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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask how long it took for your DC to be dry at night

154 replies

speedawarenesscourse · 01/01/2021 13:52

DC1 is 5 and a few months and not yet dry at night. I had been waiting for dry nappies in the morning, but it hasn’t happened yet, and they are very aware that friends don’t now wear nappies so are asking not to.

It’s been about ten days so far, and every night has been like clockwork: fine and dry all night until 5.30-6am, when they come in to say that they have done a wee.

I was just wondering how long it has taken other DC to learn, and if we should just keep on as we are, or if there is something else I can do to help them?

(Sadly I am aware of the very persistent piss troll, so would ask that people don’t give any actual details about their DC that he might enjoy, just how long it took/anything else I can do, thank you so much!)

OP posts:
WalkingMeAway · 01/01/2021 14:58

DS was potty trained at 3y4m. He’s recently been consistently dry at 3y10m. I don’t think it’s something you can train though is it? I recall my DD was much older. Closer to 5

Perfect28 · 01/01/2021 14:59

Can you wake them up in the night for a sleepy toilet trip? This worked with my brother

HappyAsASandboy · 01/01/2021 14:59

DS1 - 6 years (3 years after day dry)
DD - 10 years (7 years after day dry)
DS2 - 4 years (2 weeks after day dry)

It is totally biological and not something you can train (unless you really believe they're choosing to wee in bed rather than get up, but I would thing that's extremely rare).

DD was desperate to be dry at night. Sleepovers, camp etc were all very difficult for her to manage and caused her lots of anxiety. We had about 5 runs of 2 dry nights over the years, but other than that she wet heavily every single night. Pull ups until about age 7 and then nothing would fit/hold the volume. Then suddenly, a few months after her 10th birthday, she just stopped weeing during the night. She doesn't wake up to go to the loo, just suddenly doesn't need the loo overnight and so is dry. It is amazing going from 7 complete bed changes/washes a week to zero Grin I can choose when I wash bedding now!

AndcalloffChristmas · 01/01/2021 15:00

6.5 for Ds
2.5 for dd

I know of lots of kids who we’re older than Ds though, especially boys

Moo678 · 01/01/2021 15:04

#1 age 3
#2 nearly 5
#3 2.5 and still in nappies full time

Our #2 was so lazy that I think she would wake in the mornings and rather than getting up to pee would just go in her nappy. I couldn’t cope with wet sheets so she stayed in pull ups until she was dry. In the end bribery worked I think - but not until she was ready. I was nervous at her starting school still in nappies at night but a friend with slightly older kids reassured me that it wasn’t a big deal.

Anothermother3 · 01/01/2021 15:06

First DC was around 6 (felt like it would never happen) second would have been 3 but went backwards with arrival of sibling and so was 4. It just happened with DC1 who sounds more like your situation but DC1 didn’t want to have accidents so didn’t mind waiting for the pull ups to be dry. It wasn’t for lack of trying with DC1 whereas dc2 was nearly there at just 3 and I could have pushed that a bit but didn’t because of having a newborn.

haba · 01/01/2021 15:10

As posters say, they have to have that hormone produced before they can be dry at night...and children are all different. DD was dry at night about 12 months after daytime. DS was dry at night years before he got through a day fully dry, and he was about 10 months younger than DD had been dry at night.

YonderTweek · 01/01/2021 15:20

My son was dry by 2.5 and woke up with dry nappies, but insisted on wearing pull ups at night for ages because he liked them. Grin He was about 3 when we told him that once he tries pants at night he'll never go back, and that was it. He was surprisingly easy to toilet train but it might be because he rarely wees and you really have to remind him to go for a wee.

Pascha · 01/01/2021 15:20

Ds1 was about 3.5, he just naturally stopped by himself. Ds2 was still in pull ups periodically til near 7. From about 5. 5 for about a year he would go a week, 10 days, dry then regress. We just kept with the pull ups til we had a clear month of dryness and then swapped to pants and a bed pad under the sheet.

MarshaBradyo · 01/01/2021 15:21

Dd is just three and us dry at night

We left potty training in the day pretty late so she did it all a couple of weeks apart

OoohTheStatsDontLie · 01/01/2021 15:32

Hi OP
My daughter is 5.5 and just starting to be dry. I called the school nurse about it as there seemed to be no progress at all (her pull up was consistently soaking) and she said they dont worry about it enough to take any further action til they are seven.

Through the chat we worked out that my daughter wasnt drinking anywhere near enough to stretch her bladder, she was never 'full' and her capacity was so low her bladder could only cope with small amounts. She said at that age they need to be drinking a certain amount each day, I cant remember what it was, maybe 2 litres? We measured it and it was 6 full glasses of water a day. I think before that she was drinking 1.5

She said drink too thirds of all your daily liquid before lunch, and a third after lunch, and only sips from 2 hours before bed. We have been trying this, it took about a month for it to work. She now has about one accident a week at night. We do 4 or 5 drinks a day, and there is resistance to it but she understands the bladder is a muscle and she needs to train it. Also the nurse said some drinks make things worse like fizzy or acidic.

Of course that might not be the reason for your childs night wetting but if she doesn't already drink a lot, it doesn't do any harm to try it

Good luck!

MadeForThis · 01/01/2021 15:33

Both DD's age 5&3 are still in night pull-ups. Dd5 has had a few dry nights but nothing consistent.

When dc are dry overnight, do they tend to hold it all night or get up to go to the toilet?

CarterBeatsTheDevil · 01/01/2021 15:42

Ours is just three and usually dry at night. We followed the Oh Crap recommendation, ditched all nappies night and day at the same time, and got into the habit of taking her to the loo just before we go to bed. She tends to wake once in the night for a drink and we take her then. But she's generally dry if she doesn't wake, too, although that wasn't the case at first. So on the loo right before bedtime (as in the last thing to do before she goes to bed), and take her again in the night if she wakes. Seems to work, although I am looking forward to her being able to take herself to the loo at some point.

MarshaBradyo · 01/01/2021 15:44

@MadeForThis

Both DD's age 5&3 are still in night pull-ups. Dd5 has had a few dry nights but nothing consistent.

When dc are dry overnight, do they tend to hold it all night or get up to go to the toilet?

Dd hasn’t been in the night yet apart from first night when she had an accident. We were going to delay but she was keen to ditch the nappy. Since then she just sleeps all night without needing to go.
sunshineandskyscrapers · 01/01/2021 15:47

My DS is a similar age to yours and also an early waker. I suspected he was just weeing in his nappy when awake as it's easier than going to the toilet especially first thing in the morning when the messaging he'd been getting was to stay in bed. So I've changed my messaging in that he knows now that if he's awake he should get up for a wee, even if he's wearing a nappy. I've put ds in charge of his own toileting in the morning, because he is always awake before me. I've asked him to go to the toilet as soon as he wakes up and I've put a bin next to the toilet where he can put his nappy. He then invariably comes to wake me up and let me know that he's done it. He needs to know that it's okay to get out of bed or else he has no choice but to wee in his nappy. He also knows that the idea is to get as much wee as possible in the toilet. And obviously he's looking for praise for a job well done, so I've had to accept that he's going to wake me up every time he wakes up for a wee. Initially the nappies were wet but at least he was going through the motions. Yesterday he came in to me at around 5am. The nappy in the bin was dry. He then went back to bed and (unusually) did go back to sleep for about an hour. This morning it was 2.30 when he came in. Again the nappy was in the bin and dry. It was a bit of a leap of faith to let him go back to bed without a nappy but actually he stayed dry. So I think we're going in the right direction but we're not quite ready to lose the nappies, especially since it may all go to pot next week when he's back to school.

Changechangychange · 01/01/2021 15:51

@Clymene

How is a 5 year old 'very aware' that their friends don't wear nappies at night?

Confused

Children talk and comment on differences. DS is 3 and comes home telling me “Caspar eats sausages at home but we don’t” (made up example).

He is very vocal in public toilets and changing rooms about “that baby has a nappy on but I don’t because I’m a big boy”. I can easily imagine him having conversations with his friends about night nappies.

Rowgtfc72 · 01/01/2021 15:51

Dd was dry during the day at 2 but not dry at night till 5 and a half. She slept so soundly for 12 hours every night and even slept through an earthquake.

Chatting with other parents at school pick up and feeling rather embarrassed it turns out there were at least five other kids in her class not dry in her year.

ShinyGreenElephant · 01/01/2021 15:52

DD1 mostly dry by 7, 100% dry by 9. Tried everything but in the end we just had to wait it out. DD2 was fully dry day and night by 18m. Didn't do anything different

ForeverBubblegum · 01/01/2021 15:55

DS is 4 and mostly dry (accidents every few weeks, but getting there), but he's up for the day at around 6 anyway. Best advice is layer up the mattress with alternating sheet then waterproof, and have a spair quilt ready to go. Then in the night it takes less then a minute to pull off wet layer and grab new quilt, and everyone gets back to bed before getting properly awake.

Soubriquet · 01/01/2021 15:56

Dd was dry by the age of 5. She’s 7 now and hasn’t had an accident

Ds is 6 in March and we still get wet pull ups in the morning

No rush. He will be dry when he’s ready

CecilyP · 01/01/2021 16:13

They vary such a lot. DS always had a saturated nappy in the morning but at 3.2, after being dry during the day for 8 months, I decided to bite the bullet and leave the night nappy off and he was dry straight away. Probably had 6 wet beds over the next 3 years. Sorry, not much help.

Can I ask what time he goes to bed? It is quite possible he can go a certain number of hours without needing a pee - but no more. It also happens as we get older and can’t go the whole night without needing a pee (and our nights are a lot shorter than a 5 year olds) Luckily, we tend to wake up rather than wetting the bed! In his case, if he is insistent that he no longer wants to wear a pull up, it may be worth trying an alarm as it will wake him up before he goes rather than after he has wet the bed.

TheBottleIsFullofHappiness · 01/01/2021 16:23

6 year old is still in pull ups at night, and sometimes still needs changing through the night. She doesn't wake up at all, has always needed me to wake her in the morning so just sleeps through. I think it'll be awhile before she's "trained" at night time.

MinnieMountain · 01/01/2021 16:33

DS was 6 years 8 months. He had the odd dry pull up in the year before. Once his body was actually ready he had one accident then was completely dry.

He very occasionally wakes up for a wee.

CreamFirstThenJamOnTop · 01/01/2021 16:36

Dd it was a week after her fifth birthday..... she’s had 2 accidents in the 5 months since.

itakephotos · 01/01/2021 16:41

I couldn't tell from your post if you had tried without nappies overnight and the nappy is wet 5/6am?
Our girl is 4 next month and although dry in the day for a year she would always have a wet nappy in the morning. We tried last night without a nappy as I suspected she would wee in the nappy for convenience and before she went to sleep....she managed all night dry last night so it might be worth a try without a happy to see?