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AIBU?

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Original poster

Virtue Signalling gone into overdrive tonight!

99 replies

Backtoblack1 · 19/12/2020 22:49

I live in Wales and since the announcement that we will go into total lockdown I cannot believe the amount of ‘good Samaritan’ posts I’ve seen tonight. This one has been copied and pasted on hundreds of profiles:

‘Any of my parent friends, that were waiting until next week to get paid, to do their Christmas shopping for their kids. Give me an inbox and I will do my best .It will be kept private and confidential but please reach out if you need help.

#ifyoucanhelphelp

No parent should have to explain why Santa has not come.’

💙❤💙❤

It’s turning my stomach as some people who post it seem to be itching for some kind of recognition of how saintly they are. Anyone else noticing the same or am I just being mean?

YABU - this is wonderful and we should all adopt the same status

YANBU - this is disingenuous and insincere. They are just glory hunting

OP posts:
gotyerhat · 19/12/2020 22:51

I find it hard to get worked up about it. It's a kind offer, even if their main intention is make themselves look good, they're still doing something kind for others.

Original poster
Backtoblack1 · 19/12/2020 22:54

Are they doing something kind for others though? Or are they just copying what everyone else is going so they don’t look ‘bad’? It’s getting on my nerves but I am due on 🤣

OP posts:
SoupDragon · 19/12/2020 22:54

or am I just being mean?

This.

Iwanttobefreetobeme · 19/12/2020 23:15

Someone call their bluff and tell em you need £300 worth of mega blokz, stat. How many of the people posting it are actually gonna be shelling out I’d love to know !!

CoRhona · 19/12/2020 23:15

Ours have been 'now I have a huge turkey and would like to feed local people'

Halo
ChristmasTreeFairy5000 · 19/12/2020 23:17

I haven't seen anything like this to be fair. But we live close to the border, so everyone is probably just going to leg it over the border tomorrow.

SecretWanker · 19/12/2020 23:19

Oh, I don’t know. I think it comes from a good place but it’s a bit naive.
It like the mental health stuff. It’s Ok to not be ok. I do wonder how they would cope with someone they barely know calling them in crisis.
I can’t think bad. I think people who post this stuff genuinely mean well, but just kind of shrug it off. It may help someone close to them.

LochJessMonster · 19/12/2020 23:21

Those saying they will make and deliver extra Xmas dinners to the vulnerable.
Great idea, contaminated food is a direct route into the body 👌🏻

Enough4me · 19/12/2020 23:32

A simple message of wishing family and friends well and offering chat or help is fine. All the crap about 'reach out' and saving people will put others off coming forwards.

It makes people come across as incapable or victims to be saved rather than a human needing a bit of support during a pandemic.

DontStopThinkingAboutTomorrow · 19/12/2020 23:33

I think it's well intentioned, so I can't get too pissed off at it even though it does annoy me a bit.

Saltn · 19/12/2020 23:40

I hear you OP. Our local page is full of it, including the local postman telling everyone hes working today to help get the backlog. Cue lots of people gushing over him doing a job he is presumably paid for.Hmm

TheTrashBagIsOursCmonTrashBag · 19/12/2020 23:42

Reminds me a bit of the #bekind and copy paste posts after Caroline flack died saying shit like “my door is always open/if you ever feel alone/suicidal don’t top yourself come round mine for a cuppa” or whatever. Usually posted by people who would be the very last ones you’d want to go to when having a crisis like that.

Thegreymethod · 19/12/2020 23:45

I was having this conversation with my friend earlier when someone we both know posted something similar and said I'd love to call their bluff and text them asking them to lend me some money knowing full well they wouldn't and it'd be screenshot and sent around her friends!

Summerdayshaze · 19/12/2020 23:46

Oh god there was this couple offering to drop food off to people and their kitchen was absolutely filthy. I’m talking dogs sitting on the food and chickens running round in shit on the floor. There was another lot offering to take photos of kids standing on a manky old sheet to pretend it was snow.

araiwa · 19/12/2020 23:46

If they're actually doing it and helping others,it's not virtue signalling, they're being nice

NoSquirrels · 19/12/2020 23:48

Apart from the virtue signalling, apart from the fact it’s FB and the message is saccharine, I really do not believe there are lots of parents who waited till the last payday before Christmas to get the kids’ presents. In a pandemic year where rules keep changing and online delivery’s been rammed.

Lots of parents in poverty yes. But it’ll be the food shop that got left til last. Or they’ll have been buying things over months.

No parents leave their DC’s presents till the 23rd to buy them.

LemonSqueezy0 · 19/12/2020 23:50

People I know have posted it, and have had lots of comments saying how wonderful they are... But none of them have admitted that it's copied and pasted, and are happily taking the praise.. and out of about 7 I'd say 2 would actually try to help someone who contacted them. It's a bit pathetic tbh, as Its only posted for likes.

Original poster
Backtoblack1 · 19/12/2020 23:53

On the same village thread, a pregnant poster has asked people if they could go to the shop for her as she has covid and is isolating. She had offered to transfer cash immediately. She is getting the piss ripped out of her and the same good Samaritans are ignoring her request and those who are ridiculing her.

OP posts:
TheTrashBagIsOursCmonTrashBag · 19/12/2020 23:54

@LemonSqueezy0

People I know have posted it, and have had lots of comments saying how wonderful they are... But none of them have admitted that it's copied and pasted, and are happily taking the praise.. and out of about 7 I'd say 2 would actually try to help someone who contacted them. It's a bit pathetic tbh, as Its only posted for likes.
Wales have closed all non essential shops from midnight tonight and I imagine a lot of people got paid on the last Friday before Christmas (so yesterday) so there will be a few people who were planning to get stuff from this weekend onwards for their kids, especially if they’ve had to make their money stretch even more than usual.
BadTimesAtTheElRoyale · 19/12/2020 23:57

I have just posted such a status. Not offering to pay for anyone's shopping but just to let people know I have Amazon Prime should anyone need last minute gifts as so many of my friends live week to week for money. I now feel shit for doing it so thanks for that!

BadTimesAtTheElRoyale · 20/12/2020 00:00

Also I mentioned that I hadn't hit my basket limit for my Tesco order for the 23rd if anyone needed anything. A lot of people don't drive and may not for a number of reasons be able to go to the shops. Does it really matter what people's motives are if they help just one person?

Original poster
Backtoblack1 · 20/12/2020 00:10

“Wales have closed all non essential shops from midnight tonight and I imagine a lot of people got paid on the last Friday before Christmas (so yesterday) so there will be a few people who were planning to get stuff from this weekend onwards for their kids, especially if they’ve had to make their money stretch even more than usual.“

I know this as I live in Wales. I don’t get paid until Wednesday so had left it until then to get some last minute bits. I sincerely doubt anybody was going to do their whole shop in the next few days.

There is a saying that ‘no good deed goes unpunished’ for a reason.

Bad times - sorry if you feel shit. I felt shit reading the same posts over and over and have deleted FB tonight because of it. You may be sincere. My point is, the vast majority are not when it comes to it (as seen by the ridiculing of the pregnant poster).

OP posts:
akerman · 20/12/2020 00:10

There’s so many mean, spiteful posts on Facebook that these sorts of posts restore my faith in humanity a bit. I have a friend who posts this sort of thing. Sh3 has a heart of gold and she is absolutely genuine.

warmandtoasty2day · 20/12/2020 00:12

there are so many reasons why this 'look at me, aren't i wonderful' behaviour gets flamed because so many people make a huge thing of it instead of going about things quietly.

trixiebelden77 · 20/12/2020 00:17

I don’t know. Are you friends with people who are disingenuous and insincere? Why?

I’m not, so I know if people on FB or wherever offer something, they’re not ‘virtue signalling’ (a term used almost exclusively by arseholes, surely), they’re trying to be nice.