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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Outside walks and people

455 replies

CharlotteRose90 · 01/01/2021 15:54

No hate please but I’m hoping I’m not the only one.

So me and my mum have been going for walks with the dog and it’s making me so angry what people are doing. Walking so close to us and not keeping distance. We’re both in the vulnerable category and I’ve said so many times to people to move away.

I completely get you don’t have to wear a mask but don’t walk next to or behind people you don’t know. The park we choose today had a massive path and people still did it. I ended up shouting at this woman for standing next to my mum and coughing.

Rant over. I’m hoping I’m not crazy

OP posts:
Bookworming · 03/01/2021 06:25

But it’s also not acceptable that people do t turn their Brian’s on and follow the rules

That's Brian @Ddot ! @Justa47 wants him on walks as a Marshall I assume! GrinGrinGrin

Justa47 · 03/01/2021 06:28

@Bookworming

Jeez I hope your New Years resolution is to go and seek help to check you are ok?

I hope so for your sake. You can’t help yourself.

Bookworming · 03/01/2021 06:31

To remind you @Justa47 you tagged me twice on a separate post?

You wanted, seeker and got my attention. You then start playing the victim? And you think I need to seek help?

camelfinger · 03/01/2021 06:38

I get slightly peeved as a much-maligned runner that I’m the one who has to move out the way of the large groups walking at a snail’s pace who would not consider going single file. I don’t get too het up about it but I’m actually doing exercise when I think that many others are just using it as an excuse to have a chat. I try to go out when it’s pissing down with rain or when it’s windy. Oddly enough not many people seem bothered about exercising then!

Justa47 · 03/01/2021 06:47

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Bookworming · 03/01/2021 07:00

@Justa47 stop tagging me! You're describing yourself! You sought me out! Stop it!

Stop playing the victim! It's weird and boring and defines you.

If you don't want to interact with me, then don't come on posts tagging me to bait an argument!

I cannot believe you're blaming me for responding to you, do you expect people to just bow down to you because you've decided they should just take your nonsense or you'll cry "abuse".

Ddot · 03/01/2021 07:00

Wow can both just stop, go have a cuppa and b r e a t h e

Justa47 · 03/01/2021 07:04

@Bookwormiyou found me again.
And you couldn’t stop.

I am very worried for you well being

Please be safe and I recommend seeking advice. Just to be sure you are ok.

Catscatsandmorecats · 03/01/2021 07:49

OP YANBU I cannot believe the replies and responses on here. So many entitled people with a 'well I'm alright' attitude. We are all supposed to be socially distancing at all times. Yes, the virus spreads less outside, but also there's a new far more contagious strain.

If no one else makes an effort to distance/let others past then the OP will be getting nowhere on her walks, she will be constantly having to dive off the path and wait. She did not say she's expecting everyone else to move out of her way, she's annoyed that no one is even making an effort. It's not even about who is following the rules or not, it's about who is courteous and polite to others. Even before covid there were groups of runners/walkers/cyclists/horse riders who would not go single file to let someone more vulnerable past without moving into the road/hedge/ditch. Probably the same people who are entitled and rude drivers who always push in and never think to pull in/let someone out if it would be sensible or police to. Everyone is getting more and more selfish and precious about their daily exercise and that attitude seems to be reflected here. My elderly vulnerable Parents who are clearly elderly and less mobile are often having to go off path onto less stable ground to let unthinking groups past in the woods they live next to which have never been busy before now. Sadly judging by people's attitudes on here no one actually gives a shit about distancing, if they are intimidating people or putting them in a dangerous position.

MrsDThomas · 03/01/2021 07:58

I took the kids for a 4 mile Walk on a cycle path in town yesterday after being shopping. It was very busy, dogs/prams/bikes/runners. But people were sensible. Single file, walking on the left when passing -like It was well before covid. And no one shouted at.

But one woman we noticed from afar went up a bank to avoid people. When we approached she went up the bank to avoid us.

Jesus fucking Christ. That us being ridiculous. Imagine the walk she had, up and down up and down a boggy, muddy bank. She really should have stayed in or gone elsewhere.

fiveoldteddies · 03/01/2021 07:59

Yeah but sometimes it's difficult to move/stand aside (hedge, nettles), so for a group of people to carry on walking side by side is a bit selfish. Worse when they stop and block the path. They may be in the minority but irritating when it happens.

piscis · 03/01/2021 08:08

Shouting is rude and actually is a very effective way to spread viruses.

In terms of concerns about catching covid, I would be more worried if someone was shouting at me that if they were a bit too close to me in the park to be honest, so maybe you are not very considerate either.

annevonkleve · 03/01/2021 08:13

@fiveoldteddies

Yeah but sometimes it's difficult to move/stand aside (hedge, nettles), so for a group of people to carry on walking side by side is a bit selfish. Worse when they stop and block the path. They may be in the minority but irritating when it happens.
I'm not sure they are in the minority, it seems to happen all the time.

Yesterday I was crossing a narrow railway bridge and saw two runners coming so decided to wait for them. I then went over the bridge and there was a couple and dog coming along the wider part of the path. They'd decided that they would spread themselves across the path - there was a grass verge so I went on that but really, is it that hard to go single file and hold the dog to heel when someone is coming towards you?

I don't think it's a running thing because it happens when I am walking, too. I hope these people don't drive, because they seem to have no spatial awareness at all.

annevonkleve · 03/01/2021 08:16

@Edda09

I agree OP, and with the new variant spreading so much easier I reckon it means you can get it just from walking too close to people outside.
I am not sure about this, but it's probably easier to catch outside in a group when you are together for some time.

No dawdling from us at all we walk at a normal pace thanks

"normal" pace is dawdling. If you are out for exercise you need to get your heart-rate up and get a bit of a sweat on. Otherwise you are out for a gentle stroll, which is dawdling.

Justa47 · 03/01/2021 08:25

@Catscatsandmorecats

Agree. Everybody need to respect the rules and respect others distance

Skipsurvey · 03/01/2021 08:44

where i live, when you walk down the path, people go into the road to avoid each other.

OhYouBadBadKitten · 03/01/2021 08:55

My view is,that we all need to be able to get out and keep ourselves as mentally and physically healthy as possible. From a pragmatic point of view, that reduces the burden to the NHS in all its disciplines. From a humane view - surely we all want people to be as happy and healthy as they can be?

That means we are going to be sharing space with people who are really very vulnerable to the virus. It takes little effort to walk single file and move over where needed. For me it actually makes my walk more pleasurable - two humans passing, acknowledging and respecting each other. That's a shared moment of kindness.

Bookworming · 03/01/2021 09:13

Shouting is rude and actually is a very effective way to spread viruses.

Very very true! Good point.

EmmanuelleMakro · 03/01/2021 09:26

This thread reminds me of angry FB posts in the first lockdown when people specifically journeyed to parks etc to photograph other people who had done the same and post complaining that people were thronging to parks...If you don’t like being around other people then don’t go where people are lily uo be...

ClinkyMonkey · 03/01/2021 11:01

I agree wholeheartedly with OhYouBadBadKitten.

MessAllOver · 03/01/2021 11:29

This just doesn't track my experience at all. My experience is that most people are very, very nice and very, very reasonable. Maybe it's just where I live Confused.

I do find that some people aren't very good at getting out of other people's way. These people include:

  • Parents with multiple small children. Since they're not octopi, it takes them a little while to grab/bark orders at their spawn. Parents who also have a buggy have to one-handedly grab their walking children and manoeuvre them out the way while pushing the buggy single-handedly with their other hand.
  • Teens and pre-teens (especially in groups). Yes, they really should know better, but children aged between around 11 and 15 really seem to have no common sense or awareness of other people. They stand there like lemons, either embarrassed or oblivious. Around 15, they start to regain some common sense and manners. The only thing to do with this age group is bark "Move please - yes, you in the green jumper!" in your best loud teacher manner. This usually works.
  • Dog walkers with more than one dog. Same logistical problem as multiple children. One always seems to get wrapped round a tree while the other is heading in the opposite direction. I like dogs and don't want to see one strangled in front of me, so I'm usually tolerant.

On the other hand, I have no time for cyclists who cycle incredibly quickly down busy footpaths and get annoyed because my 2 yo didn't immediately jump out of their way when they rang their bell. I will grab him as quickly as possible so you can continue on your merry way, but please don't ride into him (and probably kill him) at 30mph just because it takes me a few seconds to pull him out of your path. Mostly men, this group.

Sup1979 · 03/01/2021 11:53

* This just doesn't track my experience at all. My experience is that most people are very, very nice and very, very reasonable. Maybe it's just where I live *

Same here.

I suspect some go around actively looking to be pissed off and angry. Seems such a shit way to live.

Bookworming · 03/01/2021 12:23

I suspect some go around actively looking to be pissed off and angry. Seems such a shit way to live.*

Absolutely! The COVID marshalls are out looking for issues! Just have your walk, honestly shouting at people who you've deemed to have "broken the rules". Some people are enjoying the excuse to be aggressive!

CountessFrog · 03/01/2021 12:27

The chance of contracting covid from walking past somebody in the outdoors is vanishingly small.

If you can’t cope with this risk, you should avoid going out, or hold your breath if somebody walks past.

Shouting at normal people who are able to balance the risk without becoming hysterical just makes you look more hysterical than you already are.

MilesJuppIsMyBitch · 03/01/2021 12:48

@NikeDeLaSwoosh

YABU

If you are the vulnerable ones, then you need to go somewhere remove where there are fewer people.

It’s really entitled to expect healthy people to give up even more of their liberty for someone making no effort at all to protect themselves.

Millions and millions of people have lost literally everything in an attempt to keep you ‘safe’. There needs to be at least some effort made from your side too.

Biscuit