One key worker, child should stay home

[Areyouactuallyseriousrightnow]

Not sure if there has already been a thread but AIBU to think that if only one parent is key worker and other is WFH, child should be staying home as school provision is for key workers who cannot complete their important role if they have to look after child at home, not so that the other parent can continue with work without interruption?

My partner is a key worker, but I don’t consider us eligible as I am home and therefore technically can be with the children.

YABU- if there’s one key worker take that opportunity to send the child in.
YANBU- if there’s another parent at home, child should stay home.

@Jellycatspyjamas I’m in exactly the same position. My husband is the full time earner in a fairly senior position and whose job would be in danger if not available to work. We can’t afford for him to lose it. I’m a part time doctor and had to give up my job temporarily last time as school were completely inflexible about the policy. I’m sitting here worried that I won’t be able to work again soon...

Yes, in the end a lot of schools had far less kids in than they were expecting I think last time, so there can't have been that many 'piss takers'.

My DH is a keyworker who has had three days off this Christmas (25, 26 and New Year's Day, worked every other day, including 9am until after midnight on December 30 and will be going back to working 14 hour days, absolute minimum, from Monday. If education places offer keyworker spaces for only one parent, I'll take it. I fully support his work and all key workers but the impact on our family and my mental health is immense.

He doesn't have time to cook, clean, eat properly, exercise or put our DC to bed, for months on end. I work full time too and was furloughed in the first lockdown for childcare. I don't think I'm taking the piss by sending DC in. If I burn out, he has to take over and that would mean he can't do his work. He is a brilliant and dedicated dad, and more than pulls his weight in usual times but his work is basically never ending during this pandemic.

Working from home and taking care of kids at the same time is often very difficult/impossible. Working from home means working, not being available for childcare (unless you work flexible hours)

If the school say DD can have a place I'll take it, if they say we would both need to be keyworkers I'll understand.

I'm a key worker, my husband isn't. We sent ours in 1-2 days a week in the last lock down as my husbands job was exceptionally difficult to do with young kids at home. Then in the last 12 weeks they've been sent home from school for 6 out of the 12 weeks. Im now seriously considering leaving my patient facing role in a critical service as we can't sustain the situation - I'm passionate about what I do but my husbands job is at risk with the constant disruptions kids bring and he earns far more than me. Also I know I know I can walk into a job at the end of this with the high NHS vacancies but it won't be so easy for him.

@Dishwashersaurous I know several who are doing that, that’s why I asked.
I completely understand about the situation where key worker is lower paid or other parent is not able to home school.
Didn’t consider it as it’s not the case in any of the instances I’ve been told about here, but I am very sympathetic to that situation .

All those saying wfh and look after kids at the same time.

Even though I am at home I am working absolutely flat out every second of the day. I don’t have time for lunch and barely manage a toilet break let alone supervisor of young infant children

Stop judging people and let the schools interpret the guidelines as they see fit. They're hardly going to consult you are they? If people are taking the piss (it was opposite last time in our school - hardly any keyworker kids in despite hundreds eligible) then the school can deal with it.

@Plonkyplink we are in exactly the same position. Moved in with family for first lockdown for childcare help but if children can't access childcare this time, my desperately understaffed hospital (due to staff covid sickness and isolation) will sadly be managing without me.

Sad reality is his job pays mortgage and bills, mine doesn't come close no matter how valuable it may be to society in a pandemic. Many others I work with in same boat too

Hmm. I’m a hospital doctor and husband not key worker. In first lockdown we didn’t have choice as no keyworker school (small school, poor infrastructure) and so my husband did it all whilst WFH. Only he had nobody to help between zoom calls and dd Y1 couldn’t work unsupervised so mostly spent time playing outside or watching TV. He really tried but frequently derailed so lots of started but not finished tasks. I then would get home shattered/broken and then we’d try and do an hour of schoolwork etc when we’d all finished our days. So child doing work at 7pm, total meltdown. A couple WFH can at least try some daytime sharing. It made me think we should support keyworker families and single parents: basically if trying to work and home learning falls to one person they need some help. Agree there are pisstakers but this shouldn’t be a race to the bottom.

Our council is both keyworker parents only to the school hub.
If only one is a keyworker the other parent has to take care of child.
But the keyworker list is far to long it’s ridiculous. How can sales at sky tv be classed as a keyworker

What if there is one key worker parent and one self employed parent who cannot wfh?

My boss was in this position last time and it really affected our company.
His children didn't get places but his wife is a key worker and he had to try and juggle managing a company while home schooling two children.
We are a very small company so it had a huge impact.
I don't know what the answer is, as if it were a temporary solution for a set number of weeks then it'd work, but the uncertainly of it all is what causes the difficulty

@Manteo

If the school say DD can have a place I'll take it, if they say we would both need to be keyworkers I'll understand.

Yes same here.

I'm not going to give up a keyworker place that the school are offering, and which would help us OK, my DH mainly! immensely, out of some sort of misplaced 'solidarity' which won't actually help other parents anyway.

If we don't get a place this time then it is what it is.

In last lockdown my partner had to work with our two at home (4 and 5), they had the tv, had lots of snacks and a lot of the time had to be left to their own devices. I assume this was the case for many people! I’m a key worker snd was out of the house. It was hard on all of us and I felt that I had to make it up to the children once home so struggled to get housework done.

Lucky people get to wfh even if children are running riot in background. Think of all those none keywords who can't work from home so have had to leave work. Yes if 1 parent is at home they should have the children their one less child in school is one less spreader of the virus.

Last time, my child’s nursery would only allow children of 2 KW’s, or 1 KW single parent family attend.

My DH is a KW working outside the home (NHS). I’m not a KW but wfh 30 hours a week. So my DS was home and couldn’t go to nursery.

It actually would have been much, much easier if my DH wasn’t a KW and was wfh with me. Then we could have tag teamed, shared the childcare load and taken turns to work. Instead, it all fell to me and I near enough had a nervous breakdown.

The implication that those who have a parent working from home have it “easier” is just offensive and so incorrect.

And remember vulnerable children and those with echp are also eligible.

So actually it may have nothing to do with the parents status as to why certain children are attending school!

YANBU. I am a single parent, not a key worker and I cannot work from home. I'm expected to manage somehow though as my child isn't allowed to attend school if they're closed. Everyone else who works from home in non key worker roles is also expected to just manage.

@Timeturnerplease I'm a single parent and I can't work from home but as a non key worker I'm expected to just manage somehow.

It should be two keyworkers only per household , no ifs or buts. Plenty people are having to take unpaid leave. Shouldn’t be any different if your on a 6 figure salary or a minimum wage job. Just because your on a high salary dosent make you any different. Obviously single parents are different.

Yanbu

The point of shutting schools is to have a few children as possible.

Those saying I can't complete my job from home if children are there - how is this any different from someone who's job happens to not fall under they key worker guidance?

It must be better for the mental health of all children to go in but having a key worker parent doesn't mean your child's mental health is more important.

Shit for everyone but it's the way it is.

We are eligible for a space in school and I’m a SAHP.
Seriously. We qualify. I won’t be taking it though (wouldn’t be able to look the teachers in the eye).
The reason we are eligible is because of my DH’s role. Our school only requires one parent and doesn’t add any assessment to what the other parent is doing - SAHP/WFH etc.
Crazy.

As the lower earner/keyworker I would be in the position that i would stay home and dh would work. The whole point is to enable keyworkers to go in and do their job. How have you an issue with this?
Through lockdown I was working every hour I could to cover and prevent mixing of staff teams. School was there when needed.