To be upset with friend wearing fur?

[AnnaDarcey]

Hiya,

I reckon most people will say I am being the a hole in this situation. A quick bit about me - I really care about animal welfare. However, I am not at all preachy and never bring it up.

I recognise everyone will make their own decisions regarding the morality of eating meat etc. I cook with meat at least twice a week at my church’s soup kitchen. It doesn’t bother me and I don’t think there is anything innately wrong with eating meat. I do eat meat if I dispatch it myself on a shoot or if I catch it fishing. I just abhor the unnecessary cruelty of factory farming

The other day my best friend since we were in primary school together sent a text asking my opinion about a jacket made out of rabbit fur. Seeing as I have pet rabbits and the coat was from China where there were the most horrific conditions take place, with the animals skinned alive for their fur and then left to die I asked her to reconsider if it was worth it. She said okay.

About an hour ago she sent me a picture of herself wearing the coat, sticking her tongue out with the caption “Wearing your furry friends”. Already upset from an argument with my mother and upset she randomly sent me that photo I called her a sicko and blocked her. It has just occurred to me I have never argued with her and never blocked anyone before.

I am now really upset my best friend did that and a little shocked about how she could possibly be so immoral for the sake of fashion and by trying to upset me to the point I am questioning our entire friendship. I have already been kind of shocked by her morality as she has never bothered adhering to the Covid restrictions she goes to parties; hosts get togethers at her house etc. which annoyed me but I kept my mouth shut. I now think maybe it’s not possible to reconcile our differing moralities. Or am I overthinking it all and AIBTA here?

Just looking for outside thoughts.

Thank you :)

She asked you for your opinion and you shared it. It’s not like you have her an unsolicited opinion. She then responded to that in a deliberately offensive way.

Whatever your opinions on fur, animal cruelty etc that’s enough to question a friendship.

There's a lot of double standards on this thread re: meat and fur,

@LaurieFairyCake

That's awful

There's literally a list of 'badness' (in my opinion only)

1. Fake fur that's not plastic
2. Fake fur that's plastic
3. Vintage fur (preferably really old)
4. 'Ethical' fur - either a by product like leather or animals you've killed really fucking quickly yourself
5. Fur where animals are killed centrally quickly
6. EVIL fur where animals are skinned alive

She's literally done the worst thing possible

Ew, I read that as “animals you have killed by fucking them really quickly yourself”

Regardless of your moral position, any friend who knows someone's views on an issue and then behaves in such a spiteful and obnoxious way is no friend.

I'd struggle to remain friends with someone who was that unpleasant.

CheetasonFajitas

You sick puppy

With s friend like her you don't need enemies.
How horrible of her.
That would be the end of the friendship for me- to deliberately hurt you - taunt you- "......wearing your furry friends..."

How absolutely disgusting.

@Ivy455

There's a lot of double standards on this thread re: meat and fur,

Can you expand on that? I think OP has good standards. She could have lied and said she was vegan.

I have 2 furs (one is vintage and was my nanna's, the other was a charity shop purchase around 20 years ago).

I appreciate that people can have strong feelings about fur and I wouldn't dream of wearing them in the company of friends who I know would be offended by it. But equally, they don't seek to lecture me about the wrongs of fur either and I wouldn't be friends with somebody who did so.

Only you know whether you lecture or not, but I agree with a previous poster in that your friends comment really does fit as a response to preaching.

YANBU for this
About an hour ago she sent me a picture of herself wearing the coat, sticking her tongue out with the caption “Wearing your furry friends”
No need for her to be a twat about it even if she does feel differently to you.

I don’t have an issue with fur used as means of not wasting the animal eg I’m fine with rabbit fur from meat rabbits but farming specifically for fur really does not sit well with me at all.

In any case, I think that sending a photograph of a rabbit fur coat with a caption like that to someone who has pet rabbits, a close friend no less, is really awful, incredibly insensitive and disrespectful.
She must have known you’d be really upset surely?
I would have blocked too