Can you tell if someone is privately educated?

[bye2020]

Without knowing what school they went to?

Yes...as in in, if I had to guess I think I would do better than random chance, but of course one cannot tell with 100% certainty!

CCF = combined cadet force. pupils can choose to join Navy, RAF, or Army sections. Compulsory for 1 year in DS's boarding school.

I can always tell.

With some you can, with others you wouldn't have a clue.

My ex went to a well known private school in Dorset and always let everyone know about it. It was quite wanky of him tbh!
I went to multiple schools, private, grammar and a comprehensive, I have an appreciation of all of the different environments, but I think the private education system gives you a level of confidence the state school doesn't, along with a whole load more of opportunities.

@Gwenhwyfar

"Saying that though, plenty of people speak with RP accents that don’t attend private school"

Depends where you live.

True and as you pointed out in a pp, if a child goes to a school in an affluent area, full of middle class student, parents with typically middle class jobs, then they’re likely to speak ‘posh’.

Also grammar schools are likely to have well spoken children

I was, but only for 7 years.

I later went to a state school and then uni.

I don't think people can tell in my case. But I could be wrong.

@Sheleg

I can always tell.

Unless you ask every person you meet, how could you possibly know?

@JustAnotherUserinParadise @NoIDontWatchLoveIsland I think this is where the postcode lottery comes into play again.
The state high school I attended taught Latin and I would say around 80% of us did DofE.
My DD is in Y3 at a state primary and has had piano lessons since beginning of Y3 and French lessons since reception.

Both are catholic schools if that makes any difference?

The thing is if you go to a comprehensive in a posh area, it won't really be 'comprehensive'. It will only reflect the population of that area

^^this absolutely. There's a big difference between a run down, failing inner city comp and a complete in a leafy, expensive suburb.

Money buys opportunity both educationally and socially via after school activities (if not in a school that provided them). So the "confidence of private schooling" can be seen in wealthy area comps, because the kids know that basically life isn't a massive struggle stacked against them. They don't go to school not knowing if their working parents will have enough money for food at the end of the week, or if their parent will even have had work that week. If doing decently at school means a straight path to a career, then it's easy to see where some of that confidence comes from.

The confidence thing is a product (imo) of two deliberately different ways of teaching.

I went to a comp and experienced teachers screaming at children all day and making them feel worthless. Training them for a lifetime of doff-capping and apologising for taking up space in the world.

The private system seems to respect pupils more, and raises them to be leaders.

When I have children, there's no way I'm sending them to a comprehensive.

@Almostslimjim

I think many people don’t realise that there is a huge range of private schools, they’re not all like Eton

Exactly. I bet most people haven't heard of 99.9% of private schools. Lots of private schools are orthodox religious schools e.g. Jewish schools near me. They aren't posh, they aren't academically any good, but they fulfil a religious need.

Yes, exactly.

Of course you can’t.

"as you pointed out in a pp, if a child goes to a school in an affluent area, full of middle class student, parents with typically middle class jobs, then they’re likely to speak ‘posh’."

I was talking about someone from the home counties. A child in a middle class comprehensive school in Liverpool wouldn't end up speaking RP, maybe just a weakened Scouse accent that would still sound very strong outside the area.

@Gwenhwyfar

"as you pointed out in a pp, if a child goes to a school in an affluent area, full of middle class student, parents with typically middle class jobs, then they’re likely to speak ‘posh’."

I was talking about someone from the home counties. A child in a middle class comprehensive school in Liverpool wouldn't end up speaking RP, maybe just a weakened Scouse accent that would still sound very strong outside the area.

But your taking about an accent that is particularly strong and very distinct, in the same way a ‘Brummie’ or ‘Geordie’ accent is particularly distinctive.

Other accents aren’t as easy to pinpoint, so they’re likely to be easier to ‘lose’.

Also I never said all children that live in affluent middle class areas will speak RP. I said they’re more likely to speak ‘posh’, meaning that they’d speak ‘posher’ for the area in which they live.

More to the point, none of it matters. People can put accents on to make themselves sound well spoken.

You can’t tell if someone went to private school or not based in an accent.

No, I had a mixture of both depending on where we were living. I just have more equivalent A levels than most English people that I worked with. It was on my cv but other than that only one person knew I think.
I know a mix of people and couldn’t tell you where they were educated but the man across the road used to brag about the school’s he sent his step children too. At his funeral I discovered he had a very ordinary upbringing.

Round here, the ‘clever’ people go to the grammars and the rich but not particularly clever go to the private school. It is fairly easy to tell.

I can often tell. I went to a state comp that has since been demolished for failing to meet standards since goodness knows when, but DH went to private school. He, and others in our social circle, who went to fee-paying schools have a polish and a confidence that is ingrained from the beginning. He was coached to take entrance exams and interviews, public speaking, how to behave at professional dinners and conferences, etiquette and deportment type extra classes that were all included.
I had to muddle through and teach myself those things! I’m still very intimidated at large conference, and I’m useless at networking and just introducing myself to strangers.

Those who say they can definitely tell; how?

My DD attends an extremely selective, high performing grammar school. It’s results put it towards the top, nationally. Many of our neighbours send their daughters into Manchester to one of the top performing private girls day school in the country. I honestly think there’s very little difference either in confidence or experience or indeed attainment between my DD and my neighbours’ DDs. I very much doubt anyone could tell them apart.

Its results. Clearly, I’m at neither.

Yes

I can't tell. I think you can often tell when someone went to Oxford university for undergraduate though. They are never stuck for something to say, I think due to the tutorial system they have there.

Yes I think I could tell by the way they spoke,.
their attitude,
Type of clothes
.Body language...
Even a certain look Aristriocritic look

All a bit of a give away really

It is relatively easy to identify them when they arrive to university. They tend to be very articulate, more independent and rarely have a parent making calls/questions on their behalf.

Don't think anyone can tell I did. Nobody has mentioned it and I don't find I have a whole lot of reasons to talk about school any more so I don't know if any of my friends did either.