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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Opinions you have that aren't popular on mumsnet(2)

999 replies

Lockdowner35 · 03/01/2021 15:58

As the last thread reached 1000 posts

I will start

Jo Swinson would have do a better job than Boris on Coronavirus

OP posts:
KnitsAndGiggles · 04/01/2021 12:27

@RunningFromInsanity

Muscle doesn't weigh more than fat, a lb of feathers weighs the same as a 1lb of iron But you need a lot more feathers to make up that 1lb weight.
I didn't say anything about the density. Neither did the person I quoted they just said muscle weighs more than fat - it doesn't.
KnitsAndGiggles · 04/01/2021 12:28

@CounsellorTroi

Muscle doesn't weigh more than fat, a lb of feathers weighs the same as a 1lb of iron

If you filled two containers of identical volume with feathers and iron, which do you think would be heavier?

That wasn't the point in question. Nice try though.
Ohalrightthen · 04/01/2021 12:28

@RunningFromInsanity

Fat people are lazy

Breastfeeding in public is attention seeking

Out of interest, what are you supposed to do if your exclusively breastfed baby gets hungry in public?
blackcat86 · 04/01/2021 12:33

That both partners should contribute to household income unless there is an explicit agreement that one will be a SAHP. Your partner getting shitty with you because you refuse to work or have sporadic jobs doesn't make them financially abusive.

Girls should be taught in school about abusive relationships and the dangers of relying solely on thier partner for financial support.

Toddlers won't die if they watch a bit of TV.

Asking GPs for childcare doesn't make you entitled if there is an expectation that you will care for them in old age.

Not being able to afford basics for your child such as food and utilities is simply unacceptable and terrible parenting. There will always be a way to make things better or provide for your children if you really want to.

TeenyTinyDustinHoffman · 04/01/2021 12:33

The same volume of fat and the same volume of muscle are going to have different masses. I'm not sure what is contentious about this?

JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows · 04/01/2021 12:38

@Otellie

But many will face the prejudice that women do in the workplace/world once they have transitioned, along with the prejudice that they will face with being trans

What experience is that then? Lower pay because of their sex? No.
Sexual harressment because of their possession of a vagina? No again
Must be their ability to get pregnant and the issues around maternity rights in the work place. Oh wait, they can't and they don't have those issues do they.

In fact the only thing they have in common with women in the workplace is

  1. they're human
  2. they like to often wear clothes that many women often wear.

That's it. There's nothing else is there. There's a reason for that.

Well said
Laiste · 04/01/2021 12:39

Watching the clock till you can have alcohol is the same be it a nice glass of wine or a can of Stella.

JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows · 04/01/2021 12:40

@CounsellorTroi

Must be their ability to get pregnant and the issues around maternity rights in the work place. Oh wait, they can't and they don't have those issues do they.

Lots of bio women don’t have the ability to get pregnant for one reason or another. They’re still women aren’t they?

I don't think anyone claimed they weren't women if they didn't get pregnant - just that pregnancy discrimination is something ONLY women face.

Re posts like this see my earlier comment about being obtuse and argumentative for the sake of it.

hansgrueber · 04/01/2021 12:41

@popcorndiva

It's ok to be happy to give your newborn to your relatives to hold, cuddle. You are not a bad mother for not wanting to be strapped to your baby 24/7 and that it does the baby good too.
Oh, you're brave! I'm old enough to think that the fad for having your baby strapped to you 24 hours a day is cruel, I think that rise in MH problems among children stems from this trnd, they are not allowed any freedom. A baby is quite happy to play on a mat from a couple of months, they don't need constant interaction, that's to make the mother feel superior.
RunningFromInsanity · 04/01/2021 12:43

@Ohalrightthen

Having a baby you can't afford or care for properly because you "couldn't live with yourself if you had an abortion" is fucking selfish, and shitty parenting.
Agreed.
Crayfishforyou · 04/01/2021 12:48

I use loo brushes
I like big weddings
I like holidays abroad
I don’t like shopping at Mint Velvet, Uniqlo, Cos or Toast.
I didn’t like using a baby sling at all.
I’m a stepmother and I’m not a complete bitch

Pinborough · 04/01/2021 12:53

I quite like 'life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass it's about learning to dance in the rain' as a quote to put on your wall.

JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows · 04/01/2021 12:54

Do you think someone asks a baby boy what their gender is before they circumcise him?

No they don't - which is exactly my point. Discrimination is based off sex not gender.

Incidentally it's beyond offensive to compare circumcision to FGM.

. Sexism and gender based discrimination is not the same worldwide. It is not the same in every culture

But women in every culture the world over experience sex-based discrimination. And they have an almost identical level and experience of discrimination than other women in their culture. That's my whole point.

I would have massive issue with a women from the UK pretending that they are a half First Nations Canadian women, or even thinking they can pretend we have the same issues. Just like an African American will have an issue with a white person pretending to be them. Just like a transperson would have issue if I pretended to be trans.

Which is exactly why gender critical women have an issue with men claiming to be women and appropriating our sex. Because it's appropriated through a claim of "womanhood" which can't be defined without seemingly using sexist stereotypes. There is only one way to be a woman, and that is being an adult human of the female sex. Sex is what defines us and our lives not gender.

Because the person is appropriating a unique culture, not half the human race, which is no more a unique culture than men are a unique culture

A race is not a "unique culture". There is only one definition of a woman and one definition of a man. You cannot slip into the other because you think you "feel" like the opposite sex. "Woman isn't a culture" is just sloppy semantics.

My vagina is not a unique part of my identity or culture. 4 billion people have them. Nothing unique about it.

But having a vagina (no one said it was unique what a bizarre statement) totally and completely defines how you're treated, and oppressed, by society. It's not by accident that sexism is more often than not weighted towards women. And the vast majority of sexism is rooted in how our anatomy functions.

Female is not a culture

No it's not. EXACTLY. Female is a person based on their anatomy. You can't appropriate that. Appropriation is NOT just about appropriating "cultures" - it's about appropriating experiences and beings.

Also, what spaces? What fucking space exists in the world that only open in the presence of a vagina. Tell me that and I'll worry about transwomen getting into them

Female toilets
Changing rooms
Brownies, girl guides and other female only groups for young people
Girls-only schools
Female only gyms
Female only clubs (book clubs, dinner clubs)
Breastfeeding and mothers support groups
Rape and abuse support groups for women
Breast cancer and ovarian cancer support groups
Female Domestic violence shelters

To name but a few. Men Neil in none of the above. Men who claim womanhood belong in none of the above. All of the above have been fought very very hard for by feminists. They didn't just fall out the sky, and men certainly didn't fight for them for us. So a man clip clopping along with his claim that he is female because of [insert stereotype or wish washy nonsense] and pushing his way in is something many of us will not stand for

JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows · 04/01/2021 12:55

@RunningFromInsanity

Fat people are lazy

Breastfeeding in public is attention seeking

Or maybe people just want to give their baby's their lunch Confused is bottle feeding in public attention seeking?
BlackCakeyStuff · 04/01/2021 12:56

Men look down on women for gossiping because they'd like to be a able to do it but can't do it properly. That's why they spend so much time droning on about football, cars and upgrading their hard drives.

JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows · 04/01/2021 13:00

@Laiste

Watching the clock till you can have alcohol is the same be it a nice glass of wine or a can of Stella.
On this note, people who say "wine o'clock" should be rounded up and shot
Notimeforaname · 04/01/2021 13:02

CounsellorTroi Muscle doesn't weigh more than fat, a lb of feathers weighs the same as a 1lb of iron

Sorry!! I should have been clearer. For the amount of space it takes up I mean.
1 pound of muscle takes up much less room in the body than one pound of fat. So you can pack a lot more weight into a smaller person if they have lots of muscle

Notimeforaname · 04/01/2021 13:02

Iyswim

praepondero · 04/01/2021 13:05

I think marriage is a legal constraint to give potential offspring the best resources to be successful.
I believe being-in-love lasts 6 months as after that time-period, oxytocin is not produced in quantity that is required for that 'you are my world' feeling.
I believe that one should always put ones' family/people ahead of societal benefit.
I don't like pasta.
I believe most MN users hail firmly from LM class.
Beatles were dull.
I can't stand Brummie accent as it makes the speaker sound stupid.
I will be lynched for the last one....

Chanjer · 04/01/2021 13:07

Muscle doesn't weigh more than fat, a lb of feathers weighs the same as a 1lb of iron

People that think they're being clever by pointing that out Grin

hansgrueber · 04/01/2021 13:08

@JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows

It's not entitled to expect grandparents to do some childcare now and again. They should want to, if they're physically able.
It is entitled to expect anything from anyone for free. If the help is offered by all means accept it but you have no entitlement to demand/expect it, especially as the grandparents are expected to do things exactly as the mother says, if you want that degree of control then pay for it though even then you won't necessarily get it.
hansgrueber · 04/01/2021 13:10

@BlackCakeyStuff

Men look down on women for gossiping because they'd like to be a able to do it but can't do it properly. That's why they spend so much time droning on about football, cars and upgrading their hard drives.
Whereas women 'drone on' about babies, shopping, clothes, reality TV. Football and cars are far moe interesting, the exclusive company of women is dire!
IAmAMalenkyBitPoogly · 04/01/2021 13:13

"Unpopular opinions" threads on Mumsnet always become filled with knobheads who are seeking attention and trying hard to be controversial. Edgelords are what my DC would call them, I believe. There is always some giggling about loo brushes and then someone is a total twat about mental illness or breastfeeding or racism etc.

(@JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows you are definitely not included in that category as your posts are fabulous, as is your patience in the face of people either wilfully misunderstanding you, or unable to apply common sense or critical thinking)

JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows · 04/01/2021 13:13

@hansgrueber I disagree, if you choose to bring kids into the world then making family connections with their own children should be a privilege and enjoyment.

JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows · 04/01/2021 13:17

@IAmAMalenkyBitPoogly Grin

I forgot to mention in my list - not necessarily a physical space but an abstract space - is intimate medical care, such as smear tests. Women should absolutely be able to object to a man a even one that considers himself a woman - performing intimate care on them.

Also forgot to mention single sex wards.