Was she being unreasonable or smart?

[Shouldputcheeseonit]

Totally lighthearted, sharing for lighthearted opinions!
Spent Christmas Day At MILs with DH, BIL, SIL and our kids. In the afternoon when the kids opened their chocolates we asked them to offer them around, MIL had a box out too, and DH opened his.
SIL took one every time she was offered but didn’t eat them, put them in her handbag. I’d estimate by the end of the day she had about 15 chocolates in there! I felt amused, but DH and MIL had a rant about it after SIL and BIL had left, saying you shouldn’t take a choc unless you intend to eat it.
Was she being unreasonable or is it rather smart to save them for later, if you don’t fancy them now? I reckon she would have had a nice pre-bed snack!
Yes: she was unreasonable, only take if you’re going to eat
No: what a good idea, save them for later!

Maybe she was full but still wanted a chocolate later? Sensible if you ask me.

Ha ha, over my dead body @YouBoughtMeAWall

Was she taking them to be polite?

I wouldn't ask my kids to offer them round of they were their presents. If they chose to then fine but to me that's the unreasonable bit.

That is how DH was brought up, hence the 'correct' way for (adult) DSS, who cry no, we gave you those for you to enjoy when I offer a gift around. My mother made us share anything that was opened, explaining that they tasted better when shared.

I'm sixty now and still find that they do taste better when shared. Early training eh?

My opinion was also formed by a cousin, close in age to me,who spent the summer with us. I like company so for the whole three months gladly shared everything with her while she ate her way through bag after bag of 'pick and mix' style sweets, never offering them around once. She occasionally explained that her mother had given them to her because she "had" to spend the summer away from home. Sigh.

We knew we were living quite the glamorous lifestyle abroad, knew it was only temporary and were encouraged to share our good fortune with her. Even now I wonder why she didn't just go home, if she was so homesick. Late '70s before cheap air tickets so it was a BA open return, she could have changed it anytime.

I certainly wouldn't force children to go visiting unless they really, really wanted to and would make sure that they knew they could go home any time.

Goodness, that was a bit of a rant. Sorry 'bout dat. I think I had forgotten all about that for ages.

Oh, back on thread, I would accept one chocolate, to avoid the whole you don't need to diet / go on, it's Christmas stuff and keep it to eat later. I would not take more than one in those circumstances. In fact, part of the training to offer chicks round was to never take more than one.

Ooops, sorry back about me again. Soz.

Strange and a little rude and selfish. When you're offered something that is clearly someone elses you shouldn't take much and only if you eat it then. It's not like they were communal chocolates and she was saving her share for later, which would still be weird but less selfish. I'd have stopped offering her and would probably have made a joke about it.

Loving all the people outraged that the children had to share their ma-hoosive box of chocolates. It’s a tub of celebrations, I’m sure they had plenty to keep them going!

She was being very rude. It's just not done.

I think it's just something to chuckle about and see if she does the same every year - like a Christmas tradition/puzzle - will Aunty X eat or pocket the chocolates this year. We used to do the same but 'will gran buy ugly slippers that are too small for mum again this year.'

Weird is she really that hard up that she’s not likely to have any chocolates at home?
I would only take one from a child even if J wanted more.

What I would find odd is being offered a chocolate with the condition that I eat it immediately in front of the offerer. That would be bloody weird to me.

What I would find really odd, and incredibly rude and nasty, is accepting a proffered chocolate, then being the subject of scorn and ridicule behind my back because I failed to comply with some unspoken condition placed upon accepting said chocolate, then finding that someone had started a thread about it on MN. I would find that fucking mental.

What I would consider very reasonable and in no way odd is accepting a proffered sweet with the intention of enjoying it later when I fancied it.

She’s weird

So cheeky! You've gotta admire her style though!

I would think it a bit weird but wouldn't really care much. It's just chocolates.

Very weird behaviour! Why would you take chocolates from a child and squirrel them away? I think I’d have said something at the time though.

I don’t eat choc late in the day as makes me not sleep, so I would take one and eat the next day, but would mention why.

I do it. I'd rather eat the chocolate as a little occasional treat when I felt like it than just because they are there.
Off to look at eating disorder thread, seeing as it looks like this is disordered eating.

Could she of taken them to not be rude to the kids if they were excited/enjoying passing them round? It not it is rather odd.

Not normal to take chocolate from kids and not even eat it.

I'd think she has an eating disorder and is panicking about what she's supposed to do so is taking one but not eating it as a compromise.

Did she take green triangles and the purple ones? If so she is being very very unreasonable. If however she kindly removed orange creams and strawberry creams from circulation she is a deeply lovely person and if you let me have her address I can send her more.

Wrong to take them off the aunts but right to take them off the children.
They need to learn to share

So weird. Its great children sharing their chocolates but I think after a point someone's own gift is their own, you stop, let them enjoy their own chocolates regardless of whether you might fancy them later?! She also wasn't sharing her own box.

I normally get annoyed by the dynamic of parent receiving chocolates and then their children descending like rabid dogs upon the chocolates and the parents just letting them. When said kids have already had endless boxes and bars. But this is a new one!

*What I would find odd is being offered a chocolate with the condition that I eat it immediately in front of the offerer. That would be bloody weird to me.

What I would find really odd, and incredibly rude and nasty, is accepting a proffered chocolate, then being the subject of scorn and ridicule behind my back because I failed to comply with some unspoken condition placed upon accepting said chocolate, then finding that someone had started a thread about it on MN. I would find that fucking mental.

What I would consider very reasonable and in no way odd is accepting a proffered sweet with the intention of enjoying it later when I fancied it.*

Agree.

I’m not big on chocolate and I politely decline it when I’m at my in-laws. However, if it was a young child, I would just accept it and tell them I’m saving it for later if they ask.