to not give employee a chance?

[hippiedoodah]

I run a small business and hired an intern for three months early last year. He LOVED the job and spoke a lot about how this was almost his dream role etc etc.

I have hired a few people before and I had this gut feeling not to trust him in his first week that I have never had with other workers. He worked remotely and did the work. I wasn't impressed with his work but I kept a positive attitude and I gave him pointers to improve. I decided I wouldn't work with him again. There were many levels of mismatch with him being unreliable, narcissistic traits disguised as confidence, different personal values etc

He had no idea I felt like this. The position ended which felt like relief. I am always polite and since he was going there was no reason to be anything but polite.

Then...we needed someone very short notice for temp work the month after an employee quit without notice and he had been pestering me for a job and knew about this opening. My co founder suggested rehiring him since he knew our business and we were desperate, so I let him rejoin which was only meant to be for a week or two.

He had no idea that, although completely friendly outwardly, I really didn't feel he was right for the team. The position of two weeks just drew out longer and longer, there always was more work and we needed an extra pair of hands. I knew he was the wrong person but I was too exhausted to find another. He we there another two months.

My co-founder loves him as he is very charming and cannot see why I don't want to consider him. She and him socialize outside of work though an online group as they happen to know alot of the same people.

Now that position has ended but his 'dream role' is about to become available full time and I will be advertising it far and wide to find the best person. Co-founder wants to offer it to him but I really don't want to give him a second chance.

The problem is that he feels like I am one of his closest friends in London (my friednliness and enthusiasm) and he will assume it is his job and will ask for his start date/interview, he will pester me with calls etc. Whatever reason I give for him not being right for the role etc he will challenge and try and prove otherwise, he really needs the job and is struggling so much financially without any support and is being evicted, he has pulled on my emotional strings in the past.

He will be moving in the circles I am in for a long time so I have to stay on good form. He will find out about this opening very soon. I just have no idea how to turn him down and if I should just give him a chance and be firmer.

AIBU to veto this and not give him a chance. If I turn him down how do I do it without being an ass hole, what reason do I give that he can't dispute?

[quote hippiedoodah]@TheMobileSiteMadeMeSignup you don't have to judge me. It's not as simple as that. And I appreciate your honesty but I didn't come to be bashed.

He didn't respect my requests nor my goals for improvement. But he was charming and said all the right things before completely ignoring them. He was always on edge and the one time I had to be more firm, he almost exploded with rage and I could tell by his face as he sat in silence for the first time looking angry and being very defensive. He then emailed saying he was taking annual leave the next day. I told him that annual leave had to be booked in advance. He never showed up the next day. The day after he acted as if nothing happened and was shocked that he had to book annual leave in advance, and had only just read the email, and would book in advance in the future.

I didn't think any further disciplining him would improve his performance, only worsen. I couldn't make him respect me. Since the placement was short and he was producing useable but not great work, I thought the best bet was to ride it out.

Hes unpredictable and manipulative. The other employee has requested to work alone rather than with him despite being really enthusiastic to work with him at the start.[/quote]
I’ve managed people like this. It’s like being constantly gaslit at work. If you are someone who likes to be consensual and empathetic it’s even worse. Please don’t under any circumstances rehire him.

My advice, advertise including a desirable and essential criteria. When you create the JD and advert, create your selection criteria and use a points systemin a basic table. For example 5 points for exceeding your criteria, 1 for barely and obviously 0 for not. Be shrewd and on this state that the criterion must be referenced in supporting statements not reliant on cv or applications form.
Shortlist and try bloody hard to make sure he doesn't meet the cut. To cover yourself, get a colleague to also shortlist, but do it blindly without names etc on supporting statements. Then both sign your shortlists, date etc. And obviously you could positively discriminate towards disabled applicants too. Perhaps having a number in mind of how many you'd like to interview from the outset too.
This would at least show due process having taken place, when he complains and runs to cofounder.
Do your absolute to make it tgat he won't match or be shortlisted.
I wouldn't even mention the advert etc, making it so he has to be on the ball etc to see it.
I once went against my gut feeling as my colleague "liked" an applicant. It was a nightmare.
Also include a probation period, do monthly reviews, including setting targets etc. If you don't have any HR policies get some.

Set up an appraisal now at which you are completely honest: point out that he hasn't achieved the goals set, despite promises, that he is not performing in terms of teamwork either as his colleagues don't want to work with him, and that his misogyny is unacceptable also. When he goes into a huff or flounces out, tell him his employment is terminated.

I think you need to be far more detached from this. You need a work position filled, his work is not of the standard you need and he has had enough time to improve. However, your feedback on poor work in the future needs to be much more direct and constructive or people like this will just here the bit you liked.

Be clear on the job specification etc, set a task against a brief for those you interview and if he is as poor as you say he is there will be clear evidence that his work is not good enough.

Also to add...

I totally agree you need to clearly state essential criteria and give more points to these on application. It sounds like he won't get the points for interview anyway. And he might not even bother doing a proper application.

And while it's unfortunate he is struggling with money at the moment. He is not a pet you've adopted for life. He can move on and get an onother job. Whoever is best for the job (not him), will also have bills to pay. You can't be responsible for the financial wellbeing of everyone you've ever met.

@TheBlessedCheesemaker

Business owner here. Yes you probably should have done differently before, but you are here now and need to close this out. He applies. You respond formally with ‘thanks for the application but i won’t be progressing this to interview. I hope the experience that you have gained with us proves useful when you apply to other organisations. Once you have enriched your work experience through working in alternative companies you will be welcome to apply again’ Then engage no further with him in writing. If your industry is such that you MUST keep a good relationship then you may want to chat with him over zoom or something and say that you think his CV is great now but his skills needs more breadth and more depth than you feel your company can give him. And if he carries on pushing even after that, them be blunt and tell him he has a marmite effect on people which will hold him back and will only disappear when he gets more experience at working with a variety of different people And if he still pushes then you say what you mean by this is that, during his previous engagements in your company, he demonstrated a lack of respect on occasions, and a lack of ability to develop strong professional relationships and that this holds him back currently and he needs to build on this with experience gained by working with a variety of different personalities. If he carries on pushing tell him (very calmly and quietly, not shouty or in a ‘gotcha’ way) that it is exactly this continual pushing forward, rather than listening absorbing and understanding, that shows a lack of people skills, and this is what needs to be developed. And repeat that last bit on an infinite loop as necessary. Do not veer away from this, do not allow yourself to be drawn into giving specific examples. Tell your co-founder you can’t stand him and that you will not work with him again, and of.

This.

I don't think you need to overthink your essential criteria for the post- basic professionalism and responding to feedback are criteria he can't hit.

Treat the whole thing as good practice in dealing with toxic employees.

Don’t hire him. If you try and get rid of him at some point in the future, he may claim racism.

I own a business with a small team, and you can’t underestimate how much influence one toxic employee can have. When I have let the wrong people in previously, it has changed the whole atmosphere and made what is usually a positive, easy-going and friendly environment become very difficult to work in comfortably.
I’m much more careful now. The advice from @TheBlessedCheesemaker is perfect, I’m going to save it myself to refer back to!

If there is one thing I have earned in business its to go with my "gut" feeling.

A friend of mine interviewed two applicants for a junior position. Both equally well qualified. Female applicant had the slight lead. After the interviews he asked his secretary of many years for her impressions. She reported that the young male had been pleasant and polite while he waited. The young female had flounced out of the office into the street when she learned she could not smoke there. Consequently she was a few minutes late going into the interview.

Guess who got the job?

If someone gets into a tizz and shows their temper at interview stage and is unpleasant to the workmates in a small office what are they going to be like if you employ them and they get their feet under the table!

I've just noticed the bit where you say someone in the team has asked not to work with him. It would be massively risky to employ him if he can't fit in with such as all team to this extent.

I don't agree with the advice for you not to do the shortlisting. All you need to do is keep clear records of how you scored and why and be able to justify the criteria you set. It might be useful to find to find some adverts for similar roles and review their job descriptions as I think asking for a number of years experience is becoming less common.

Do not ignore your experience and instinct here he has given more than enough reason for not employing him- going AWOL and ignoring instructions on how to improve his work to an acceptable standard are plenty.

Sounds like he is some sort of content writer/ designer. In this case, if his written work is sloppy, that simply isn't good enough and doesn't meet the requirements for the role. He was taken on as a temp to keep things ticking over but did not make a good impression and you do not owe him anything.

Don't engage further. Tell him he is welcome to apply, as is anyone, but the permanent candidate will need more experience/ skills so he should apply for other jobs in the meantime. If he pushes, do as a PP says and let him know that is not behaviour that makes him appear a suitable permanent candidate for your company.

Due to Corona, there are a lot of good people looking for jobs right now so you should get a good field. I would tweak the job spec and level to exclude him if you can (without going back 4 pages I'm not sure if it is already posted) just to avoid interviewing him if necessary.

In future, your appraisals need to be clearer. I understand from your OP that his work was not satisfactory however if I was a thick skinned sort, I would read your feedback as an overall positive review. If you'd been clearer and laid out the areas for improvement rather than in the middle of a shit sandwich to save his feelings, you would have stronger evidence to show your partner.

As it stands, I think you need to get her up to speed with how much he is harassing you (I don't mean in a legal sense but it is inappropriate to try and force a hiring manager's hand), and how far he fell short of expectations. Let her know you understand they are friends and that is fine, but he is not suitable for the job, so you need to be united so she is not giving him false hope or encouraging him to persevere.

I'm not really sure why people are at pains to point out setting essential and desirable criteria for the job and assigning scores to each application to 'prove' he isn't a suitable candidate.

This is a small business not a global corporate. You don't have to provide any evidence to him that he is not suitable. The person who gets the job is the one who is a better fit in terms of experience and qualifications.

I've missed out on jobs before. When I've seen the successful candidate's LinkedIn profile they have often had less experience than me. I just accept that my face didn't fit for that particular opportunity. As a candidate, there isn't an awful lot you can do about it!

Can you hire in a HR specialist just to run the interviews for you or perhaps ask another business person you know with experience to sit in on them. That way you can get a level of backup from outside sources while also ensuring that all procedures have been adhered to.

Advertise the role tell him he is welcome to apply but mention you are really looking for someone with more experience or x , y . Z.
Then don't hire him , thats business.

OP please think about your approach to people management. You entire post shows a shrinking violet, cloak and dagger approach to managing performance. How will people improve if you don’t tell them how they are doing and what they should be doing differently. Transparency and measurable goals with timescales are essential, why are you shying away from this?

OP please think about your approach to people management. You entire post shows a shrinking violet, cloak and dagger approach to managing performance. How will people improve if you don’t tell them how they are doing and what they should be doing differently.

I agree. You have to be much more hard headed in business. As other posters have pointed out there are many skilled and experienced people seeking work at the moment so employers can afford to be extra choosy.

There are also many people suffering financially. You do not owe it to anyone to consider their financial circumstances when you employ them.

You need to get your managers hat on and select the applicant who is the best fit for your company and the team you already have in place.

HRTFT but don't take him on and make sure you have documented everything. Start pulling him up and documenting it. Can you outsource first interviews so that it is less personal?

@LaurieFairyCake

Don't interview

Don't hire

Don't respond to his emails

Don't take his calls

Tell your business partner what you said here - he ignores clearly set out written expectations and didn't REQUEST annual leave but said he was taking it and just took it even though you said he couldn't

STOP THINKING YOU OWE HIM ANYTHING

This.

If you value your business you will do the above.
You owe him nothing.

If you go against your gut and hire someone you know is a disaster, you don't deserve for your business to prosper.

Your partner will have every right to blame YOU when things go badly wrong because you felt intimidated into hiring someone who was not a good fit.

You are over thinking this.

Tell your colleague he is not suitable.
End of.
If she challenges it, you can ask her does SHE want to take responsibility for hiring someone you believe would be a completely wrong fit.

You sound both intimated and nervous of him.

Step away from this.
You do not owe him a job.
End of.

Block him but all you have to say is "He/you are not what we are looking for".
On a loop.

He has the capacity to bring mayhem to your business.
Why would you consider doing that for someone you owe absolutely nothing too.

Get assertiveness training as a priority or your business could be impacted.

Do not hire him. Something similar happened in a company I once worked in. Employee and co-owner became allies and bullied the other owner to the extent she had a nervous breakdown and quit. He went on to becoming co-owner. Got in a relationship with the original co-owner, married her and fully took over the business. He was a master manipulator, champion gaslighter, etc. It all ended very badly. Trust your gut instinct.

I'm not really sure why people are at pains to point out setting essential and desirable criteria for the job and assigning scores to each application to 'prove' he isn't a suitable candidate.

Toxic people, like the one OP describes, do not let things go easily. By having clear criteria by which you can back up your decision not to allow them into the shortlisting process helps cut off one area of 'attack'. He will pressure and try and get his foot in the door, but by being able to say he didn't meet the minimum criteria, helps cut of various avenues he could use to get his foot in the door. I used to work in recruitment, believe me, they try everything.

Don't shortlist him for interview - you don't want him so what's the point?

Given that the team only comprises 4 people, 1 individual makes up 25% of the workforce - that's a large % to have a "bad fit".

He's trying to wheedle his way in via your co-founder - don't let him.

The other employee has requested to work alone rather than with him despite being really enthusiastic to work with him at the start.

Don't hire him. You'll lose good people and end up with him. Is that what you want? He will sour your entire company and since it consists of 4 people, it could fold completely.

People have given you great advice on here on how to deal with him. I would take that advice and ditch him.

Nothing more to add really, except I have noticed that you say that your "gut instinct" is not to trust him but then you have provided a list of objective reasons not to hire him.

Listen to your gut by all means, but use these to explain to your partner (or indeed the guy himself if he asks) why you won't be hiring him.

And look at the ACAS website for courses on how.to manage people. I recommend particularly Managing Conflict and Having Difficult Conversations.

I would advertise it with some fairly hefty ‘essential criteria’ such as particular skills or experience. Then tell him he is welcome to apply but he’ll be up against other candidates. Then you put a really robust interview process together and address in particular some of the areas of concern you have during the interview. Perhaps use an assessment also.
Good luck!

Bloody hell, I know you don’t want criticism about how you’re handling this, but ffs! Stop hiring him back, don’t give him the permanent job whatever you do. Tell him there was a strong field of candidates and you’ve hired someone who will respond well to constructive criticism as he clearly doesn’t!