To share or not to share Secret Santa Scratchcard Winnings

[WoolieLiberal]

I was given a National Lottery Scratchcard as a Secret Santa gift. I thought this was a bit naff until I realised it was a winner.

I won a (low end) four figure sum. I got excited and told my colleagues.

Since then, the person who gave it to me sent me a message suggesting (in a lighthearted way) that I might want to give her half. I replied with a laugh emoji as I thought she was joking, but she has since messaged me to ask if I have decided whether I am going to do so or not!

I’ve also been asked by three other colleagues if I could “lend” them “small“ (three Figure) amounts “to help with Christmas”.

DH says I was daft to have told anyone, but it’s done now and is none of anyone else’s business. He says I should treat myself for a Change.

I’m beginning to wish I hadn’t won anything because if I respond to all requests I’ll have virtually nothing left, and if I don’t, then I’ll be thought badly of and stingy.

There’s a woman at work who works part time and is married to a very wealthy businessman (the job is more of a hobby/something to do) and they’re always jetting off on holidays to far flung destinations, having meals out, nice cars and jewellery etc. No one has ever (to my knowledge) asked her to share her wealth.

If I knew a colleague was genuinely struggling I would help but this feels like vultures are circling. DH, DD’s and I are not wealthy by any stretch but “managing”.

Thoughts welcome!!

Did the OP ever come back?

Yes, they posted at 13.25 (possibly in a lunch hour?)

Its yours cheeky fuckers. Ignore them.

Don’t give them a penny for being greedy. If you ask you get nothing. Tell them you used it to buy your Uncle Stuart a new wheelchair and it’ll be life changing for him instead of using his manual chair. And learn to keep your mouth shut in future!

Buy her the same value scratch card back. She gave you “the chance” to win and you are giving her the same. She didn’t give you the winning one. If she knew she it was a winner, she’d have kept it for herself.
Thank you for the wisdom to scratch alone and never tell, if I’m ever given a scratch card as a gift.
I once won £1000 in an office fun day. The cunty boss quickly took it, told head office we had all agreed to share and I got £50 whilst he kept 80 percent for himself. Keep shhhhh. Always.
The End.

Why would you give those cheeky fuckers HALF (or anything for that matter), instead of buying something nice for yourself or your family?

If you really want to do something nice, donate 1k to someone who really is in need & tell the fuckers you helped someone who has no food or shelter.

Why the fuck would you divide it between the team? Buying a scratch card for someone else comes with the risk that they could win, people shouldn't buy them if they can't handle that.
Keep it, all of it and buy yourself something nice.

Tell them you gave it to a charity, it is xmas after all. ( buy yourself a treat first)

Or buy £200 worth of food for your local food bank, and donate it in the name of your workplace. Tell them this. If they grumble they'll look like arseholes.

@itsmeagain76

Or buy £200 worth of food for your local food bank, and donate it in the name of your workplace. Tell them this. If they grumble they'll look like arseholes.

I like this idea.

If I'd gifted someone a scratch card and they won £2k I'd be made up for them. Genuinely glad I'd mAde their Christmas.

I wouldn't dream of asking for half. I can't get over the pure cheek of them!

If they hadn't of asked if of given them £100 and spent £100 on biscuits for the team.

NO WAY should you share it with your workmates, what a bunch of grabby CFs they are!! Keep it & treat yourself. Make a donation to a charity of your choice if you like, but your grabby workmates do not count as charity!!

No, the scratch card was a gift, it’s yours, tell her to fuck off, you don’t owe her anything. If you wanted to get her a small gift that’s fine but her cheekiness in asking for half would put me off doing that.

Anyway how do you know it’s really her who got it if it was supposed to be secret Santa... it’s a bit rude buying someone a scratch card as a secret Santa gift then asking for money off it.

As for the others just say no. If you feel out in the spot say you have already lent it to a family member in need.

@WoolieLiberal

Thanks for the responses. So as not to drip feed and answer as many of the questions:

Sadly I did tell them how much.

It was £2K. (Hopefully that’s not too outing).

The gifter only revealed herself after I’d told everyone about the win (though no-one else has claimed to be the gifter so I’m sure it’s true).

I don’t want to be dishonest with anyone by making up reasons not to give.

I know now I shouldn’t have said anything.

If it is a fake ticket it’s a very good one.

For the moment I’ve told everyone I don’t have the money yet and have had lots of requests to share so I can’t make any promises to anyone.

To make this go away I’m thinking of doing this, which doesn’t involve dishonesty:

Keep half.

Divide the rest equally between the team (including those who asked, those who didn’t ask and the gifter).

I’m hoping that will keep everyone happy (though gifter is hoping for half).

DH thinks even that is daft but has said he respects that it’s my money not his and he respects my right to
Do what I want with it and won’t give me a hard time
Over it as he has not right to.

For gods sake, what is wrong with you???!!

Has everyone shared their gifts in some sort of strange gift cooperative? NO.

If you divide it amongst the team, the giver will STILL be pissed off that she got the same as the others. Nothing will be enough.

And you will look like a total pushover and a wanker, to be taken advantage of at any other time in the future.

It’s not even about growing balls and standing up for yourself. It’s about not agreeing to something that is clearly ridiculous.

I’m so bloody angry that you’re thinking of sharing it! Ridiculous

@Guiltypleasures001

Dh says tell your boss as it's a form of victimisation, so she thought it was a cheap prezzie but it back fired. I think they are utterly taking the piss and it's a group effort from all of them to get your money.

Tell your DH to grow up . There was probably a £5 or £10 limit and she got a £5 or £10 scratch card

Your intent to happily give away half of your own money to a bunch of grasping brass necks is the drippiest thing I've ever read. Why don't you just lie down in front of them at the threshold and ask them to wipe their feet on you for good measure?!

If it were me I would give the person who gifted the card £200 and ignore the other requests. If you give in to one then you set yourself up for a world of hassle. Even if its a loan because not doubt they will try and avoid paying up claiming you only won the money.

Suggest being rather blunt with responses. Something along the lines of "the money is much needed and has already been accounted for". Bloody rude of people to get the begging bowl out but TBF it was very silly to have told them.

The food bank idea is brilliant. I'd do that.

Do NOT give those cf’s half! Would they be giving you half if it was the other way round? I highly doubt it.

If secret Santa had given you a chocolate orange would she have wanted half? No of course not, this is no different.

As others have said just say ‘I have paid off some debts and spent £200 on the food bank’ or words to that effect. Then do the food bank thing but keep the other £1,800 for yourself.

Then look for a new job without money grabbing vultures. They are so wrong and tacky to be asking you .

Are you sure it's not a fake one? Have you actually checked?

In its real then def don't give them anything but donate some on their behalf to a food bank or children's cancer charity.

Out if interest, how many of them shared their gifts with you?

Don't be a mug. It was a gift for YOU. Keep it.
Say you've cleared debt. End of story.

Sorry @WoolieLiberal but you would be an absolute mug to split half the money with everyone from your office. It’s not their money. They don’t deserve it. If you bought the scratch card yourself, or a family member bought it for you, would you feel you had to share it with workmates? I’m guessing not. There is no difference! It’s still money they have no entitlement to.

If you wanted to do something nice for your workmates with the money, get a big takeaway order for everyone one lunchtime. Or some nice cakes. DO NOT hand around your money.

Wow! Lots of strong opinions either way.

I’ve decided that the person I most want to share this with is an elderly relative who was meant to be spending Christmas but will now be alone at Christmas with only a neighbour for company.

I’m going to wait until I’ve got the cash in hand before telling them and then do or get something special for them with some of the money to make up for the spoiled Christmas.

I’m off until 7th January now so I’m setting an out of office on email and won’t be responding to any texts about it (I haven’t had any more from any of them).

I’m not going to mention it again and hope they all get the message that way. My workmates are friendly enough but not close so wouldn’t normally expect nonwork messages from them outside of work time.

If any of them
Ask again I can tell
Them the truth that I have an elderly relative who was having a crap Christmas and needed cheering up!

Order in pizza/takeaway for everyone to share one day and declare you have spent the rest of the money.

That sounds lovely OP

Say you are giving it to charity and if the person who gave it to you will name a charity, you will see they (the charity) gets some.

Then give a small amount to an other charity and the one nominated. This means you have not lied! Keep quiet about the rest.

A very wise decision, OP ... and I hope you have a lovely time with your relative