The obligatory Bayliss and Harding...

[XmasGridlock]

Have recieved two sets this year. One from FIL and one from DH's Aunt. Also had another smelly set from DSIL. I have severe Eczema and can't use any of these types of sets. No shame in saying all will be going to the charity shops in the New Year.

FIL gave DH a bunch of cash, some new clothes, chocolate bits, etc. I got a Bayliss and Harding Set I can't even use.

Anyone else get the obligatory Bayliss and Harding set? Or maybe some other unthoughtful gifts from the in laws?

I think there's quite an amusing level of back tracking happening on this thread now. OP if you have no objection specifically to B&H & don't know anything about the cost of then versus other brands such as L'occitane / Molton Brown / Jo Malone then why name that make in the title of the thread?
I think you think your FIL has not spent enough money on your present & I think the thread was started to sneer at B&H sets.
I think loads of people love them & there's really not much difference between them & soap & glory etc but somehow B&H have become a class indicator on MN
I honestly don't care what my MIL gives me as it's only a token & really doesn't mean anything significant. If she gave me a B&H set I would thank her & I would use the products in the guest bathroom. It's only soap!

Funny how we're all different isn't it. I actually would pass dove into my mother as I cannot stand the overpowering smell & the slimey texture of it

Not a fan of Bayliss and Harding either 🙈

My mum got the dreaded mini bottle of jacobs creek wine with a floral glass set 😂

I got stuck on this thread after someone suggested asking for the receipt

I really have heard it all now!! Mumsnet at it's finest.

Just waiting for someone to say their DC has sever autism and the smell of B&H sets them off,

Bunch of snobs. This is all some people can afford. Me, I’m grateful for what I’m given.

Baylis & Harding is awful quality.

Is it? I find it does the job of ‘cleaning’ well enough.

@TheSilentStars maybe I am ungrateful. If ungrateful is not wanting a present that will aggravate my eczema. As I mentioned previously, I can literally only use one special kind of dermalogical product. I can't even wash my clothes in anything other than water.

@phoenixrosehere

I think you and various other poster are being unreasonable to mock B&H and those who gift it as all thoughtless.

I think various posters are taking offence unnecessarily and ignoring OP’s case. She has said numerous times that it is gift sets like this period due to her severe eczema and mentioned this brand because this is the one that was gifted to her. If she had received a different brand, she would have said the same thing about it being a thoughtless gift for her due to her skin condition.

Can’t believe there is an actual class issue over bath gift sets. Some people like them, some people don’t like most smellies.

This was my post and you missed the first paragraph I include above. I was clear that OP was not being unreasonable about things that might affect the eczema

Yanbu to want close family to think carefully and avoid presents that you cannot use due to the eczema.

However the tone was set in the thread title “obligatory Bayliss and Harding thread”

@caperplips As I said, I mentioned B & H specifically because that is the brand I was given and seem to get every year. I also said, had it been a Jo Malone set or a Nivea set then I'd still be on here moaning about getting a smelly set when I have bad eczema.

OP, won't you at least consider getting FIL a shit gift next time?

Baylis & Harding have a range aimed at men called Fuzzy Duck. Could you get that?

DH is being a bit of a wuss, he should be speaking to his dad about this.

I'd be pissed off too, OP. You took the time and trouble to buy your FIL something that he asked for and that he'd like. He reciprocated that for your DH but got you a gift set he just chucked in the trolley in Tesco or Home Bargains. I don't mind Baylis and Harding toiletries as such, but they're not nice gifts.

I had one for our work secret santa this year. Budget £20. Thoughtless gift. Shit quality and lacking in any effort, the same as any ‘smellies’ gift.

I received 3 this year and I have severe psoriasis. Everyone who got me one knows I have to be careful with what I use on my skin.

Have you told him the brands you can use? Maybe he hasn’t clicked onto the fact that you can’t use that particular brand. Especially if you have had it before and not said anything.

I think it’s perfectly fine to only get a token gift from the in-laws as they aren’t your parents. I’d never expect to spend the same on a their partner as I would my own child.

Have you told him the brands you can use?

This ^^

Have you spelled out to him, or has your husband, that you can only use specialist eczema cream?

Have never had one of these or any other smelly set - at least, not since I was a young teen.

Joking aside @XmasGridlock smelly sets are awful for your skin, full of nasty chemicals, but an absolute no- no if you have a skin condition.

Your OH needs to square this off with his parents, that you cannot tolerate any form of perfumed cosmetics as you have a medical condition, not you being fussy, so please can they not buy that stuff for you anymore.

However the tone was set in the thread title “obligatory Bayliss and Harding thread”

Reading the comments regardless of OP’s intention, does sound like it’s a common gift for many where the givers don’t know the recipients very well.

I thought about it and realised I had received one in the past, a decade ago, as a gift from my husband’s parents. They had never met me in person and had bought it for me for Christmas among other things. I thought nothing of it because I was too surprised that they had bought me Christmas gifts in the first place and was very warmed and grateful for it. However, I hadn’t received another set since. I couldn’t tell you what it smelled like because the scent was nice but wasn’t something I would miss if that makes sense.

I did get smellies today from my in-laws. Lovely all-natural soaps where the money goes to saving bees from my BIL and his wife. I love nature and gardening so a wonderful gift. They smell amazing and fresh. I hadn’t asked for them nor heard of the company (from Etsy). I also received a set of sheet masks from my SIL who knows I love sheet masks and have been using them since before they were carried in shops. Unexpected but a thoughtful gift nonetheless and funny enough I had bought a few yesterday. We have known each other for years, only see each other a handful of times a year because we live 400+ miles away yet my in-laws have never been thoughtless when it comes to gift-giving and if they are unsure about something, they ask my husband. Not a hard thing to do especially in this day and age,

I always get a set from my mother in law (along with money) but finally Covid’s been good for something and she sent extra money in lieu of the Baylis and Harding as we unfortunately haven’t been able to visit.

I have never bought anyone a B & H set (in case they are a mumsnetter )

Joking apart, I only buy toiletry stuff for people I know well, and I buy the brand that I know that they like, and aren't allergic to.

That said, the snobbery on this thread is depressing.

I just use Sanex (£2 for 500ml). The thought of using Baylis and Harding on my body makes me itch.

I'd tell them via your DP that you can only use prescription medication, as that will stop them trying to get you other products that could be equally harmful.

Basically they need to not buy you anything for your skin.

This is it exactly. The smellies you describe sound like the type of thing that would really hurt my skin. They also sound like a carefully thought out and selected present, that you'll really enjoy. I'd be really pissed off if my MIL bought them for me - you're really happy that your BIL bought them for you

It is, always, the thought that counts. You get a gift for the person - or you do if you have any self respect.

Sorry OP that your DP's family have been so useless. But don't let it spoil your day, and ignore the people banging on about snobbery.

Unless you're also looking for a fight on Christmas day. Which is a valid pastime, if that's what floats your boat

Damn it. Was meant to be a reply to Phoenixrosehere

I received a “Candy Cane” B&H set once. It was AMAZING! I’d buy myself another one if I saw it, it was so festive!