DH thinks I’m ruining Christmas.

[PunkAssMoFo]

Original plan was Christmas Day at home as I am working in the evening. We were intending on visiting my parents on Boxing Day & ils on 27th. I was a bit worried about this and the risk of exposing my parents, but obviously desperate to see them.

Given Boris’ announcement that’s off. DH has proposed we visit my parents in the morning (2hrs away), his family in the afternoon (2hrs from my parents) & then home (1hour) for me to go to work. I have said no. It’s too much travelling on Christmas Day. I will be too tired to work. Given the increased spread of the virus, it is putting everyone at greater risk.

AIBU?

Thst is a ridiculous amount of travel for one day, covid or no covid! Especially if you then need to work. Bollocks would i be doing that!

Your husband's plan is absurd. YANBU. If he wants to visit his family by himself, he can.

YANBU. Covid-aside, that's a hell of a lot of driving in one day, especially before what I assume is a (night?) at work.

Why doesn't he visit his family while you're at work in the evening?

No way would I be doing 5 hours travelling during the day before a night shift!!

Also I agree with the current Covid rates that going to see both families is a bad idea. I'm not seeing any of my family over Christmas this year, as my parents are bubbled with my very frail Grandma and I just don't want to risk it.

No way, you'll be cream-crackered by the time you even start your shift! He's being selfish, but I completely understand his sadness. Roll on next year!

Yeah it's too much, but I can understand him wanting to see them while you can. God knows what after Christmas has in store for everyone.

If you're worried about the risk to your parents anyway, would you just go and see his parents?

Is he nucking futs? Would he think this was a reasonable suggestion if he were the one then going to work after that full day of travelling and socialising?

I suggest DH learns to face reality. You might really want to ruin Christmas for him by telling him Father Christmas isn't real - it could be overdue.

I understand his sadness too, but everyone else is going through this stuff- he’s not the only one. I think he is being selfish & needs be a bit more responsible. These restrictions are in place for a reason.

You go to see your parents, he goes to see his (as long as you both have transport)

His mum is vulnerable too, they just don’t accept it.

Stay local, tell him this.

And YOU are the one supposed to be going into work straight after that?!

Let me guess, if he was having to work, there would be no question of spending ALL of Christmas Day travelling?

F.U.C.K.O.F.F.

I have told him that we’re not doing it, but i know his family will put him under pressure- especially because technically it’s allowed.

See your parents for an hour or so in the morning, home to chill out for the afternoon, DH goes to inlaws when you go to work.
That's assuming you are in the same tier and it doesn't break rule of 3 households by others seeing them too?

Well the advice for all areas was to stay local and, to me, two hours away is not local!

Go to your parents for a few Hours in the morning then home to nap!

Ask them to come to you instead so you don't need to travel

DPs are tier 3 as are we. ILS are tier 2. Moreover, as much as I would DC’s to see their grandparents, they are still very young and I don’t believe that they should spend Christmas Day in the car. I work in the evening because that’s when they go to bed.

Ridiculous. Do your family really want you to do all of that instead of enjoying a pleasant Christmas Day? They're selfish if they are prepared to let you do that. Crazy. Just stay at home OP.

Yeah let him go while you go to work. See ya later.

No is a complete sentence.

Crazy!! Just stay at stay at home

Having just been looking up the new rules, I think that actually it might not technically be allowed - did I see something about two households only, not three any more?

Yanbu. That's really selfish of him to expect that.