Outside walks and people

[CharlotteRose90]

No hate please but I’m hoping I’m not the only one.

So me and my mum have been going for walks with the dog and it’s making me so angry what people are doing. Walking so close to us and not keeping distance. We’re both in the vulnerable category and I’ve said so many times to people to move away.

I completely get you don’t have to wear a mask but don’t walk next to or behind people you don’t know. The park we choose today had a massive path and people still did it. I ended up shouting at this woman for standing next to my mum and coughing.

Rant over. I’m hoping I’m not crazy

I shouldn't read threads like this - they're bad for my blood pressure. What sort of society have we become when people's answer to others asking for a bit of mutual consideration is that they should stay indoors, only go out at unsociable hours or drive for miles to the arsehole of nowhere? Lovely attitude.

I think you need to go out when it's less busy and manage your own anxieties by minimising the risk for yourself as much as possible. You are expecting other people to know you are vulnerable and they don't, so take control of the situation yourself and choose quieter times/places and move before people get in your space.

Please don't shout at other people. I can't tell you how sick I am of people behaving like this to each other. You may be anxious, but we all are. There is no excuse for rudeness and aggression.

Gosh! If your that upset about close encounters outside I can't even imagine how you cope in the supermarkets?! I'm not bothered about near misses outside, the fresh air and sunshine are literally the best things for ALL of us through the pandemic, I'd be more concerned about dogs getting too close (they are carriers too) they come significantly closer than people do. Seriously if your getting that mad you feel the need to shout at strangers about your safety, maybe you should do more to protect yourselves....maybe you could get a sword and wave around frantically to keep people at a decent distance? Or you could put on a high vis and write something bold and to the point "DON'T COME WITHIN SIX FOOT I'M VULNERABLE!" or "STAY BACK, I BITE"

Whatever you decide, please consider other people too, you're not the only people at risk, you're not the only people scared BUT there is only a very small number of people that are that self involved that they shout at people for something we're all experiencing. No one wants Covid but everyone is in their own world, dealing with things they're own way. If your way isn't working for you do things to make it work and don't take it out on other people...please :)

My elderly father was shouted at by someone the other day for looking at the newspapers, he was trying to read the front pages, he's partially sighted and a one minute task of seeing what paper to choose becomes a five minute task for him.... because he can't see! A pig ignorant woman screamed at him to hurry up and move because there is a pandemic and he shouldn't be stood there for so long spreading germs! I wasn't about to cause a scene in front of my toddler so I bit my tongue but this attitude towards other people because of their own fear of the virus is disgusting!! My father had every right to figure out which paper to buy and those people in the park have every right to be there.

Go at 6am the parks are pretty empty then :)

If covid was that easy to catch from crowded outdoor spaces then we all would have had it by now. Multiple times.

Or you could put on a high vis and write something bold and to the point "DON'T COME WITHIN SIX FOOT I'M VULNERABLE!" or "STAY BACK, I BITE"

OMG!! 😂😂😂😂

@ClinkyMonkey

I shouldn't read threads like this - they're bad for my blood pressure. What sort of society have we become when people's answer to others asking for a bit of mutual consideration is that they should stay indoors, only go out at unsociable hours or drive for miles to the arsehole of nowhere? Lovely attitude.

👏🏼 @ClinkyMonkey, I couldn’t agree more.

Do you eliminate all risk from your life? Having people walk briefly past you whilst outdoors is so low risk it’s laughable. I hope you don’t go anywhere near roads / in any moving transport etc etc etc

@JasmineandIsaiah

Gosh! If your that upset about close encounters outside I can't even imagine how you cope in the supermarkets?! I'm not bothered about near misses outside, the fresh air and sunshine are literally the best things for ALL of us through the pandemic, I'd be more concerned about dogs getting too close (they are carriers too) they come significantly closer than people do. Seriously if your getting that mad you feel the need to shout at strangers about your safety, maybe you should do more to protect yourselves....maybe you could get a sword and wave around frantically to keep people at a decent distance? Or you could put on a high vis and write something bold and to the point "DON'T COME WITHIN SIX FOOT I'M VULNERABLE!" or "STAY BACK, I BITE"

Whatever you decide, please consider other people too, you're not the only people at risk, you're not the only people scared BUT there is only a very small number of people that are that self involved that they shout at people for something we're all experiencing. No one wants Covid but everyone is in their own world, dealing with things they're own way. If your way isn't working for you do things to make it work and don't take it out on other people...please :)

My elderly father was shouted at by someone the other day for looking at the newspapers, he was trying to read the front pages, he's partially sighted and a one minute task of seeing what paper to choose becomes a five minute task for him.... because he can't see! A pig ignorant woman screamed at him to hurry up and move because there is a pandemic and he shouldn't be stood there for so long spreading germs! I wasn't about to cause a scene in front of my toddler so I bit my tongue but this attitude towards other people because of their own fear of the virus is disgusting!! My father had every right to figure out which paper to buy and those people in the park have every right to be there.

Go at 6am the parks are pretty empty then :)

The stay back I bite sign seems very appealing right now.

Btw I’m not bothered about supermarkets as where I go everyone wears masks and behave like decent people.

My mum is 73 ofcourse I am going to shout at a stupid inconsiderate lady for stopping next to her and then basically coughing on her. I shouted at one person that’s it. Carry on judging me but I did nothing wrong at all.

Why bother posting in AIBU, you clearly think you're not.

@KatherineJaneway

Why bother posting in AIBU, you clearly think you're not.

I posted in AiBU to ask if I was unreasonable in thinking people should be decent and keep space while out and about etc not to ask whether my shouting at the lady was justified.

How did the coughing situation happen? Just wondering why she ended up standing next to you as you were all waking

Walking

If people aren’t maintaining adequate distance you should definitely let them know. And, in my experience, most people do not do anything to try and maintain two metres distance. Infection rates are increasing because people won’t do the bare minimum.

People are either really bad at estimating risk, at estimating distance, and at estimating effort or they’re actively trying to spread this thing. Right now I’m assuming that people are bad at estimating, but the longer this goes on, the more I wonder.

We should call the scientists and tell them your view! Revolutionary! Turns out we've all been taking precautions for no reason! Woohoo

Not much point in that, they already know. According to the scientists, passing people on the street and in the park is not particularly risky at normal distances that people stand apart.

Insisting others do more than the science indicates is useful, and that they are jerks if they don't go along with this, is part of what is making so many people feel less than sympathetic. Even someone who wants everyone to be treated with consideration will balk when asked to do things that are performative rather than useful.

@KatherineJaneway

Why bother posting in AIBU, you clearly think you're not.

This branch should be renamed 'Tell Me I'm Right'

The new variant is loads more infectious, the truth is we don't know the impact on exposure times or whether it is still as low risk outdoors yet. We live in a fairly rural area, but lots more people walking on previously quiet routes. We just automatically move out of the way, or wait, as very few others do.

@Vitaminsss

How did the coughing situation happen? Just wondering why she ended up standing next to you as you were all waking

We were walking and then my dog decided to stop to have a wee so we stopped and stood to the side. This lady then proceeded to stop behind my mum. We weren’t in the way at all she just randomly stopped next to us. If it was a bench or whatever I’d understand but was just a random bit of the pathway. Ther was enough room for a car to pass us so she had room.

That’s weird, it’s almost like she did it on purpose. I think I’d be annoyed in that situation too

hoodathunkit
I find your posts on here very moving and also sensible and understanding of other people's frailties. I am sorry you live somewhere where it is so difficult to protect yourself, but am so glad there are people like you who think of others when out and about.
Keep safe and well.

I'm glad you took my reply with a pinch of salt (as intended) I'm not an asshole, I get why you're mad and concerned. We all are! I'm pretty sure that person didn't see your mother from across the park and think "she looks old and vunrable let's go cough on her" she was probably in her own world and didn't really even notice you until you shouted at her. Hence why I suggested a high vis.... ridiculous as it sounds, crazy times call for crazy solutions and if someone is walking around with their head in the clouds they are probably more likely to notice you're vunrable if you're bright yellow :) and if they don't you could always play them at their own game and cough when they get too close....it's a swift crowd mover!

Also in regards to the shops you're far more likely to catch the virus there than in the park, even with masks being worn, they are germ hotspots, there's no escaping the air inside....outside is fresh air and sunlight you're pretty safe, just don't get shouted at the saliva could go on your face or in your mouth and give you multiple different viruses.....So you saying you did nothing wrong is simply a matter of opinion, you verbally abused a woman for coughing and consequently spewed millions of your germs in her direction. If that's not a pot calling a kettle black I don't know what is 😂

ofcourse I am going to shout at a stupid inconsiderate lady for stopping next to her and then basically coughing on her. I shouted at one person that’s it. Carry on judging me but I did nothing wrong at all.

....in your opinion. However, that opinion isn't shared by hundreds on this thread. Shouting at someone is not a nice thing to do in any times. Shouting at someone, and then coming on here to complain that they got too close to you is hypocritical to say the least.

I disagree ClinkyMonkey. People aren't being unkind at all. They are explaining that everyone has the "right" to use the park. If the OP feels her mother and her need to be isolated, then they have the option - as I know plenty of people have worked out for themselves - to exercise at times that aren't so busy. No-one is telling her she has to. Most people are pointing out the risk of being near someone for a minute or two whilst you are walking in the fresh air is minuscule, but if she feels really vulnerable in that circumstance, then she has the option to avoid that circumstance. It isn't unkind at all.

I definitely appreciate people responses. Spoken to my family and We’ve decided that when we go out we’ll be wearing masks. Its free reign for all in the park and if people can’t abide by the 2 metre distance then I’ll need to protect my family. I’m definitely not going to stay at home why should I, I have just as much right as anyone. Times like this I miss my old rotty as no one came near us then 🤣🤣. I probably shouldn’t have shouted at the woman a few strong words would have been better but I can’t change it.

The parks near me are absolutely heaving. It’s the only place people can go so of course they are full. There isn’t space to step away from people coming towards you without going into the grass, which currently is ankle deep bog due to all the rain.

OP may I ask were you on the path? If so then there’s your answer - don a pair of wellies and go through the muddiest bits instead, you’ll find you have much more space. Or if that isn’t possible then find some quiet residential backstreets to walk in instead. Parks are full, it’s nobody’s fault just sheer weight of numbers and nowhere else to go.

The cough - yes that seems thoughtless but coughing is involuntary, if she’d just inhaled a fly or swallowed the wrong way or something, she probably didn’t have much choice about where and when to cough!

@minipie

The parks near me are absolutely heaving. It’s the only place people can go so of course they are full. There isn’t space to step away from people coming towards you without going into the grass, which currently is ankle deep bog due to all the rain.

OP may I ask were you on the path? If so then there’s your answer - don a pair of wellies and go through the muddiest bits instead, you’ll find you have much more space. Or if that isn’t possible then find some quiet residential backstreets to walk in instead. Parks are full, it’s nobody’s fault just sheer weight of numbers and nowhere else to go.

The cough - yes that seems thoughtless but coughing is involuntary, if she’d just inhaled a fly or swallowed the wrong way or something, she probably didn’t have much choice about where and when to cough!

Yep we were on the edge of the bath half in the mud half on the path. But like I said in the post earlier their was more then enough space for a car to fit past us so it’s not a tiny path if that makes sense.

We take him in the evenings on roads but during the day the dog needs a longer walk so has to be a park. Will try going as early as I can.

Fair enough if the cough was involuntary but she should have had the decency to turn around or walk past us not in my mums face pretty much.

It’s the only place people can go so of course they are full

Tosh. There are plenty of quiet places people can go, just takes a little bit of aforethought to pick somewhere unpopular.