Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Saddest things a toddler has said this year.

129 replies

55larry · 25/12/2020 22:55

My dgs is 3 years old and because of all the rules we need to live under because of COVID he has not been allowed into my house much this year. I do some childcare and on those days he asks his mother if he is allowed to come in our house and whether his mum can come in. On one occasion during the last lockdown I had to do emergency childcare and he thought he was going to have to stand outside my house all day.

What have we done to our grandchildren that he should even need to ask the question can I go inside granny’s house?

OP posts:
QOD · 26/12/2020 04:31

I just want to cuddle my great nieces and nephews. Actually their mums too. Actually I’m very close to 3 of my nieces and we were always super tactile. I miss that so

QOD · 26/12/2020 04:34

Oh erm I guess I mean really that the 5 yr old gets so excited to see us standing on the pavement outside her house then tells her Nanna that when corona is over she wants to have her fAmily properly again. And yet it’s just normal to her nearly 2 year old brother.

Popgoesthebubble · 26/12/2020 05:12

We told my 3 year old, on seeing her gp (that she normally sees several times a week) for the first time since March, this summer, that she could give them a hug if she wanted, and she refused because she said it wasn't allowed.

She's also refused to go into the park if it's too busy, because Covid is in the park

Oh and she likes playing doctors sometimes, with me as a Covid patient.

HidingInTheToiletFor5minsPeace · 26/12/2020 07:17

Flowers To everyone in this thread who has lost a loved one.

NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 26/12/2020 07:21

My almost four year old has said repeatedly lately "I just want someone to come inside our house".

He's past caring who, he just wants anyone to visit and actually come inside.

Dontforgetyourbrolly · 26/12/2020 07:23

My son isnt a toddler hes almost 7 ,but it beeaksmy heart- in a good way if you know what I mean- just how stoic and understanding hes been over every disappointment. One thing after another cancelled, he hasnt once thrown a wobbly and raged against it all , even though I wouldn't blame him one little bit
Hes rolled with all the changes and hes kept me sane .....he's been my little star .

Mummysgonetobed · 26/12/2020 07:25

Not something said, but something done. My 18m old yesterday found my sanitizer from my bag, brought it to me to put it on him and proceeded to rub it in his hands. Broke my heart that he should know he has to do that.

JillofTrades · 26/12/2020 07:27

Oh this is so sad but I feel the same. My ds is 4 and he hasn't been to school this year. I asked him what he wanted for Christmas and he said to go back to school to play with his friends in the playground.
Most of ours schools are now online and very few kids have returned.

bez91 · 26/12/2020 07:28

These are all so sad 😞
My 3 year old ran out of nursery and started waving to a little girl and I said "is that your friend" and she said "yes it's Lola but I'm not allowed to play with her because she's not in my bubble"

The same night I was bathing her and she looked at me and said "mummy are you in my bubble"

MessAllOver · 26/12/2020 07:47

We get lots of "Can X friend come to my house?"

What upset DS3 the most was when I said his grandparents couldn't be there for his birthday party (early Jan). He absolutely adores both sets and it would make his day to have just two of them there (let alone some of his little friends, as we had last year). We've decided to essentially cancel his birthday and have a "party" with grandparents when it's safer as that seems the kindest thing to do rather than upset him.

Livinghereisok · 26/12/2020 07:53

In the first lockdown my 2 year old would mimic us wearing nappy bags on his hands around the house to open door handles as we used them for opening gates and climbing over stiles on our daily walk.

TakeMeToYourLiar · 26/12/2020 07:54

I'm due DC2 imminently

Trying to work out who could have DS4 if I went into labour early (while waiting for DGP to arrive)

I've realised that he wouldn't recognise any of our local friends as he hasn't seen them for a year and would be frightened. It's so sad.

On a practical note I'm hoping baby stays put until c section

timeforawine · 26/12/2020 07:57

Mine is 4, some things she's said:
Asking if she can have friends round when the virus has gone
Asking for hand gel after going to the park
Telling us off for blowing kisses at her because it'll spread germs
Telling grandparents she can't hug them because of the virus when we met up after lockdown 1.
I can only wave at X over the gate as she's not in my bubble so we can't play

lcdododo · 26/12/2020 08:21

@MintyMabel

You've absolutely no idea if for some people it is the saddest thing this year.

I will openly admit the pandemic hasn't affected me at all, in fact I've done very well out of it. So my toddler saying something along the lines of PP would make me sad.

Just engage your brain a little and realise not everyone views things the same way as you

firstimemamma · 26/12/2020 08:26

My toddler hasn't seen his grandmother in months and has taken to kissing a framed photo of her at bedtime sometimes.

Also my child's toddler friend used to love the park. However she's now been there so many times that she screams and cries at the mention of it.

My friend is being incredibly strict and her toddler hasn't seen another child at all since March. Once we happened to see him through the window and he was trying to climb out of the window to get to us Sad

KitKatastrophe · 26/12/2020 08:35

My daughter had just turned 3 at the end of Feb and had a small party at home. My birthday was 5 days into lockdown and she wanted to know who was coming over, I said nobody and she asked "why doesn't anyone want to come to your birthday party 😭" we ended up playing pass the parcel just the 3 of us. She loved it but it was the saddest thing ever.

unlimiteddilutingjuice · 26/12/2020 08:35

At the start of first lockdown DS (8) asked if I could set him up to play Minecraft online "So I can have social interaction like in the before times"

I thought it was cute, if a bit dramatic.

I got a maths workbook for them which made me sad though.
All the problems seemed to be about kids playing at playgrounds, or sharing sweets, or going to school on a bus.

It was so weird to think that previously mundane experiences might become things they could only read about in books.

Di11y · 26/12/2020 08:37

My 6yo and 3yo were playing shops and made me use pretend hand sanitizer before I could shop (Not sad per se just telling of these times).

My 6yo often asks to do things and adds "when these times are over".

My 3yo always used to go to the supermarket with me and is very sad when I go by myself now.

All in all we've fared well this year, my 6yo snuck her birthday party in at the start of march and we live in a nice area for lots of walks (sick of the mud now though!).

SoupDragon · 26/12/2020 08:39

What have we done to our grandchildren...

Hopefully taught them to care about how to protect others.

BoxingDayTurkey · 26/12/2020 08:46

I think it's often overstated, but I do think this will have a lifelong effect for at least some very young children.

0-3s go through very rapid brain development that shapes the rest of their lives. Although access to an engaged caregiver should mitigate most of it it is like that the extremely limited social interactions and modified behaviours will impact some children.

My DC was just turning 2 at the start of the pandemic and won't have had an opportunity to legally play with one single other child for probably at least a year of that critical development window.

The saddest thing a friend's DD asks is if she can play with other people like they do on the TV or if it's just pretend.

There's also the small hypothesised increase in serious conditions like leukaemia as a result of abnormally low exposure to typical pathogens at a very young age.

Michaelbaubles · 26/12/2020 08:47

My DS is in a different bubble at school to his best friend so they don’t get to play together any more :(

The playground is spilt down the middle so two bubbles can go out there with a barricade of benches to separate the groups, and DD came home saying that her bubble, and DS’s friend’s bubble, had been out at the same time so they’d had an illicit chat across the divide!

zigaziga · 26/12/2020 08:50

In July we saw my DM for the first time since COVID and my DS asked “does Boris say I can cuddle grandma?”
I almost cried. Luckily DM gave him a massive cuddle after that, but it will always stay with me.

Mommabear20 · 26/12/2020 08:50

A friend of mines DD was fighting cancer at the beginning of the year (so grateful she's now got the all clear!) but for weeks was asking her mum 'mummy? Am I going to die of covid now, not cancer?' She's 5. 😔

BoxingDayTurkey · 26/12/2020 08:51

And of course those who would have lost their homes as a result of parents losing jobs or businesses, those whose parents worked from home for months and had no choice but to put their children in front of a screen for most of their waking hours, a stressed household, more poverty etc etc

I'm not saying there was an alternative, I don't know the answer, but it's a bit simplistic to assume toddlers aren't affected because they don't remember

Hardbackwriter · 26/12/2020 08:52

When the playgrounds closed in the first lockdown it was a bit tricky because we lived so close to one that there was no way to take DS, who was then about 20 months, for a walk without walking past it, so we had a lot of screaming about not being able to go in. He got used to it, and accepted it, and would just say 'park closed' every time we walked past. I did feel a bit sad when I put him to bed one night and heard from the landing him saying to himself 'park closed, park closed, park closed'...

I don't think we've 'damaged' our children irreparably or anything, but I do find it extraordinary that some people are so insistent that it won't have any impact, especially on ones too small to remember. Decades of research have shown how crucial those early years are, and we've done so many things this year that no one would have thought were good parenting before. If you'd said before that you were both working so trying to get away with bare minimum in terms of supervising your toddler, or that your toddler hadn't been anywhere at all apart from a walk around your housing estate for three months, or that your preschooler hadn't interacted with another child for months on end, absolutely no one would have said that was a great situation that would aid their development. I was looking at a parenting book the other day and it's just depressing how many things it talks about as 'great for their development' that you're not supposed to do now, e.g. taking them to the shops and playing counting games there.

Again, I'm not saying that this is an argument against the restrictions or that the gain isn't bigger than the loss, but it seems so stupid and a bit unkind to claim that there isn't a loss, especially since it mostly seems to come from people who didn't have to parent their own children through this.