste type skiing)

I personally wouldn’t. Putting a one year old in a new childcare care setting for two weeks will be confusing and potentially stressful for them.

Definitely - they'll love playing with other kids - so long as the 1 year old is happy - no doubt the 4 year old won't want to come back to mummy and daddy.

I can't comment on leaving the younger one in the creche, but we took ours aged 5 when she'd had lessons on the nearest dry slope. We skied in the morning during ski school, then we all skied together in the afternoon and she loved it.

Things to check when dropping off - do any of the children in the group speak English? They didn't in DD's first group so they moved her to another one where they did, and it worked brilliantly.

This Mumsnet book has a chapter on skiing with toddlers. When I picked it up in the library some years ago, it gave me an inkling that Mumsnet may not be for me :-D Still here though.
www.amazon.co.uk/Toddlers-Mumsnet-Guide-Million-Secrets/dp/0747595887/ref=sr_1_5?dchild=1&keywords=mumsnet&tag=mumsnetforu03-21&qid=1610635737&sr=8-5

[quote LongDivision]@CheetasOnFajitas I don't, but I would think about it if doing a high risk sport (not ordinary skiing, I suppose, but off piste type skiing)[/quote]
The answer to that is that you ski with your partner but don’t do risky things like off piste. We take fewer risks now we have a child and always wear helmets. Yes, anyone can have a bad fall but the chances of both parents being injured on a standard day’s on-piste skiing are pretty minimal.

I wouldn't do it, no, because the childcare provision can be so patchy and the one year old will still be so young. You are likely to feel stressed if they don't enjoy it, and as a result it will ruin your holiday.

Ski school can be very very tiring and not all children enjoy it at all.

I would book a long weekend with dh and ask MIL to look after the dc at home. Much better arrangement for the dc especially.

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland

I'd love to know what you think the 1 year old can possibly expect from a "family holiday" 😂

Time with mum & dad.

We took our two on a beach holiday in uk last summer. 11m old just thrilled to be with us both all day every day, digging in sand on beach.

Children do actually LIKE their parents at that age.

My kids like us at any age, but it's completely irrelevant.

People are quick to suggest dumping the kids with friends or relative every weekend or every holiday, but god forbid the family could travel together and spend some time apart.

I have taken holidays with my kids since they were born. I do disagree with the hypocrites on here. Parents and child can have lovely time even if they are not glued together

I can totally understand parents wanting some adult time on holiday. That’s not unreasonable. But I wouldn’t leave a one year old in a childcare setting I wasn’t familiar with, personally, and I’m generally pretty relaxed about these things. It’s very young.

It’s probably worth a punt with the four year old; the chances are she’ll love it. But be prepared for the possibility that she won’t - this happened to a friend of mine; her son point blank refused to go back to ski school after his first session, and she felt pretty bitter that her husband then got to go off skiing every morning leaving her stuck in the chalet doing child care on her own. She said the holiday was an expensive mistake. A couple of years later they tried again though, and her ds loved it, and they all had a great time.

Re Mark Warner, the dd of a friend of mine worked for them as a rep a couple of years ago. They treated her and the other reps very badly. I would never use that company myself after hearing of her experiences. They are hardly a budget outfit either - if I was paying that I would expect their staff to be treated well and paid decently.

16 years ago