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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Relative now going to be alone at Christmas in Tier 4

76 replies

WoolieLiberal · 19/12/2020 20:31

A relative is extremely upset as they are now
Going to be totally alone in Tier 4 on Christmas Day. They were meant to be coming to us and are very upset.

Is there nothing we can do?

OP posts:
ssd · 19/12/2020 20:33

Are they in your bubble?

Philmitchell · 19/12/2020 20:34

Cant people living alone have a social bubble ? I thought they could

TheFormerPorpentinaScamander · 19/12/2020 20:34

If you are their support bubble they can still come to you.

crazyrabbit · 19/12/2020 20:34

Are you also in tier 4? Could you form a support bubble with them? I feel terrible for the elderly and people who line by themselves. It’s hard.

LibrariesGiveUsPower45321 · 19/12/2020 20:35

Can they make a bubble with a local friend?

andawaywego · 19/12/2020 20:35

I initially thought you couldn't bubble, but apparently you can, so a single person can join you just for xmas day.

1Dandelion1 · 19/12/2020 20:38

No, it's horrid news and I'm in the same boat.
I had a few bits saved in the freezer in case I couldn't see my relatives because of track and trace.

LadyTiredWinterBottom2 · 19/12/2020 20:39

You can see your support bubble still but no overnight stays.

ForestNymph · 19/12/2020 20:40

Do it anyway. 🤷🏻‍♀️ I'll probably get slated for saying that but I would in those circumstances. I wouldn't leave someone alone on Christmas if I knew they'd be deeply upset by it.

MeMarmite · 19/12/2020 20:40

My partner (we don't live together) can't come for Christmas now. It's such a sad state of affairs. But we must do our best to limit the spread of the virus, surely?

PinkBuffalo · 19/12/2020 20:41

I am the same, the bubbles we had worked out have not worked out over xmas now boris has announced this
Off to get a few nice bits to have in the fridge tomorrow

Nottherealslimshady · 19/12/2020 21:06

People who live alone can bubble still.

lyralalala · 19/12/2020 21:09

If they live alone they can still bubble with you. It's only the Christmas bubbles that have been scrapped, not the support bubbles for single people

Grenlei · 19/12/2020 21:10

If you're in a support unable you can meet at Christmas and stay overnight. You can leave tier 4 to see your support bubble.

Grenlei · 19/12/2020 21:11

Bubble, not unable, obviously.

1Morewineplease · 19/12/2020 21:13

There will be many elderly folk, my mum included , who cannot bubble with anyone.
My mum is 200 miles away, in a lower Tier to me( I am now in Tier 4) and I'm an only child.
She has no relatives other than me and most of her friends have "gone" or are too frail to visit.

My mum has to accept this. This is the reality for many people this Christmas.

Grenlei · 19/12/2020 21:17

@1morewineplease are you already in a support bubble? If not why could your mum not bubble with you?

UrghThisIsHard · 19/12/2020 21:23

I’m so confused.

I’m alone and in london so tier 4. Usual support bubble has been paused for a while so we could both go to our hometowns for Christmas. For me, that’s Newcastle.

Christmas bubbles aside, this would usually be eligible to be classed as a normal, single-person support bubble. But now there’s the whole new-strain-different-tiers thing...

So am I allowed to drive up there and stay? It’s 6 hours each way so couldn’t do a day round trip.

I thought I knew the answer (hard nope) but I’m seeing stuff on here that’s suggesting otherwise!

nanbread · 19/12/2020 21:28

@UrghThisIsHard sorry but I think no.

No staying over is allowed, only visits on Christmas Day itself.

No travel except for essential.

"If you form a support bubble, it is best if this is with a household who live locally. This will help prevent the virus spreading from an area where more people are infected."

You already had a local support bubble and have not yet formed a bubble with people however many miles away.

I mean legally it's a grey area, but in every other sense it's a hard nope like you say.

Given you already had a local support bubble

BlueJag · 19/12/2020 21:32

People living alone can form a bubble. No need to be alone.

thegreylady · 19/12/2020 21:34

People alone can be in a bubble with one other household. My friend was widowed in November. We are bringing her to us for Christmas Day.

UrghThisIsHard · 19/12/2020 21:39

@nanbread Yeah, I mean I’d say I formed this one a week ago when I put myself into isolation and booked a test for 23rd purely so I could safely drive up to see them on 24th so that’s not strictly correct. And I thought the staying over thing was in relation to Christmas support bubbles which is different...?

Oh well, Christmas alone it is. I don’t have my local support bubble as an option. They’ve already left.

I will say though, support bubbles - while not changeable day to day - do not have to stay static. A lot can happen over the course of year.

nosswith · 19/12/2020 21:39

Not if it means overnight stays.

There is another thing you can do later on- never vote Tory whilst Mr Johnson is leader.

Dragonglass · 19/12/2020 21:41

Even those in support bubbles are not allowed to stay overnight.

From gov.uk:

'You cannot leave home for holidays or stays overnight away from your main home unless permitted by law. This means that holidays in the UK and abroad are not allowed. This includes staying in a second home or caravan, or staying with anyone you do not live with or are in a support bubble with.'

SleepingStandingUp · 19/12/2020 21:42

Tier 4 people aren't meant to leave so it's not as simple as her just driving to you / presume the same works in reverse.

Are there any local charities etc running meals for single / vulnerable people?

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