To want a baby at 42

[Flo0109]

Hi everyone,
My DH and I already have two DS’s 18 & 15 and I cannot stop thinking about having a third child. DH worries that he is too old at 47 and we really can see age as being the only thing that is making us hesitate. Is there anyone here who has a DH around this age and how did it work out and am I too old at 42?
TIA

I came on to say yes, as I had a baby at the same age, but no way would I have done it with siblings almost grown. I had plenty of more care free years in my 20s, but you just have had small children then and you are planning to do it again? Up to you but I would not risk what I had now for that.

You must be nuts to even consider it

I have a 13 and 10 year-old with my ex-husband and a 7 month-old with my fiancé (his first...and last!!) I'm 40 and he's almost 45). Our daughter's older half-siblings so far have been absolutely brilliant with their new sister.
Lockdown has made things pretty difficult though as I'm sure you can imagine!

I've got two grown up children (20 and 22) and two a bit younger (11 and 15) and I think at this point I want to wait for grandchildren. I'm looking forward to a few years without young ones in the family and then hopefully a new brood of little ones will come along that I don't have 24/7 care of! I can appreciate in early 40's we still feel young enough to have babies and toddlers but in reality it's another 20 odd years of raising a child. I definitely wouldn't want to start from scratch with my own even though the idea of snuggling babies is quite appealing.

Get a puppy!

I would go for it, my friends mum had her at 42, ( 10 year age gap from brother) , and they've always been very close and happy.

I live in London and this is not an unusual age to have your first around here. Certainly the vast majority of first time mums in my baby group were late 30s or early (and mid) 40s

Some interesting responses here! I think this actually used to be more common, for whatever reason (possibly doctors stopping pill prescriptions at 40).

One problem is that, having been used to raising a pair of children, a de facto only child is likely to seem lonely, especially given that you're now older.

Two of my best friends at schools were numbers 3... and 4... in a family of this structure. Having had a surprise/planned third, both families then had a fourth, creating effectively two pairs of siblings. But in that case the parents were slightly younger, first children in mid twenties (like my parents), second lot of children in late 30s. At 42, I think it's fairly likely that you'll be able to conceive a child over the next couple of years if you try every month and haven't had any fertility problems. (Though it may fake a while.) But the odds are very much against having another child after that. Just something to think about. I'm the only child of young parents but both had poor health and it's not easy dealing with that as a teenager / young adult.