Re-gifting becoming the norm?

[DishingOutDone]

Sat down this morning and had our obligatory re-gifted odd items from a pair of elderly relatives, everything from novelty socks to soap on a rope. We are fine with this, it usually quite amusing and sometimes the stuff they send proves very handy.

Moved on to younger, very comfortable family members/friends gifts and found the same had happened. Not so amusing. Some stuff you could see the boxes were damaged and they'd done the rounds for a while. Felt a bit sad for teenage DDs opening it all, of course they got some nice stuff from me/their Dad, but everything I'd sent out was new and everything we got back was re-gifted.

It made me wonder that if it has gone beyond elderly relatives doing it, do younger (20s-30s) people think its ok now to resort to re-gifting as the norm rather than something done now and again?

Oops, I've gone for voting - erm, so how about:

YABU = re-gifting is the way forward, everyone should do it
YANBU = its getting too much/you too have had loads of grubby socks today

I'm asking in general, not about our situation, I'm quite happy to absorb all the second hand stuff this year/pop it into a charity shop when they re-open and smile graciously at the giver!

This is a shitty thing to do. Have these relatives had a bad year? Is this a first? I know some of my family members are under financial strain and I would not mind at all if they did something like this because it would be a one-off most likely. I hope your DD got great presents from you to make up for this.

If you don’t like a gift it’s still saving you money having to buy another present. Regifting is good.

I’d see if it was just a one off year with everything going on - the thought that counts etc.

If things improve next year but it’s still the same, then probably suggest to not do presents.

I would never dream of regifting to kids & if I couldn’t afford things, then I’d just say to parents that I wasn’t doing presents for them.

I'd rather no gift at all than a regift.

YANBU

20s here - I don’t regift. I would only consider it if the item was in absolute pristine condition and unopened.

Don’t get me wrong, I have a lot of stuff I like to offload as I used to be a beauty/fashion addict. I just offer them out to friends and family rather than masquerade as a birthday/Christmas gift

We're destroying the planet with our endless desire for more stuff. Unwanted Christmas gifts are hugely wasteful. Buying new turns what should be either a religious celebration or a secular celebration of family into another buying frenzy, the amount of waste created by Christmas is enormous, and it puts so much financial.and time pressure on people. Why don't you make it that only kids get presents or do an adult secret Santa and put the focus back on the actual celebration not on stuff.

Yabvu.

I will say that it’s more environmentally friendly to regift, better than going to landfill I suppose?

All you can really do is tone down your gifts for them in the future.

I started regifting when the kids got 30 craft sets at their birthday parties. I wouldn’t regift something that was damaged, but I often regift stuff that I don’t need or want that is in ‘as new’ condition. Surely this is a much greener way to live?
Would you also complain that I wrap in pre used wrapping paper (that had been carefully removed and folded) or gift in a pre used gift bag? YABU.

(and I say the above as someone who doesn't regift for presents, though I might pass on to someone else later if I don't want it - but I'm just so tired of the whole thing. How are you supposed to know what someone you see once a year truly wants? Why are so.many people going into debt to buy matching toiletry sets that the recipient doesn't even like? It's mad)

One of my DC opened a board game today that They already have and my immediate thought was once birthday parties are back on I can use that as a gift. So yeah I would regift but only if the gift was a good quality duplicate or something like that and probably not for close family and friends as I like to think I put some thought into their gifts.

Regifting a good quality item that the recipient will enjoy is fine. Good even. What you have described, not so much.

I ordered several things new online that arrived with slightly squashed boxes looking a bit used. I wonder if this has happened to you at least with some items.
I do regift, especially books that I already have, but of course the things have to look perfect.

How do you know it was all regifted? Some stuff just gets bashed up in transit. I've opened a jigsaw this morning that is a bit bashed but I know DM bought it for me new because I requested it specially.

What’s the point of spending time and money on finding nice gifts for others, when you get thoughtless toot in return? Sounds like a good reason to suggest stopping gifts; sell it as a positive (maybe make a donation to charity instead) and have done with it.

Depends on the gift. If I got a jigsaw puzzle (for example), which I don't particularly enjoy, but knew someone who'd love it, I'd have no worries regifting. If I got an average beauty gift set, I wouldn't pass that on as it feels impersonal. I love picking out presents that I think the recipient would really like, not just give something because I have too.

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with re-gifting someone if you think the recipient will like it and it’s still in a good condition. This year has been tricky, not just financially but it’s been harder to get out to the shops so I think regifting is more forgivable this year even where the gifts don’t really suit. To be honest though I don’t really understand buying gifts for adults you don’t know well enough to buy a genuinely wanted/ thoughtful gift. I feel like it’s better to just suggest to people not doing gifts any more if you’re constantly having to regift/ donate/ give away the things they give to you - it’s not good for the environment to constantly be buying things which nobody really wants or needs. Keep gift giving to your closest family members and suggest distant relatives save their money or give to a charity if they really feel they need to Mark the day.

I find the opposite to you actually - elderly relatives are horrified at the idea of regifting (and also of things like second hand clothes) and would insist on buying new. It's more younger people that are conscious of consumerism and will regift and reuse items.

I have passed things I don't want on to my sister and friend.

Not as actual gifts, I just explain they were gifts I woudn't use eg jig saw puzzle, that they may like.

I have put things they don't want to the charity shop.

If they don't usually have form for it I would wonder if they had been struggling financially this xmas. This year has been hard.

Give it back to them next year.

@alecguinnessgenuineclass

How do you know it was all regifted? Some stuff just gets bashed up in transit. I've opened a jigsaw this morning that is a bit bashed but I know DM bought it for me new because I requested it specially.

I was going to say exactly this. All the presents I gave this year were bought new online but some of the boxes were a bit bashed by the time they arrived. I hope the recipients don't think they're regifted.

Awful.
I say that as a regifter.

I get lots of expensive items like £50 plus bottles of perfume or toiletries.

I would pass on as prizes or gifts to piano teachers, coaches etc..but never to family and they are in absolutely perfect condition.

I think that is really very poor.
Very mean.

Meh I just can't get that excited about whether presents are new or well thought out or whatever.

If you want something, just buy it yourself.