Can you tell if someone is privately educated?

[bye2020]

Without knowing what school they went to?

People assume all the time that both me and my partner were privately educated. Neither of us actually were. I was educated at a very good state school he went to one of the worst schools around.

@thosetalesofunexpected

Yes I think I could tell by the way they spoke,. their attitude, Type of clothes .Body language... Even a certain look Aristriocritic look

All a bit of a give away really

@thosetalesofunexpected, surely you are referring to public school here rather than a local day school in Lincolnshire that charges 10k pa? I really can’t see any difference in how my grammar school daughter speaks, acts or dresses and how the others locally that go to the girls day school do. They all seem very alike to me.

@thosetalesofunexpected

Yes I think I could tell by the way they spoke,. their attitude, Type of clothes .Body language... Even a certain look Aristriocritic look

All a bit of a give away really

Is this not more linked to background? You would assume the majority of posh or well spoken people come from a nicer part of the city. That is obvious.

I think you can as they are more articulate and have more etiquette, and the expat ones have an American twang! 😂

I used to manage a lot of grads and while I could by no means tell every time, there were patterns I picked up on. The ones who’d been to private school often had a greater confidence about them. I can’t describe it well, but I have often speculated that it felt like the product of them being in an environment where their expectations and aspirations were positive by default.

I’m not describing it well, as that sounds like I mean arrogant and entitled, which I don’t. Maybe I’d be better at articulating it if I’d been privately educated

My 16 dd is privately educated and outwardly you’d never know however she does have a certain confidence about her. She also has a remarkable work ethic and her bedroom is full of books. She speaks a second language , plays an instrument and keeps a journal. That is a foreign country to her siblings.

Vast swathes of people assume I was privately educated (I wasn't), because of my accent.

I grew up speaking another language, and therefore don't have the dialectical accent normally associated with the city I was born in and grew up in.

I now have what I only half-jokingly refer to as 'a generic middle-class Scottish accent'. Don't get me wrong, it's done me a lot of favours (international firms LOVE it), but it doesn't half provoke a bit of snobbery in some.

Most people assume I did when it takes 10 minutes to drive from the gatehouse to the front door. In reality it was all drug money.

@Walkintal

Most people assume I did when it takes 10 minutes to drive from the gatehouse to the front door. In reality it was all drug money.

😄😄😄

Only woman I know had a son who went to private school, literally brought it up in every conversation somehow.... don't know anyone else that I know of. Like to pick out the politicians who don't ha e a rich private upbringing , haven't spotted one yet

@RowanAlong

Teaching undergraduates, I can tell. Confidence and being able to look you in the eye. (State school students write better essays, though!) Just my experience.

I’m an ex academic and this was my experience too! I lectured at a RG uni and the state school students were very bright.

Yes, largely.

There's an element of expected privilege which they assume everyone has. A naivety about the diversity of life.

This isn't unique to those who are privately educated but certainly more common.

I think it depends on the school.

Local day school in small city - probably not. Public school, probably.

I think it depends on the person.

My daughter was privately educated, she never mentions it to anyone, but you can tell from her accent. Also a male friend of mine, he has effectively no accent, as a result of his schooling, even though h is Scottish.So I think it depends on the person and the school.

Yes, there is confidence greater than their competence.

Lots of politicians have quite modest upbringings and they certainly didn’t all go to private school. Keir Starmer for a start though his school turned private while he was there. His parents were blue collar workers - happened to listen to his desert island discs!

People assume dh from grand background but his parents terribly shy manual workers who weren’t educated behind 16 themselves. In many cases you just cannot make assumptions.

At our place you can tell a mile off, it’s usually the astonishing overconfidence. Jumping to feet to speaking, get attention etc. Particularly in the younger men/intern types.
Oh, and yeah they do tend to tell you...

My husband employed a labourer who had previously been a bin man . He had been educated at one of the best private schools in Berkshire. He wasn’t very good at his job and didn’t stay long so I’m not sure what advantage he got from it . He did speak nicely though .

Having been to one myself, I can quite often tell if someone went to a girls school. However mine wasn’t private and not all are so it’s not so much about class as humour and manner really.

Yes I think you can.

And the accent. The confidence thing bothers me because it almost ALWAYS outstrips their intelligence, experience and ability to listen. And quite frankly I don’t want to listen to the opinion or ideas of someone who literally hasn’t got a clue about the project but has been t aught that they should always get themselves noticed and speak up.
And if you been taught a bit of debating or oratory then yes, it’s sounds impressive for a minute until you realise that the person sounds good but is adding nothing to the conversation and has quite literally stood up for attention.

Ive always found it difficult to tell if Scottish people who went to Scottish day schools are privately educated. Although quite often they will tell you.

Not due to the accent, or any lack thereof, but due to the lack of aspirations or sense of adventure to go and see the world, and slight chavviness. Heriots, Watsons, St George's - I'm looking at you. Also found that with some Newcastle privately educated say school people, although that might be slightly coloured by my ex.

You do wonder though where they would be without the slight polish that private school lent them - probably semi-literacy, at best. Although another ex went to Watsons, and he writes "could of"!