One key worker, child should stay home

[Areyouactuallyseriousrightnow]

Not sure if there has already been a thread but AIBU to think that if only one parent is key worker and other is WFH, child should be staying home as school provision is for key workers who cannot complete their important role if they have to look after child at home, not so that the other parent can continue with work without interruption?

My partner is a key worker, but I don’t consider us eligible as I am home and therefore technically can be with the children.

YABU- if there’s one key worker take that opportunity to send the child in.
YANBU- if there’s another parent at home, child should stay home.

That’s surprising, do certain employers think this lockdown is magically different to the last one. Anecdotal experience of those I’ve spoken to us that their employers have been equally if not more sympathetic this time around, as everyone has a better understanding of what this entails for parents. Shame if not the case elsewhere.
Are parents having the conversation or are too worried about job security to raise it I wonder?

@JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows

JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows - I cannot do my job whilst sensibly supervising a 3 year old and one year old. It is not fair on them nor my employer. I cannot take calls nor undertake technical work without leaving them unsupervised which isn't going to happen. I did not say I was too special to work at home with the children present. I simply cannot do both so something has to give. My job of 11 years and masters degree would of course be sacrificed it's just quite upsetting to have to chuck it all

The vast majority of people "can't" do their job WFH whilst helping their kids with school work.

Thing is what you mean isn't that you're physically incapable, it's just very difficult. Well, tough. It's difficult for everyone. So you need to speak to your employer about easing the strain - not making it a teacher's problem. If too many children are unnecessarily in school then the virus will continue to spread at the rates we've seen, bubbles will close meaning doctors, police, nurses etc won't be able to work (you could WFH though) putting a huge strain on our key services. Sorry but if you can WFH your children belong at home with you. Middle through like everyone else. If you do you'll be muddling for a far shorter time.

Yes, this - well said. We're really struggling with it too - as are most working parents - but hadn't considered sending DD in. DH will soon be busy giving online (and seemingly some in person!) classes to uni students which mean he's locked away in his office for hours, I am in a job which I can't just abandon during the day with meetings etc, and so only child DD is going to suffer. It pisses me off to see people abusing the setup. I don't want this situation prolonged because of selfish people.

Some secondary heads are actually inviting more kids in, so not Keyworker or classed as vulnerable but those who didn’t access learning well last time.

ElsaSchraeder jobs differ- hugely.

WHY are people Wfh Sending their teenagers in?! What on Earth do they need you for? They are old enough to work independently! Unless they have additional needs but if they don't then keep them at home and have them work in their rooms.

[quote Schoolmummmy]@Ritasueandbobtoo9 - WFH with small children, is not possible for most people! But unless it’s a ‘critical for the country’ role, held by both parents, then the rest of us should be scaling back or juggling it between us. It should be a discussion with your employer time, not let’s bend the rules to suit our needs time. It’s a farce that everyone is jumping on the bandwagon, and I’m sick of the excuses. Oh Johnny is much happier when he’s not stuck at home all day..well guess what? All our kids aren’t happy being stuck at home all day![/quote]
Yep.

I also never knew so many MNers had high powered husbands who can't possibly work with other humans flitting around. However do they manage in an office?!

All I'll say is anyone sending their kids in when they're WFH - don't moan when restrictions aren't lifted come February. You wanna be selfish, then accept the consequences of that selfishness.

Amazed that on another thread on here only the other day a mum on mat leave was hauled over hot coals for leaving an 18 month old unattended (in front of the tv) for 15 minutes to have a shower, because it's a 'safeguarding issue'. Yet people here advocating leaving a one year old baby and 3yo to their own devices for much longer than tha

Erm, who suggested that?
It's possible to work in the same room where your children are watching TV.

Or the person in question could send their child to a nursery, which are still open. So not really a problem is it

Absolutely. This lockdown will be lifted much much more slowly if everyone puts themselves first instead of the greater good. Why aren’t we all in this together!

Why are so many people moaning about their one year olds and three year olds?? The nurseries are OPEN. This is about school age children, and people who seem to think that their jobs somehow require more attention and focus than others..so they are flexing the rules to help themselves. I know too many one parent key worker and both wfh, and one key worker and SAHM...sending their kids into school!! And the excuses are just pathetic. Oh my job demands so much blah blah whatever..as if our stressful jobs don’t demand our time too?? Or Johnny just can’t cope at home...he neeeds company. Yes we all do. Or kids do too. I’m sick of it. It’s selfish and needs to be stopped, or rates of transmission in the community, will simply carry on being sustained..at some level.

[quote Pinetreesfall]@JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows
Thanks, my children are at nursery and will continue to have a place - they are remaining open. My DH is a keyworker outside the home so we cannot juggle through together. My 12 year old is currently doing live lessons and I will continue to work. If I don't work who supports us? Government sure as hell won't.[/quote]
But why wouldn't you work - your little ones are in nursery and your older child is old enough to work on their own

This is just this weeks stick to beat people with... there's been half a dozen threads on it AT LEAST. Why wouldn't you want the best for your child (which is to be in school) if you possibly could? But let's just pile on even more guilt on top of this shit situation? It seems that this a pure jealousy which is perfectly understandable but at least own it

I work at a school so have sent my DS to primary but have left me Year 7 and Year 9 at home as I think they are safer, they don’t want to be at school so that’s my threat, Log in on time do all your online learning or you’ll have to go to school.

Just because you "may" send your child to school, doesn't mean you "must". It seems reasonable to keep your child at home if you can, thereby freeing up space for those who have no choice. Bear in mind that teachers are not only teaching those children physically present, but are also providing support for others who are being virtually schooled. Anything you can do to lessen the pressure on them, and the contact they have with others, will be appreciated.

@NCstaythefuckathome

Absolutely. This lockdown will be lifted much much more slowly if everyone puts themselves first instead of the greater good. Why aren’t we all in this together!

Because "I'm alright Jack".

I've delivered 3 PSHE lessons (so lots of discussion required) this morning to secondary pupils whilst my 8yo and 5yo (on pain of death) have sat opposite me doing their school work. It was tough - although gave my lovely pupils a good giggle when DS said "mummy I need a poo" - but I planned little breakout sessions for moments like this so I could nip away for a few minutes. Everyone has survived. I haven't done my job as well as I'd like because quite simply virtual learning is a PITA but c'est la vie.

I'm actually getting angrier I think I probably need to step away from this thread. I want life to return to normal - others seemingly think they're too important to contribute to returning to normality.

@Blackberrybunnet

Just because you "may" send your child to school, doesn't mean you "must". It seems reasonable to keep your child at home if you can, thereby freeing up space for those who have no choice. Bear in mind that teachers are not only teaching those children physically present, but are also providing support for others who are being virtually schooled. Anything you can do to lessen the pressure on them, and the contact they have with others, will be appreciated.

Isn't that the schools decision? They'll have worked out how many kids they can take.. if there's too many they'll tighten the criteria? Ie both key worker parents not one etc?

@jerrywesterby

This is just this weeks stick to beat people with... there's been half a dozen threads on it AT LEAST. Why wouldn't you want the best for your child (which is to be in school) if you possibly could? But let's just pile on even more guilt on top of this shit situation? It seems that this a pure jealousy which is perfectly understandable but at least own it

Children are getting childcare in school not education.

If people wanted the best for their child then they'd do everything they could to reduce transmission so schools can open quicker.

People SHOULD feel guilty about sending their school aged kids in when they're perfectly able to stay at home.

The WFH parent might be unable to home school or supervise young kids. They might be in meetings all day. They might be the main earner.

The keyworker parent may have to give up their low paid job in order to look after kids and home school. Maybe he/she is a hospital cleaner or nursing assistant or another profession in great demand by the NHS right now.

There are some really unpleasant people on this thread.

I'm technically a key worker, able and willing to wfh, and have got a place for my youngest daughter in school. I'm a single parent. My teens are all home doing their home learning.

I'm pleased and happy to take up a place. I didn't last time. It's none of anyone else's business that I've done this. or even why.

My colleague who works for the same organisation as me has also got a place for her daughter in her school. She's got a partner.

Children are getting childcare in school not education.

Not the case everywhere. My DS is getting taught by his usual teacher and it has been made clear that it is education.
The education side of it has been taken far more seriously this time. Those participating in home learning have been told they need to complete the same tasks as those in school.

@JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows The last lockdown was childcare only for key worker childcare. This time they are being taught the curriculum.

@HikeForward sorry but unless you have additional needs or a disability no one physically "can't" look after kids when working, they just find it hard. It's not the same thing

@Ramdogs remotely, yesC but for the most part key worker provision is child care only.

@GloriaSass sorry but that's massively selfish, especially your colleague.

@JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows no I'm planning ahead. There are calls for nurseries to close too. Who knows if it will happen.
A bit of forward planning never hurt anyone.

@Pinetreesfall BTW apologies as I forgot when I made the last post to you that your children were nursery aged 🤦🏼‍♀️ in which case it didn't apply to you specifically.

I don't agree with the call to close nurseries, exactly for the reasons that it isn't safe to work at home with babies.

[quote JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows]@HikeForward sorry but unless you have additional needs or a disability no one physically "can't" look after kids when working, they just find it hard. It's not the same thing[/quote]
Can you tell me how I can look after a 6 year old while delivering lectures which last hours...one that doesn't involve hours of neglect??

Not all jobs are the same. Some can be done with a small child in the room , others can't. it's not that hard to understand.

Choosing to send your child to school instead of neglecting them is not selfish.