DS’s school to teach abstinence education

[Childsschool128]

DS goes to a normal state school but they have sent home a letter saying that their sex ed they will be teaching from next term will include:
-the benefits of having one lifelong monogamous partnership
-the risks of contraceptives
-the dangers of unprotected sex
-the benefits of not having sex in teenage years
-the health risks of sexual promiscuity.
DS is 15 (year 10) and there has never been any indication they were anything other than mainstream in the past. Is this really what is taught in UK schools nowadays DS is my eldest so I have never had to deal with anything like this before.

sounds pretty thorough and reasonable to me, especially if it's a multi cultural school with parents from a range of religions.

"Risks of contraception", I would interpret to include showing pupils the correct way to use condoms, and warning them about ways that carelessness can make them ineffective contraceptives.. Also, pointing out "the risk" of injection, coil and Pill methods of contraception. Which is that they offer no protection whatever against STI's .

In "health risks" of promiscuity, and "benefits of not having sex " I would hope they include the mental health effects of social, peer and media pressure on vulnerable youngsters self esteem. Saying no (how and when) and listening to "No".

I was teaching the above several decades ago, so its hardly groundbreaking,

The ideal of one monogamous relationship was pushed when I was a young woman and all it meant was that young women married men who often made terrible partners or stayed with partners they should have left because they were meant to be the one because they had sex with them.

We had two speakers who came to our high school and lectured us on how we shouldn't do things that we mightn't be able to live with later. We were a bit baffled because we couldnt work out if they were talking about sex or drugs. There was no idea that you could "forgive" yourself and move on rather than "not being able to live with yourself". I think these speakers were dangerous and very naive.

And actually it was the sweet Christian girl in our year who was saving herself for marriage who got pregnant which we were pretty surprised about.

@covidaintacrime www.gov.uk/government/publications/relationships-education-relationships-and-sex-education-rse-and-health-education

the benefits of having one lifelong monogamous partnership

This is a terrible one to ‘teach’ to impressionable teens for SO MANY REASONS 🤦🏻‍♀️....

Abusive relationships
Literally being like Charlotte from SATC obsessive about finding ‘the one’
Unhappy marriages

I could add more if I wasn’t so shocked! If this was my daughters school I’d be writing a very carefully worded email ASAP.

Is it a religious school??

Perhaps it should be rephrased to place the emphasis on the benefits of a lifelong happy and respectful monogamous relationship.

Tbh this sounds really good this should be standard sex Ed nationally with a few tweaks of course.

@FrostedCranberries

Is that not a good thing? Make abstinence cool. Kids were bullied for being virgins at 16 in my day (late 2000's).

^^

I agree with abstinence.

I have never met anyone in real life who said "I wish I had sex earlier as a teenager". Nothing wrong with teaching the benefits of abstinence and nothing wrong with teens waiting a few years.

@XelaM

I have never met anyone in real life who said "I wish I had sex earlier as a teenager". Nothing wrong with teaching the benefits of abstinence and nothing wrong with teens waiting a few years.

I personally believe in abstinence until marriage. But 100% there is very little benefit to it so sex Ed should reflect that

@Blacktothepink

Perhaps Boris Johnson should practice what he’s preaching

What do you mean?

Do you know who made this decision @Childsschool128 and why it was made? It's good practice to widely consult with parents, pupils and the community. At the very least their curriculum should be based on the DfE guidance. You have every right to voice your thoughts on this. I'd be demanding a meeting with the PSHE leader at least.

Er, what?

I’d be writing to Ofsted and the Department of a Education - has the school been taken over by a mad evangelical religious Academy chain?

Tell the school you don’t agree with this message and that you won’t allow DS to attend.

@VestaTilley

Er, what?

I’d be writing to Ofsted and the Department of a Education - has the school been taken over by a mad evangelical religious Academy chain?

Tell the school you don’t agree with this message and that you won’t allow DS to attend.

Is anything they are teaching illegal/against guidelines?

This is a terrible one to ‘teach’ to impressionable teens for SO MANY REASONS

I don’t agree. I would only have an issue if it was some religious thing, but it’s a fine thing to promote as long as they are taught what a healthy relationship looks like.

@VestaTilley

Er, what?

I’d be writing to Ofsted and the Department of a Education - has the school been taken over by a mad evangelical religious Academy chain?

Tell the school you don’t agree with this message and that you won’t allow DS to attend.

@XelaM

I have never met anyone in real life who said "I wish I had sex earlier as a teenager". Nothing wrong with teaching the benefits of abstinence and nothing wrong with teens waiting a few years.

Yes, it's a sensible stance. A bit of self control. Our society has become instant gratification based

@VestaTilley

Er, what?

I’d be writing to Ofsted and the Department of a Education - has the school been taken over by a mad evangelical religious Academy chain?

Tell the school you don’t agree with this message and that you won’t allow DS to attend.

Please don’t do that op that would be totally daft.

@XelaM

I have never met anyone in real life who said "I wish I had sex earlier as a teenager". Nothing wrong with teaching the benefits of abstinence and nothing wrong with teens waiting a few years.

Sadly I think this isn’t remembered in modern day sex Ed

What exactly is wrong with any of that scheme's content. There are dangers- physical and mental to sex when you are not ready for it, contraception doesn't ways work and teens should know about different types, even religious schools teach this, what's wrong with teaching that people have different perspectives and that abstinence is one of those- abstinence isn't teaching that sex is wrong , rather that it is very personal and you decide when you are ready- fully informed free consent . What are the disadvantages of not having sex in early teens?-it's a marathon not a sprint. they may teach a heavy respect for the body, free choice and that sex is great but why rush it.

healthy not heavy :)

It sounds exactly like the sex education I had in 1970. It didn't work.

Yes however cool some parents may want to be there is literally no benefit to premature sex

@CaptainMyCaptain

It sounds exactly like the sex education I had in 1970. It didn't work.

Why do you think it didn’t work?