To not have eaten the meal DP cooked for us?

[NameofTheWind]

For context: DP will eat pretty much anything, he's more of a quantity over quality type and open admits that fancy food is largely wasted on him. He would choose a larger, normal cut of steak over filet, for example.
I'll eat most things, but am a bit of a foodie so get excited about a good meal.

DP's cooking style could be described as... "pot luck dining" - if it's in the fridge, it's in the pan. Most of the time it's vaguely edible, if a bit eclectic.

Today he decided on curry - Jar of sauce, chicken and maybe some onion and pepper... Or so I thought.

I've just been presented with a curry comprising of chicken, sauce, onion, pepper... Courgette chunks, sweetcorn and button mushrooms.

The sauce has turned to coloured curryish flavour water because of all the veg, and something has happened to the chicken to make it indistinguishable from the mushrooms.

I made a really valiant effort to eat it but its so grim

I've had to admit defeat and DP has obviously noticed. He's such a lovely man and I feel like such a cow, but this is a terrible meal right??

You can't just bung things in a pan and expect a decent result.People do this when making soup.All you end up with is baby food.

"Pot luck cook" is bullshit if you don't know what you're doing with food. My DP is great at it but he's interested in food, reads, understands what goes with what, timings, what spices work, etc. I haven't a clue and if I don't follow a recipe to the letter anything I make will taste like shit. Honestly, I could ruin anything! But I know this so I won't just throw something together. I have recipes and timers going off. Your DP needs to know his limitations. There'll be some stuff I'm sure he can do a decent job of. YANBU though, because that particular attempt at a curry sounds rank.

I shove everything in a curry, what ever veg is in the fridge, mushrooms are fine, peas are fine and often courgettes. I would have eaten it.

I'd be so pathetically grateful to anyone who cooked me anything that I wouldn't complain.

(I loathe cooking, btw).

I love vegetables in curry but the watery sauce doesn't sound brilliant

Sounds rank tbh.

A veggie curry made properly with homemade sauce is delicious though.

And actual curries use different techniques and spices and combination to suit the food being cooked.

My MIL makes a squash curry (with squashes, that are watery) that could be adapted for courgettes, but the cooking is specifically geared to the sweetness of the squash.

And it is cooked to be quite a dry curry actually.

I wouldn't enjoy any of these sloppy concoctions of fridge dregs and bottled sauce.

My DP is similar! He once made a curry, and we didn’t have any chopped tomatoes so he put in a tin of tomato soup. Then, it was too tomatoey, so he put in a jug full of chicken gravy... it was inedible! YANBU

I always add that amount of veg to a curry sauce. I wouldn't use sweet corn but everything else on that list goes in often with some green beans. The only thing I can think is that he didn't drain the sweet corn otherwise it should be fine.

Im a bit of a pot luck cook, I hate following recipes, I just make it up as I go along. However I do have a rudimentary knowledge of cooking and would have fried off the courgettes and mushrooms before adding them later on. I still can’t imagine how they’d make the sauce so watery unless there were loads of them! But in that case I think I’d have intervened (spoony fucker that I am) and suggested he add some ground almonds or something to thicken it up a bit.

@y0rkier0se

My DP is similar! He once made a curry, and we didn’t have any chopped tomatoes so he put in a tin of tomato soup. Then, it was too tomatoey, so he put in a jug full of chicken gravy... it was inedible! YANBU

Oh good lord!

sweet is a hate crime iMO, but I think the OP's point is not about veg but that her husband doesn't think about flavour combos or flavour at all.

can you teach him to cook say 5 dishes over lock down?

That does sound grim. I wouldn't bother too much about hurting his feelings, he must he's know he's a rubbish cook.
(You're wrong about steak, though. Other cuts have more flavour than fillet!)

Get coooking, no fab effort, get a slow cooker or multi pot, be motivated

Sounds fine. Dh introduced me to chicken korma. I added mushrooms. Yum. I also love courgettes and sweetcorn so while I wouldn't put them in the curry I would eat them if the cook had.

If you're not a decent cook, your only option is to grimly and fastidiously follow the recipe. I hate cooking but made a perfectly decent pasta alfredo the other day because I didn't take any chances and did what I was told.

It's like flat pack furniture... Read the instructions before you begin, follow them step-by-step and don't even think about getting creative.

@HaveeeeYouMetTed

YABU. Mushrooms in a curry are delicious. Why didn't you just pick out the additional veg you didn't want in the dish & eat the rest?

Because it was watery and nasty

Watery curry is awful yanbu

cooked properly veg in curry is fine the problem appears to be he didn't cook it properly

You are not a 'foodie' if you are using jar cooking sauces. Vile things.

YABU to describe yourself as a foodie, and you are even more unreasonable to describe yourself as a foodie then rely on jarred sauces! It's not the vegetables it's the gloop he cooked them in.

YANBU as I'm with you curry just needs, meat, onion and pepper. Roasting the veg might've been much nicer as it's just sweating and oozing out water otherwise. But at least you have a DP who is willing to cook also.

Why didn't you just simmer it till it reduced down and removed the excess water?

Its chicken curry out of a jar short of burning it you can't hurt it by cooking it 20 mins or 2 hours.

This curry sounds pretty grim but the way forward is to help your DP become a better cook. In your position I'd have been appreciative and grateful of the effort... but still wouldn't have eaten it.

In my experience people who can't cook go in one of three directions: 1) pick a small handful of very easy recipes and rinse and repeat them forever; 2) outsource it - live on takeaways, ready meals or get a partner who cooks; 3) wing it by freestyling in the kitchen without having a clue what they're doing. 3) is the most dangerous type and most likely to produce something vile and inedible because 1) and 2) at least know their limits. What you need to do is turn DP into 1) - emphasise how important it is to know simple techniques and simple recipes that can make the outcome of what he tried tonight much better.

FWIW I'd have once described myself as a foodie who couldn't cook. Loads of interest in food, trying new things, eating well - but cack-handed and prone to getting in a flap when multitasking, neither of which serve me well on a practical level in the kitchen. I was rarely able to meet the standards I really wanted! Cooking alongside DP - who is a much better cook, knowledgeable enough to go off-piste from a recipe and calm enough to rescue most things that go wrong - has really helped me improve, and also concentrate my kitchen efforts into things I can do well.

Cooking together can break or make a relationship but it's worth a try if you both look at it in the spirit of wanting to improve or enjoy it more?

Can people stop picking on my use of the word "foodie"? I used it to try and succinctly explain that whilst I am not a picky eater, I enjoy good food.
The fact that I don't enjoy cooking every day and that I can stand the taste of a jar sauce does not exempt me from liking nice food. The jars I buy because that's the best way to get DP to cook something. I enjoy trying Michelin Starred restaurants and yet sometimes I crave a KFC. It's not mutually exclusive.
I work 12-14 hours a day, 6-7 days a week - forgive me for not wanting to spend another 1-3 hours each evening cooking.

And I don't have an issue with vegetables, I have an issue with badly cooked vegetables floating in a disgusting curry water.

I'm so tired and stressed and to repeatedly be insulted because I didn't use the word "foodie" correctly is the last thing I need. I like the taste of good food, would say trying new foods and exploring restaurants is a hobby, and can recognise the difference between good food and poor food, and actively prefer the good - therefore I'm a BIT of a foodie, as I understood the definition.
I didn't realise I had to reject all forms of preprepared sauces and ensure all my meals are cooked from scratch, preferably myself every single day in order to qualify for the title.

Mushrooms and squeeky food is not good.
Things cannot be bunged in a pan and the end result is a curry.
Get the Tailors Spice range, all will be well!