Can you tell if someone is privately educated?

[bye2020]

Without knowing what school they went to?

People often think I went to a private school as I am confident and have a posh accent. I went to a bog standard state comprehensive.

My DC were privately educated until approx. Year 6 in England until we moved countries. They are now in the state system here and I'm afraid I can totally tell the difference with respect to their friends. My DC have on average more self awareness, confidence, a better work ethic and better executive skills (organisation, motivation) etc. than their peers. They are not smarter or glossier or anything like that but they have had instilled in them a love of learning and a sense of gratitude for their education from a young age.

I was once told I couldn’t have gone to a private school as I was too nice! 🤣

It depends on whether you really mean privately schooled or upper class.
A notifier for me is if someone says "I'n going..." ( as in Clarissa Dickson Wright and Prince Charles) instead of "I'm going..."

The private school near me offers lacrosse and hosts large chess tournaments.

They do still have English (but non-posh) accents though!

@Calmandmeasured1

I went to buy a jacket from mountain Warehouse recently and, I don't know how but, by the time we left I knew which private school the duty manager went to, how much it cost per term and that his brother was also now at the school.

I agree that you can usually tell because the privately-educated will let you know.

This is awful but I thought ''he's working in a shop though''. And then immediately afterwards ''he must have been in the bottom stream''.

My sister use to work in youth services and could tell. She was far more positive about those who weren't.

I’m really laughing at sounds pish as fuck

@BigSandyBalls2015

Yes there’s a certain confidence. My brother went to a private school.

That confidence is only imbued in to the top class(es).

The rest all end up in therapy for low self-esteem.

@5zeds DH ( boarded, scholarship) is immensely grateful to his parents for the sacrifices they made to enable him to go to public school - think no holidays, second hand clothes). This facile idea that all boarders suffered and resent it is often lazy thinking by people who don't really know what they are talking about.

Generally - can they read Latin.

@Madeupwithit

They'll tell you 9 times out of 10

This

SnowyOwlWan

My friend is public school educated and is now a TA in a state primary. Absolutely nothing wrong with being a TA but seriously, over £1m in school fees (prep- finishing A levels) and I'd would be frustrated!

Everyone always assumes I have and I actually went to a really crappy company in the 1970s/80s. I think a lot of it is to do with accent.

@OxfordwillsaveusbyFebruary

Generally - can they read Latin.

I can read Latin, as can my son. I went to state Grammar, he went to a comp.

@OneRingToRuleThemAll

DH was privately educated. He didn't realise himself until he was an adult. All he knew was he went to school.

This seems ridiculous. How could he not know?

Nope. My mum was and you’d never have guessed.
I noticed people would look at her with judgemental eyes/ look down on her a lot- as if she was ‘common’ and a bit ‘rough’.

She was just really down to earth/ bubbly and would talk to anyone about anything.

No. Amongst the people I know, especially at work, I can’t tell unless I find out that they are from a wealthy enough background.

I'd think yes but my friends the exception. She lives in a council flat and claims benefits (doesn't work). She is common as muck but was privately educated in Oxford. She is lovely though.

I’m in profession where most are privately educated and that hasn’t changed much despite efforts by the profession itself.

Etonians often share certain very particular characteristics - that’s the only individual school I can often guess accurately. Not always but often.

I was. Never mention it. Some people you can tell, some you can’t. Some you assume were but weren’t. Does it matter?

@HeronLanyon

I’m in profession where most are privately educated and that hasn’t changed much despite efforts by the profession itself.

Etonians often share certain very particular characteristics - that’s the only individual school I can often guess accurately. Not always but often.

Tell us more then 😂. What particular characteristics.

There are 2 privately educated women in my team at work, and it was a loooong time until I knew that. They certainly don't go around announcing it, and neither do any of the other privately educated people I know - including those who went to the "premier" schools, like Eton.

My children go to private school, and I would certainly say that it can give an air of confidence, and I think that come primarily from being taught in small classes, where the teacher and pupils can interact more. There is nowhere to hide in a class of 8 to 14 kids.

I agree with PP that "Private Schools" cover a very wide range. Within striking distance of my house there is a famous school, a small academically driven one, another that specialises in children with mild SN's, another that is really a paid-for Comp and a convent. I doubt they all churn out identical Tory loving, me-first arseholes....

When I meet overconfident or over-promoted people professionally, I tend to assume they did. I'm not 100% right but I'm not far off

A colleague once said to me “I can really tell that you went to a private school”

I didn’t, so clearly some people’s radar is a bit off. A lot of posters have mentioned confidence and self-assuredness, which is what my colleague spotted in me. I don’t think I’m arrogant, though. Went to high school in Glasgow.