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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask how long it took for your DC to be dry at night

154 replies

speedawarenesscourse · 01/01/2021 13:52

DC1 is 5 and a few months and not yet dry at night. I had been waiting for dry nappies in the morning, but it hasn’t happened yet, and they are very aware that friends don’t now wear nappies so are asking not to.

It’s been about ten days so far, and every night has been like clockwork: fine and dry all night until 5.30-6am, when they come in to say that they have done a wee.

I was just wondering how long it has taken other DC to learn, and if we should just keep on as we are, or if there is something else I can do to help them?

(Sadly I am aware of the very persistent piss troll, so would ask that people don’t give any actual details about their DC that he might enjoy, just how long it took/anything else I can do, thank you so much!)

OP posts:
mushycarrots21 · 01/01/2021 13:55

Ours weren’t dry till 8 and 10! One stayed in pull ups for ages and one didn’t. Neither helped. I think they were just going to get there in their own time. Obviously that’s really rare to take that long and I’m sure you’re won’t be that long, but they did get there eventually.

JohnLapsleyParlabane · 01/01/2021 13:58

DD was dry day and night by 2.5. But she's an extraordinarily stubborn child and we didn't potty train her, she decided she disliked nappies.
Following this thread as DS seems pretty different to his big sister.

bathorshower · 01/01/2021 13:58

DD was a little past 5. I'd told her she had to be dry for a whole week before she could stop wearing nappies (as I couldn't face the laundry), and over the course of a month she went from wet every night to dry every night.

I'm intrigued that you say your DS is 'fine and dry all night until 5.30-6am'. Firstly, how do you know he's still dry at 5am?! Also, are you sure he doesn't wake up then and just use the nappy because it's easier. DD didn't do it, but I know of others that have.

elliejjtiny · 01/01/2021 14:00

Mostly dry at 12 but still wetting once a month or so
6
8
Still wetting every night aged 7
Still wetting most nights with the occasional dry one aged 6

AlohaMolly · 01/01/2021 14:01

About 8 months ish. I didn’t toilet train DS until a month or two after his 3rd birthday, which was a bit late really but did mean he was dry during the day within the week. I kept him in nappies at night for another month or so until he asked, one night, if he could keep it off. For the next five months he had a few accidents at night, maybe 10 in total? But I pulled him out of nursery after a term and a half because it didn’t suit him and he was very anxious. After I did that he was completely dry and has been for the rest of this year, despite the pandemic etc.

I think it’s a lot to do with the development of a sleep hormone though?

EpicDay · 01/01/2021 14:02

This one comes up from time to time on MN and you will get lots of different advice. But my experience, having had two sons, is that it happens when they’re ready. My older son was not dry at night until he was 6 and still, aged nearly 18, gets up once if not twice a night for a wee. My younger son was dry at night by the time he was 3. It is a question of a hormone kicking in that concentrates urine production at night, or alternatively neurological development which means that they are able to wake up in order to go to the loo. My sister used a bell and pad device when her son was still wetting the bed aged 7 and it worked very well but you can’t do that until the child wants to. I know from my own experience that doctors aren’t interested until the child is at least 8. It is very tricky for sleepovers if they are embarrassed - my older DS was fine about just fronting it up and saying that he needed to wear a nappy at night but I have to say I think he was pretty unusual in that. Good luck.

AlohaMolly · 01/01/2021 14:03

Can I just say, I meant a bit late for him as he was ready for a month or two before that. I didn’t mean it as passing judgement on anyone else.

loveyouradvice · 01/01/2021 14:03

four and a half .... and agree with others, it just happened.... she wanted to be dry earlier but just wasn't ready

Emeraldshamrock · 01/01/2021 14:05

It depends on the DC.
DD was 4.5
DS was 2.
He has a large bladder he will urinate 3 times a day only.
I think I delayed DD as she was dry within a few days of no nappy.
They feel secure and able to wee whereas with pants on she learned to wake.

Pemberleys · 01/01/2021 14:06

8 yrs, don't try and force the issue.

PeonyTruffle · 01/01/2021 14:08

DS is 6 and still in pull ups (night only) limiting fluids doesnt work, waking him for a wee doesnt work, putting him on the loo half asleep doesnt work, he is the deepest sleeper I have ever come across, so I dont I don't think it's a case of him being lazy, he has no idea he is even going.

IndecentFeminist · 01/01/2021 14:09

Dd was just on 10, she had been on medication for an overactive bladder since about 8.5. She didn't wear pull ups as the medication kept her dry 6/7 nights a week. She's not on any meds now, and is dry reliably most weeks. Every now and then she will have a spate of a few nights on the trot being wet.

Ds was the similar, he was dry by about 8. No medication. Again, still have the odd accident.

Ds is 3 and refusing potty training at the moment. 🙄

NotExactlyMrsCurrentAffairs · 01/01/2021 14:10

Ds1 was dry day and night by around 3yo
Ds2 was dry during the day around 2 1/2-3yo but took much longer for night, he is a heavy sleeper, he was still wearing pull ups for bed until around 6yo

TWBAEM · 01/01/2021 14:12

6 years old, and 5 years old (although we are still working on the 5 year old, will be dry for weeks then wee in the bed every night for a fortnight Hmm)

Try and relax, there is nothing you or they can do about it and it isn't worth the stress!

Zofloramummy · 01/01/2021 14:12

My dd was 9, no amount of training will help if they aren’t producing enough of the hormone they need to stay dry at night. She stayed in pull ups and I didn’t make a big issue out of it. She went dry naturally over lockdown.

DappledThings · 01/01/2021 14:13

DD was 2.5, DS is nearly 5 and still not dry. So he's still in a night nappy when his little sister isn't. Doesn't bother him (or us).

AlaskaThunderfuckHiiiiiiiii · 01/01/2021 14:14

DS was 7 in November and is still in pull ups at night, he can be dry for a few days and then be wet again but I am not pushing the issue as others have said it’s to do with the hormone that controls it. I am trying to limit drinks past tea time though which seems to be hit and miss

IndecentFeminist · 01/01/2021 14:15

Fwiw, the consultant we saw for DD said that limiting fluids won't work as it won't encourage the bladder to stretch and grow...which is what it needs to do to accommodate a night's full of urine. Obviously don't let them drink loads in the house before , but certainly don't limit it.

Similarly lifting at bedtime won't help/work in the long term.

Apparently some people do have success with alarms. But nothing can trigger the hormone that needs to be produced to allow true night dryness bar time.

NHS aren't interested until 8, I'd stick with pull ups for as long as he needs, and washable mats under his sheets.

Clymene · 01/01/2021 14:16

How is a 5 year old 'very aware' that their friends don't wear nappies at night?

Confused
ImHereForTheEntertainment · 01/01/2021 14:17

My ds was 3. Went no nappies day and night in 1 go.. Dry day within 6 days and about a week after night too.

My dd was just before 2. She was dry during day. Then one night forgot a nappy and she was dry. And then didn't bother after that. That was nearly a Yr ago and prob had 4 accidents in total.

All kids are different. My dsd is 8 and often wets at night

2lostsouls · 01/01/2021 14:17

Almost 11. Waited for pull ups to be dry in the morning (never happened). Assumed there was a severe lack of the right hormone. Bought an expensive alarm mat thing to try out, and he was dry overnight after 3 nights and has been ok since (touch wood). I don’t understand why being woken as he started to wee has fixed it - but it did. Can’t believe it’s done!

Hankunamatata · 01/01/2021 14:21

I'd stop night nappies. Sounds like they may be waking up and having a wee in their nappy.

RoganJosh · 01/01/2021 14:22

Many of their friends will still be in nappies at that age. 1 in 10 seven year olds will, according to ERIC.

HigherFurtherFasterBaby · 01/01/2021 14:22

DD1 was dry at night just after 3.

DD2 was dry at night just after 2 - I have no idea how but she just decided to use the toilet and was all trained within a week.

DD3 is almost 5 and still isn't dry at night.

IndecentFeminist · 01/01/2021 14:22

Agreed, at 5 this wasn't something that was on any of my kids' radars. It isn't something that comes up in conversation and they're hardly on sleepovers yet.

If it ever did come.up, and it tended to be when she was older, we just told her that there was a hormone needed and everyone produced it at different times. That the supermarkets sold pull ups for 15 yr olds because it wasn't uncommon and there was nothing to be ashamed of, she'd be dry when she was ready.

I also said to her that things to do with wee etc are private, so not something she would necessarily want to discuss with others.

I only mention DD in this context because she was #1, ds was never worried because we were having the convos with his sister throughout anyway.