How to bag a wealthy man?

[Simonstrousers]

Realise I’m going to get flamed for this, but how many of you if you really were completely honest, would prefer to be with a wealthy man, given the choice?
How do you attract them, what type of women do they go for?
I live abroad, 10 minutes away are multi millionaire pound villas, extensive gyms and restaurants etc. I’ve seen these men with a mix of women..some much younger and glamorous (fairly obvious) but many of the wives are fairly quiet and quite plain.
How go these women generally end up with these men?

@Blueblossombush

My stepdaughter is like this

Her whole aim in life is to marry a rich man,stay at home,have loads of cats and shop for whatever she wants without having to work for it (she’s 19 and refuses to get a job)

She refuses to have children as they ‘get in the way’

I told her that kids are her insurance just in case rich man gets bored with her but I got told to ‘shut the fuck up’

She only went to uni so she can meet this rich man,and dumped a lovely fella because he got high grades but turned his uni place down as he’d got a low paying job (the idea is he’ll work his way up)

I got into a whole heap of trouble for asking her if prostitution was the only way she’d get on in life-after all sleeping with a man just for his money is just that

I’m the fool (in her eyes) for having a full time job-I should demand her dad (my partner) should pay for me while I piss about at home as all women should

I think that having my job brings me my self respect and pride in my pay packet

I brought my own daughters (and sons) up to pay their own way and never depend on anyone long term (I do get that life ebbs and flows-sometimes you do have to depend on your partner but for the whole you earn your own independence)

I cannot remember how many times I’ve trotted out the line ‘women died so you have the right to vote,make your own choices in life,to be able to work and for your independence’

It seems to have sunk in for the whole part

I think you'll just have to let her get on with it. You can't make her mistakes for her.

@DottyHarmer

But she is making her own choice!

Cousin worked in a hotel in London a few years ago, at the height of the WAG thing. She said they had to have barricades to keep back the swarms of girls after the footballers who would be staying there for away matches. Top (or even not so top) footballers earn a great deal of money so bagging one would be jackpot time. Getting pregnant, cementing the jackpot win. Frankly I suppose if you have the right type of looks it’s a reasonable financial move.

Most people I know married to wealthy-ish men met them early on when neither were rich. If you are aspiring to an already rich person (either sex) then basically you have to be in their orbit and be extremely attractive. Or go for someone a bit vulnerable and be very persistent (Yoko Ono method…).

John Lennon was a grown man and a rich and famous rock star who made his own choices.

@NetballHoop

Take a deep look into Melania Trump's eyes. Do you want to be that miserable?

Just go out and find someone you actually like and make a life together.

😂😂😂😂😂 THIS X 1 million

I was offered marriage by two wealthy men. I refused because I didn't love them. I went on to meet DH who didn't have a pot to piss in. We were absolutely in love, got married, had DC and then, after 17 years, he died.

I have never regretted my decision. Our love was so profound and he was my best friend.

Marriage and parenting are challenging. You need to be a team. Marrying for money is incredibly dim.

Dating apps, I'd imagine.

Not gonna flame you OP, you are a product of your culture.

Come to think of it though, this website has gone to absolute shit.

Look for someone with ambition who is hard working and conscientious, that way they have every opportunity to become wealthy in the future, as do you.

Not read the full thread.
This is an awful attitude sorry OP.
My DH is wealthy. He has reasonable family wealth so had some wealth before we first met. But honestly, looking at our lives and that of our friends, you as a woman need to be on an equal footing to a man.
That means have equal wealth, education, lifestyle etc. DH and I earned similar prior to kids, have senior professional jobs, similar education. I was already wealthy before he met me and that was because of my job. I didn’t fall for him because of his wealth, more that he fit in well with my lifestyle, family and friends circle. Our personalities were complimentary.

It would appear feminism is well and truly dead in the water

@Malibuismysecrethome

It would appear feminism is well and truly dead in the water

Well to be fair, most of the responses aren't supportive of this approach.

I'm really not entirely convinced it's completely serious. Is this really where you'd look for a true answer to that question?

@Simonstrousers

Realise I’m going to get flamed for this, but how many of you if you really were completely honest, would prefer to be with a wealthy man, given the choice? How do you attract them, what type of women do they go for? I live abroad, 10 minutes away are multi millionaire pound villas, extensive gyms and restaurants etc. I’ve seen these men with a mix of women..some much younger and glamorous (fairly obvious) but many of the wives are fairly quiet and quite plain. How go these women generally end up with these men?

They choose women for one or more of the following:

1. For beauty and youth
2. To match their own wealth so they don't have to "keep" a woman.
3. To team up to build more wealth - a great charming, beautiful hostess and partner to build the business and wealth - that's a 24 hour job.

4 Ruthlessness. These men are often ruthless and don't want a kind woman with a conscience to undermine their ego. The women are often as ruthless and lacking in scruples as the men.

I'm poor but I live in a very rich village. I know a lot of these people.

@YouWereGr8InLittleMenstruators - totally agree that a financial imbalance creates a power imbalance no matter how subtle. If you marry a man instead of earning your own money, he’s your boss. And no one is the boss of me!

I forgot number 5 - they choose a women who makes them feel good about themselves.

The only woman I know who's married a rich man met him at work.

She was a senior PA at a city firm. He was already a high-flier when they got together and has had several promotions since then. He had a 7-figure salary years ago. I dread to think what it might be now. And even 20 years ago he got a bonus of over a mill.

They have a beautiful big house in a nice part of London, another house in the country, a cottage in the SW, a huge place in SW France and a villa in the Caribbean.

But her life is empty and vapid and she's really unhappy. She hasn't worked since they had their first child, who's now at uni, they have an au pair, cleaners and gardeners, she seems to do nothing but have beauty treatments, shop, and go out for lunch with other bored women who are married to rich men. Oh, and "renovate" the houses, which don't even need it.

A relative of hers is a friend of mine, and friend is really worried about her MH. Her husband is due to retire, and friend's relative thinks she'll hate having to spend time with him. All the time they've been together, he's worked incredibly long hours and travelled a lot for work. They've really only spent time together on holidays. She has no idea what she will do when they're at home together.

I'd love the money, but I wouldn't want her life.

I am married to an amazing man, his wealth is largely irrelevant to me as we connected from the moment we met, and the chemistry was there. I would have married him regardless. He married me because I am a strong, optimistic, happy go getter type just like him. We are very well matched.

I did not choose him for his wealth, but I would also never marry someone terrible with money or no prospects, as I would not want to spend my life destitute or with someone with a dead weight. You are better off on your own!

I would never have children with someone that was not solvent and with a good career. I would prefer a life that is single and carefree

@Malibuismysecrethome

It would appear feminism is well and truly dead in the water

As someone who "bagged" her rich man...

I work full time and pay my own chunk of the mortgage for my own peace of mind... but even if I didn't...

I'm of the opinion that this capitalist nightmare system is something that women had no part in creating and only the most peripheral role in maintaining. Basing your self worth on being "independent" in this sort of system is a smokescreen.

I personally think I'm a decent feminist and that my mama taught me well.

test

I've been thinking about this. I 'married well' and know that at least 4/5 of my former boyfriends (could have married, as in we were compatible no big dramas, just wrong time) are now multi millionaires.
They weren't Etonians or Silicon valley nerds, several different industries and I'm attractive but nothing amazing at all. I was probably punching slightly above my weight looks wise. And I'm not privately educated so it's not that I was fishing in a rich set.
What they all had in common and what we were attracted to each other by was a hinterland and boldness. So we read and went to the cinema and theatre as well as got stoned and had lots of sex. So basically fun rounded relationships with interesting people.

If you did meet a wealthy man why would he marry a goldigger?

I would choose happiness love and health over money any day.

Well I have always said if I ever marry again it will be for money since the first time didn't work out (for your information I am still married and in love but if that doesn't work maybe I need to try something differen LOL)

If you did meet a wealthy man why would he marry a goldigger?

Leaving aside the fact that the insult is only for the woman, as per usual, presumably because she's providing whatever it is he's willing to pay for. Which might not be sex. Could be a beautiful trophy wife, permission for an open marriage or anything else.

• In DH's upper class family circle they tend to marry within the wider circle, and even marry cousins. They literally have parties and social events aimed at introducing the right partners.

• In the case of our friends it's usually one of two options:

1. Both partners from similar backgrounds and with prestigious universities and careers (though the women often go part-time once there are children).
2. One partner from a wealthy background, the other is more middle or working class but very bright and did well at uni, went into a prestigious career, although again many of the women go PT after children.

All of my exes were from middle middle/upper middle/upper class families, we got to know each other due to similar interests, or going to same universities. I have never ever gone after a man because of his money.

DH is a high earner and has significant family money. I didn't know that when I met him, and due to cultural differences I couldn't really read his status. We got together because we fancied each other and got on well, and had similar interests.

I think the big leveller is university. If you get into a prestigious university then the people you meet will either be wealthy already, or will have the potential to become wealthy (although they might decide to become something worthy but less well paid).

@DrSbaitso

If you did meet a wealthy man why would he marry a goldigger?

Leaving aside the fact that the insult is only for the woman, as per usual, presumably because she's providing whatever it is he's willing to pay for. Which might not be sex. Could be a beautiful trophy wife, permission for an open marriage or anything else.

It's no more insuloting than 'How to bag a wealthy man'..

A man could get that by paying for a prostitute which would be cheaper upfront and better value than some one who wants a wealthy man for life.

If he wants a beautiful trophy wife, the inevitable time will come when he wants a newer model which he could get with a prostitute.

An open marriage? Why would he bother when you can pay many different prostitutes without the worry of division of assets.

I'm also still working (part-time) despite the face DH's income is many times higher than mine, to the extent that one month's bonus for him has been my entire annual salary.

I want to keep my independence, I love my career, I'd be bored sick without a career. The money is nice because it means I can work PT and spend more time with the DC, and do some volunteer work too. I also don't want a power dynamic where I'm entirely dependent on any man.

I know of a few very rich men (as in £100 million plus) and they all met their wives at uni or shortly afterwards and are still with them. All self-made. Nothing remotely flash about them. Some live practically in the middle of nowhere. The wives have tended to be SAH because these men definitely have had workaholic phases (or should I say, decades). But it all paid off and on the plus side, the men were essentially retired in their 40s and now free to pick and choose projects / investments that interest them. My own DH is one of these (though he didn’t get such a massive pay out). I have always been SAH as it was extremely full on with him for many years. He was very driven to the point of an extreme workaholic, so I’ve had to balance him out over the years and it wasn’t always easy. He’s definitely more balanced now though and takes time for his hobbies (although these are quite ‘extreme’ to be fair, but I have nothing to do with it). But he has no interest in “stuff” and is exactly the same as when I met him when he was 25 and had no money.