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Original poster

The obligatory Bayliss and Harding...

303 replies

XmasGridlock · 25/12/2020 11:52

Have recieved two sets this year. One from FIL and one from DH's Aunt. Also had another smelly set from DSIL. I have severe Eczema and can't use any of these types of sets. No shame in saying all will be going to the charity shops in the New Year.

FIL gave DH a bunch of cash, some new clothes, chocolate bits, etc. I got a Bayliss and Harding Set I can't even use. Hmm

Anyone else get the obligatory Bayliss and Harding set? Or maybe some other unthoughtful gifts from the in laws?

OP posts:
jessstan1 · 25/12/2020 15:25

Thank you XmasGridlock, I was certainly well intentioned but can assure you I will not buy them again.

m0therofdragons · 25/12/2020 15:34

This is why in our family we write wish lists, which mn think are crass but I only see in laws 3 times a year (once in 2020) so if course they don’t know me well enough to randomly pick a gift. I try to go with specific ideas at reasonable prices and a few more vague options. It means I have a gorgeous collection of gifts I truly love. I have allergies to most wash stuff so gift sets are rubbish for me too.

CoRhona · 25/12/2020 15:39

I had money from one set of in-laws and a Radley purse from the other set. I count myself very fortunate Xmas Smile

LadyTiredWinterBottom2 · 25/12/2020 15:40

I've never had one.

Usually DH gets a far superior present than l do from mil. I suppose that's just the way her mind works 🤷‍♀️

UsernameChat · 25/12/2020 15:46

Sorry you got lumped with this. All you can do is smile, say thanks and give it to charity, as you plan.

"Smellies" are the generic gift a number of people seem to give to all women when they don't know what else to buy / can't be arsed putting in any effort. I hate it and would never buy anyone this shite unless the person specifically asked for it. To my ex-MIL's surprised joy, I stopped her son buying her this sort of stuff and told him to put some thought into what she would actually like / use.

phoenixrosehere · 25/12/2020 15:48

I think you and various other poster are being unreasonable to mock B&H and those who gift it as all thoughtless.

I think various posters are taking offence unnecessarily and ignoring OP’s case. She has said numerous times that it is gift sets like this period due to her severe eczema and mentioned this brand because this is the one that was gifted to her. If she had received a different brand, she would have said the same thing about it being a thoughtless gift for her due to her skin condition.

Can’t believe there is an actual class issue over bath gift sets. Some people like them, some people don’t like most smellies.

HackAttack · 25/12/2020 15:59

My granny got me a bayliss and harding set. I'm not a stuck up prick so I was greatful and will use it.

Dartsplayer · 25/12/2020 16:01

I could have written this myself. Severe eczema and psoriasis so can only use prescription stuff on my skin which ILs know and regardless every year I get the token Bayliss & Harding Gift set. I usually regift to someone else throughout the year

TurquoiseDress · 25/12/2020 16:07

Is it because B&H packaging look very similar to Molten Brown but obviously very different quality (IMO)

Shame they gave you a skincare set when you have bad eczema, any brand of set would likely be not appropriate if you're skin is sensitive

TurquoiseDress · 25/12/2020 16:11

*Molton Brown!

KitKatastrophe · 25/12/2020 16:20

@XmasGridlock

I barely brush my hair every day. Smellys, perfume, anything like that is wasted on me. I like books, food and comfy clothes. Why do people insist on buying me stuff that I'll hate. They're supposed to know me and that's the whole point of this. I got a silver and white wall sign from DSIL that said something about 'A house full of glitter'. I hate glitter. Honestly. I'd rather have nothing and people not waste their money.
Maybe next year you could say something in September and agree not to exchange gifts with people like your husband's aunt. We dont bother with gifts from extended relatives as it just ends up costing everyone a lot of money and nobody actually really wants the gifts. Even £5 gifts for all the cousins, aunts, great aunts etc would add up to £50 in our family and in return we would get £50 worth of toiletries, socks and chocolate. There has been much less waste since we just agreed not to bother.
Thisisworsethananticpated · 25/12/2020 16:21

I’d prefer Aesop or Milton brown
But really it’s the waste
Chemical upon chemical upon plastic
It’s ridiculous we pollute the planet to buy stuff no one wants
It totally fucked
OP put in the supermarket food bank
As it’s useful for hand wash and some people really are struggling
Better than charity shop

PearlieQueen · 25/12/2020 16:26

I use it because it's cruelty free and vegan
baylisandharding.com/node/1539/baylis-harding-story/kind-animals

EggnogAndAMincepie · 25/12/2020 16:28

I got loads of Bayliss and Harding stuff. Love the stuff so I was over the moon. Also got bayliss and Harding as presents for other people as well

woodhill · 25/12/2020 16:29

I don't mind the handwash stuff

woodhill · 25/12/2020 16:30

And agree it's good if it's cruelty free. Is it really that bad?

Ginfordinner · 25/12/2020 16:37

Have you actually told them that you can't use these toiletries? If you have eczema you can't expect them to know that you can't use scented toiletries unless you tell them. And then they will continue to buy them ebery year. Or get your husband to spell it out to them..

I had such a good relationship with my late MIL we could actually say to each other "thank you for the lovely whatever it was, but I couldn't use it/eat it, so I thought I would let you know so you don't buy it again". We could tell each other without any drama or upset.

One year I bought her a cheese selection, and there was one cheese she particularly disliked, so she told me. I ate it instead Grin

TheSilentStars · 25/12/2020 16:41

@phoenixrosehere

I think you and various other poster are being unreasonable to mock B&H and those who gift it as all thoughtless.

I think various posters are taking offence unnecessarily and ignoring OP’s case. She has said numerous times that it is gift sets like this period due to her severe eczema and mentioned this brand because this is the one that was gifted to her. If she had received a different brand, she would have said the same thing about it being a thoughtless gift for her due to her skin condition.

Can’t believe there is an actual class issue over bath gift sets. Some people like them, some people don’t like most smellies.

She so wouldn't have slagged it off it had been a different brand. B&H are snobby clickbait for people on here. She'd be just as allergic to Molton Brown, Jo Malone or anything containing SLS but wouldn't have thought to start a thread.
GreenlandTheMovie · 25/12/2020 16:47

I used to get multitudes of these as a child for some reason, or their equivalent. Aged 11- 16, I must have accumulated at least 4 bath sets each year. Its not as if I didn't have interests or hobbies, but bathing endlessly in foam bath was not one of them. It was ... disturbing.

Original poster
XmasGridlock · 25/12/2020 16:50

@TheSilentStars how about you actually read my posts. Hmm Jo Malone, Molton Brown, etc. Never used them. Don't want to. Not interested. No idea what the price difference is between any of these names compared to Baylis and Harding. Also don't even know what SLS is. So, yes, I'd be moaning, regardless of brand, about receiving any type of smelly sets when I have bad eczema.

OP posts:
Lindy2 · 25/12/2020 16:51

I'm perfectly happy to receive a Bayliss and Harding gift set. It's perfectly useable and to be honest I really can't see how anyone can be offended by shower gel or similar.

I bought some of their Lime and Ginger liquid hand soap a couple of months ago for my bathroom. My normal brand choice was out of stock as everyone is obviously getting through gallons of hand soap this year. It smells absolutely amazing. I love it. If anyone has some as a gift they don't want I'd gladly adopt it for you.

TheSilentStars · 25/12/2020 16:56

[quote XmasGridlock]@TheSilentStars how about you actually read my posts. Hmm Jo Malone, Molton Brown, etc. Never used them. Don't want to. Not interested. No idea what the price difference is between any of these names compared to Baylis and Harding. Also don't even know what SLS is. So, yes, I'd be moaning, regardless of brand, about receiving any type of smelly sets when I have bad eczema. [/quote]
I did read. And you're ungrateful.
And SLS (sodium lauryl sulphates) are usually what causes eczema flare-ups in bath products etc.

Tomnooktoldmeto · 25/12/2020 16:59

I really don’t get the hate for Baylis and Harding, I have atopic skin and severe allergic asthma I can’t cope with any other soaps/shower gel/cream as they all make me itch or have asthma attacks

In 20 years (yes really that long) of using their stuff I never have reactions

I’ve tried all the expensive stuff, loccitane, moltonbrown but return each time because it doesn’t affect my health

woodhill · 25/12/2020 17:03

I do understand about your concerns about any products however if you have skin allergies and they need to take it on board

TurningOfTheWheel · 25/12/2020 17:12

Baylis & Harding is awful quality. There are other cheap gift sets that are better quality- Nivea and Dove to name two.