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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Re-gifting becoming the norm?

92 replies

DishingOutDone · 25/12/2020 13:02

Sat down this morning and had our obligatory re-gifted odd items from a pair of elderly relatives, everything from novelty socks to soap on a rope. We are fine with this, it usually quite amusing and sometimes the stuff they send proves very handy.

Moved on to younger, very comfortable family members/friends gifts and found the same had happened. Not so amusing. Some stuff you could see the boxes were damaged and they'd done the rounds for a while. Felt a bit sad for teenage DDs opening it all, of course they got some nice stuff from me/their Dad, but everything I'd sent out was new and everything we got back was re-gifted.

It made me wonder that if it has gone beyond elderly relatives doing it, do younger (20s-30s) people think its ok now to resort to re-gifting as the norm rather than something done now and again?

OP posts:

AliceinBunniland · 25/12/2020 13:31

I don't regift

I think it's usually obvious and I can't think of an occasion when I have been gifted something that I don't want but that I think someone else would enjoy

peboh · 25/12/2020 13:33

This year has been a bit shit. If it's a one off I wouldn't let it bother me too much, many people have avoided shopping much, and might not be super familiar with the world of online. I'd let it go and just try to enjoy the day with your family.

Clockstop · 25/12/2020 13:33

Regifting is fine if the gift is what the person would like. We've given DC all second hand gifts this year. They know this - we explained that if they had new they'd get one gift but if we bought second hand they'd get a lot more, second hand won out and a bonus is the plastic tat my DD wanted means second hand is also better for the environment.

PimlicoJo · 25/12/2020 13:37

It's pretty offensive to suggest that it's something elderly people do. I don't see what it has to do with age.

1hamwich4 · 25/12/2020 13:40

I wish regifting would become the norm- for the environmental angle.

I’ve got a second hand Roblox set stashed for DS- probably £60-70 quid new.

All the pieces are there, the instructions are there, but the box is a bit foxed. He’s seven- is he going to give a shit about this when he’s staring down the barrel of a working t-Rex model? Somehow I don’t think so...

Decent, complete stuff only, obviously- but I can’t get worked up about a slightly bashed box that’s going to get binned anyway. It’s just a norm that we need to change!

An0n0n0n · 25/12/2020 13:40

Hopefully companies will stop selling excessively packaged shite and it will die out. If no-one buys 8t new it's not there t9 be regifted.

WinterStrawbsAreLikeTurnip · 25/12/2020 13:41

If it's something I'll like I'm thrilled at second hand. It's far better for the environment.

Last years random dove set - not so much!

QuantumJump · 25/12/2020 13:44

So I have a question for people who don't re gift. What do you do if you receive something that is perfectly nice but not to your personal taste? Use it anyway? Throw it away? Take it to a charity shop?

WhatTiggersDoBest · 25/12/2020 13:46

It makes me laugh that the same people who get judgy about people who use disposable nappies or wet wipes also get up in arms about regifting. Because it's not the trendy environmental trend du jour. But when you think about all the absolute crap you get for Christmas, why not move it around until it reaches someone who actually wants it?
Selectively saving the planet or what?

WhatTiggersDoBest · 25/12/2020 13:46

*some of the same people.

S0CKS · 25/12/2020 13:53

if it was a very 'socks' gift they received wasn't for them but they actually thought of me and thought how perfect it would be for me then happily please regift on me, if it was a random bit of shit then please don't regift on me? I had a scarf given to me once, which wasn't me at all but my friend it was perfect and she used it loads that was a regift off me. If that makes any sense!

Original poster

DishingOutDone · 25/12/2020 13:57

@PimlicoJo

It's pretty offensive to suggest that it's something elderly people do. I don't see what it has to do with age.

One year my aunt in her 90s gave me a bar of soap, which was popular in the 70s and probably not manufactured since the 80s, not wrapped, studded with dressmakers pins - the really long ones?

I know what this meant to be - do you? The soap was going powdery with age, but I thought it was hilarious - because she's in her 90s I thought aw love her! She's so precious I would love it whatever I got. Today she gave me a scarf that I know full well she has worn, she's even taken the label off but this is a very specific set of circumstances based on her age. So I believe age is entirely relevant for my own personal anecdote, which I used to illustrate my point. I also happen to think it is more acceptable amongst the elderly and by that I mean 80s+ who have a different outlook.

If she was a 30 year old cousin I'd not be so amused.

OP posts:

Original poster

DishingOutDone · 25/12/2020 13:58

@QuantumJump

Definitely charity shop.

OP posts:

CoolCatTaco · 25/12/2020 14:00

It's just cheap. A new unopened gift is fair enough if it is passed on to someone who would actually want it...but palming off unwanted tat is not on. If you want to save the planet, don't exchange gifts at all.

redcandlelight · 25/12/2020 14:01

yabu
think you don't need or want if they are in good condition they get re-gifted or to charity.

vanillandhoney · 25/12/2020 14:01

I don't think there's anything wrong with re-gifting as long as the items in question are good quality and not pre-opened or too bashed about. Far better they go to a deserving owner than spend years lurking in a drawer or cupboard only to end up in the bin anyway.

Taylrse · 25/12/2020 14:01

I do regift, but only to people I know would like the item. Otherwise I donate to charity.

I don't usually like receiving regifted stuff and would rather have nothing tbh. Double standards

Flapjak · 25/12/2020 14:02

Regift back to them next year!!

RaiderOfTheKitchenCupboard · 25/12/2020 14:04

I got my husband a couple of second-hand cds and a book this year, they are out of print/hard to find new. He was happy with them. I wouldn’t regift something unless I honestly knew it would be appreciated.

Kezzywezzy · 25/12/2020 14:05

Maybe some people have been avoiding shops and some people don’t shop online? I’ve read on here about a lot of people wanting less things as a lesson learned from 2020, so maybe regifting has a place- if done with thought and kindness of course. But at the end of the day, folk are folk 😂

ChrissyPlummer · 25/12/2020 14:08

Depends what it is. One year my boss got everybody on the team a bottle of wine. I got a bottle of white; absolutely can’t stand it so gave it to one of my friends as a present. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that.

alltheadrenalin · 25/12/2020 14:08

Guilty, regifted a box of chocolates I don't like to sons nursery staff. Bottle of baileys I won't drink to a friend who does. Just got a Baylis Harding gift set that's going to be a raffle prize.

NaughtipussMaximus · 25/12/2020 14:09

I’m pretty sure my son’s presents from my auntie were regifted items that were originally given to her grandchildren! But it’s fine - they’re not quite suitable but I can always regift them if necessary!

TonMoulin · 25/12/2020 14:12

There is regift and regift isn’t there?

Regifting something when it is like new and you think the receiver willl like it is ok imo.
Regifting something that is damaged and of no interest to the receiver is crap. It plainly showing you can’t even be arsed to find something generic for them.

If something has been regifted a few times I’d assume it’s crap too and belong to the bin

Vitaminsss · 25/12/2020 14:13

The more I think about this, the more I think regifting makes sense

No one would regift anything if the gifts were something they actually liked/wanted? Maybe it’s time to stop with the token gifts like Bayliss and Harding/lynx gift sets, alcohol and chocolate boxes etc. Buying generic stuff for the sake of having something to open is the creation of this problem

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