AIBU to think that the majority of people on here are middle class and high earners?

[Kaylasmum49]

Just curious.

*There are loads of poor people on here, they talk about it too. There are also plenty who used to be poor but found their finances improved as they got older. Many from working class backgrounds.

We all have similar problems though, when it comes to life experiences, relationships, children, illness and bereavement, etc. Nobody is without difficulties in life.*

This. I was born 'poor'. Black, single parent household where my mother did work (we went hungry at times, until my grandmother stepped in), passed from pillar to post due to childcare (I remember crying/feeling unsettled about this), time spent in a B&B, walking everywhere as we didn't have cash for fare etc.

Now, husband (similar background but more stable than mine) is a good earner (well over 100k anyway) and I earn a good salary too. Our house is in a poor/deprived area that has been shat upon on Mumsnet quite a few times 😆, but it's what we could afford at the time and we've grown to really like it here. With the exception of my husband's car that looks stupidly out of place and makes the neighbours gossip about him being a drug dealer, I'm sure people would not assume that we earn what we do. But one thing I would admit is that I am very grateful to have financial security. I have cried when changing my son's nappy because my mum once had to make the choice between nappies or food. I actually wonder if my husband and I are reluctant to live too 'big' due to our background.

Bold fail*

@sst1234

I wonder if men on dadsnet would take the same approach to high earners as this thread shows. So many high earning posters have shared their income but been mostly ridiculed, scoffed and disbelieved by others. Maybe not personally but in spirit. Surely, the logical thing to say would be, congratulations, how did you get there, what do you do, any hints or tips? That’s an upfront question too by the way in case some of the posters want to share their experiences.

I totally agree! I think it's crass to brag about your possessions and wouldn't mention our combined income in company, but my friends and I are all upfront with each other about our salaries and salary negotiations, one of my friends in particular is a real go-getter and her example has definitely encouraged me to be more aggressive when advocating for myself.

I'm quite proud of my career progression and happy to share what I did to get there. I got a 4 year BA which my parents paid for (in the US- this is quite a leg up, for which I am very grateful, most people have to take out exorbitant loans) a liberal arts degree which i would not do again if I could do it all over. I started working as a nanny after school and decided to pursue my MA for a job which specifically requires a master's to work in the field, considered a "soft" science. I worked full time as a nanny (avg 30k a year) while getting my MA, my husband also worked which allowed us to pay for my degree, again without loans. I chose to do a more technical track for my degree because I didn't want to work with the public. I got a temp position after school in a niche technically focused side of the industry, then was moved into a supervisory position after about a year for which I negotiated a 10k raise to 50k (usd). I stayed in the position for 5 years without a title change or significant raise which I wouldn't do again. Towards the end of my time there I decided I wanted to earn more money (my friends getting promotions and my husband out earning me so severely contributed to this) and took a bootcamp (while still working full time) to add some specific tech skills. After that I landed a job in a technical field for a 20k raise, having an MA and supervisory experience certainly helped even though it's in a pretty different industry. I did turn down two jobs that I felt weren't a good salary match. I quit my job because I'm pregnant but am using my time off to get a pmp certification which I'm hoping will lead to a higher paying job when I'm ready to go back to work. I would not have been able to pursue so much extra education if I had had children earlier, I'm 30 now. I'll probably never reach my husband's earnings unless he changes industries as he now has a lot of experience in high paying field but I'm happy to keep on as I have been, adding certifications/skills based on financial impact and swapping jobs every couple years. For those in a similar situation/pay disparity with their spouse, I will say that my husband and I contribute the same dollar amount to our retirement accounts, I'm in charge of bills and investments and I highly recommend the same for financial security for any woman. I think not being on top of your finances is willful risk-taking and not trying to get as much money as you can regardless of your profession is silly, why not get as much money as you can?

@finkking

1-2m absolutely but 4m plus Im not sure.

Here you go.

www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/map.html?locationIdentifier=REGION%5E87509&minBedrooms=3&minPrice=4000000&numberOfPropertiesPerPage=299&radius=1.0&propertyTypes=&includeSSTC=true&viewType=MAP&mustHave=&dontShow=&furnishTypes=&viewport=-0.236172%2C-0.112576%2C51.4956%2C51.596&keywords=

There are over 250 for sale and hundreds more in the 1 mile radius that are (not for sale) being lived in.

@Kaylasmum49

I personally think that what you earn shouldn't define you. But my general feeling on here is that a lot of the higher earners/middle class people really look down on the lower earners. There was a thread on here recently about how someone would hate to be a "supermarket worker" as if that was an embarrassing job to do. Unfortunately in my job I see that attitude too often from more middle class people towards me. They look at me like I'm worthless.

Yes, my experience too. People with that attitude also tend to be incredibly short sighted and believe that if anyone in the position of being a low earner just worked hard, all the problems would be solved. What they can never see is how they rely on low earners to enable them to go out and study, progress, work so hard in order to achieve what they have. Their elderly and vulnerable relatives are cared for, their children cared for, food available to be bought or delivered, offices cleaned, houses cleaned, driven to work by bus or train drivers and those places kept clean and running, their cars fixed by mechanics, able to fill their cars with fuel because there's someone there to facilitate that and fuel there to start with because someone delivered it. Society would collapse without some of the lowest paid positions out there, we need both the high paid ones for their skill set and their ability to afford to pay for services provided by the lower earners, but we need the lower earners too. Ideally, everyone should be respected for the part they are playing in making society work, but there's a lot of snobbery towards lower earners, which is then mirrored back.

Well said @Afeckinchoo

I haven't really got that impression on here. Many posters seem to have quite negative attitudes towards university level education and the number of posters who like to characterise graduates as stupid, hapless and impractical is quite odd; or just generally towards people who pose views which challenge their entrenched values even slightly.

There are also a lot of posters with huge chips on their shoulders.

I totally respect and applaud your post Afeckinchoo. Society relies on large numbers of low paid workers to run smoothly. I rely on the carers that look after DMIL 300 miles away to make sure she's clean and fed and comfortable. I rely on the mechanic who services my car to tell me what needs doing to keep it safe and roadworthy. Can't comment on public transport because there's not enough to be useful here. But, having had a good education and a decent brain, my contribution to society is to earn well and pay back via the tax system.

But I pay both of them; it's not a service provided as of right. And I pay the full rate. Out of taxed income.

Not a complaint, BTW!

There are over 250 for sale and hundreds more in the 1 mile radius that are (not for sale) being lived in.

Sorry I'm not sure what your point is. I'm a Londoner who lives in Wandsworth. Yes London is full of expensive homes just not sure hundreds of thousands of them are 4m plus.

Yes @XingMing

That's the way it works, whether those at either end of the scale like it or not.
The problems arise when people in jobs like mine, in receipt of in work benefits are told they just don't work hard enough, that they're scroungers, but also that we don't 'deserve' to earn more because of the job we do - what's the answer to that then?(general question not specifically directed just at you).
I don't think I'm 'worth' any more than you because my contribution is physical rather than financial, but in the same vein I don't think you're 'worth' any more than me for the same reasons. Both are valuable and should be valued.
Unfortunately my experience is that my contribution isn't valued at all, rather the opposite, because it's not financial, and for some that is the benchmark of a decent person.

Society would probably sail on smoothly without me, but not without you, for a while at least @Afeckinchoo. Thank you for everything you do.

@GreenlandTheMovie

I haven't really got that impression on here. Many posters seem to have quite negative attitudes towards university level education and the number of posters who like to characterise graduates as stupid, hapless and impractical is quite odd; or just generally towards people who pose views which challenge their entrenched values even slightly.

There are also a lot of posters with huge chips on their shoulders.

Weirdly, a lot of those payers do actually seem to have been to university themselves!

It’s often more of a “proles, know your place and learn a trade” thing. With uplifting stories about how their builder is a millionaire, and he left school unable to read or write, so why should anybody working class be allowed to go to university to study something worthless like English or History?

Completely ignoring the 99% of school leavers with no qualifications who do not end up as millionaire owners of construction companies.

And don’t even get me started on the “I’m vair posh, and my husband is a working class bit of rough” thread

Oh yes, ChangeChangeyChange the posts from the 1940s about how the woman has endless qualifications and multiple degrees, but the husband who left school without an O Grade earns far, far more money than her. But strangely the woman with all these qualifcations has never thought to question why an unqualified men might earn "3 times as much" as her (or whatever multiuser is used).

Baffling, as very uninspiring, but the message is clear - to put women with qualifications in their place.

@XingMing

Society would probably sail on smoothly without me, but not without you, for a while at least *@Afeckinchoo*. Thank you for everything you do.

Thank you.

Society would sail along without me or you as one person, but collectively as 'groups' then we'd be in trouble without one or the other really.
I admire people who've had the strength to go and get what they've wanted from life, I have no doubt there's hard work involved, I just wish society in general didn't see the size of your paycheck as the be all and end all really. There's so much more to people than what they earn.

I wanted to mention a group of people of all 'classes' on Mumsnet often forgotten and undervalued.

Carers are people from all incomes, educations, ages and backgrounds and mostly women. They have usually had to give up jobs, professions and careers to care for an unwell, terminally ill or disabled family member. Or perhaps a temporary career break as a SAHM had to become permanent because life changed and a disabled child was born, a partner became seriously unwell or an elderly parent developed dementia.

This is unpaid, often backbreaking, often soul destroying, often health diminishing, often isolating work. That is unless you count the Carers Allowance which is currently £67.25pw as pay. This works out at £1.92ph for the minimum 35hrs of caring required to qualify. For the many Carers who provide full time sole care, 24/7, day and night, this works out at 40p an hour.

This equates to an income of £3497pa, wherever they live, whatever their 'class'.

Let's not forget or undervalue them as we think about the Mumsnet demographic.