I need a good come back for second hand hating in laws

[IPeedInThePool]

I got some bits for the kids from the charity shop this week just to wear Christmas Day they also had a sock basket 10 for £1 mainly baby socks so just picked some up everything goes in the wash first now in laws are making fun of me for buying second hand and my poor kids mental health they are 3 and 5 for god sake!

A good comeback would be, piss off.

I buy a mix of second hand and brand new for DS. When DS outgrows his clothes, they are mostly in pristine condition, so I resell. So on that basis, I'm always happy to buy second hand and reduce wastage.

That was one I did say it just annoys me so much there is nothing wrong with second hand imho

Who is helping to save the planet?

How do they know where you bought it from? If you don't tell them they won't know so can't mock you.

Ask them to explain what the problem is? Then knock back every reason they have.

@PoppyOppy

How do they know where you bought it from? If you don't tell them they won't know so can't mock you.

This. No one knows where my kids socks are from apart from me.

Even then, it's been a while since I bought some and I'm not 100% certain where it was.

🖕🏻🖕🏻🖕🏻

Yeah how do they know where his clothes are from?

But failing that I’d just talk about saving the environment. They might think you’re mad or whatever but who cares. It’s your baby, you can’t change how they think why bother

How do they know you bought second hand? Just don’t tell them. It’s none of their business.

Tell them THEY are second hand to you... They belonged to dh first now they are your 'dps'!!

TRY as hard as it is, not to react.

If you do want a ''come back'' though I would say ''Were you raised in poverty? It's a common response to having been raised in poverty, don't worry about it, you're ok now''.

Obviously that depends though! My parents over extended themselves with their mortgage and mine and my brother's memory of our childhood is that we were poor but my parents do not see it that way. White washing and revisionism, my parents would take third hand clothes for us. I had to wear dresses that belonged to younger cousins.

There is this ridiculous consumerism we've been constantly marketed at that new is better, shows love buying someone something new etc. The planet is in such a state, everyone having new everything is totally unsustainable. I've bought my DD loads of 2nd hand things, only really DH knows where her stuff is from anyway and sometimes my mum, she often comments on something DD is in being nice and I'll say oh it was part of an ebay bundle but my mum is generally on board with that being fine and cloth nappies etc. People who get judgey i generally just don't tell.

"Well considering the generations before them have completely cocked the planet up with their snide views about re-using, I'm teaching them ow the importance of looking after the planet and not sending perfectly good clothing to landfill"

@elephantoverthehill

Who is helping to save the planet?

People who re-use items. If we all did it and very little went to landfill the impact would be enormous

Where do they want you to shop? Ask and do your research. Gap for instance is owned by Californians but has been involved in sweatshop controversies.
If there is time include a promo in their Christmas presents, e,g. children’s society calendar.

I showed the mil the cute little dress I got, the bag was a banardos and there was socks in the bag she seen.

I only bought DS 2 jumpers between birth and 7.5. The rest were either gifts or other people’s hand me downs (some pristine). He is a very positive adult so doesn’t appear to be too traumatised by the experience!

My mum was a dressmaker and I was always beautifully dressed as a child (think Princess Charlotte). Mum always sent my outgrown dresses to a cousin a year younger than me. Her elder sister has confessed to being very jealous of her sister for this reason. If second hand can inspire such envy, it can’t be too bad!

“I think it’s maybe a class thing, if you grew up working class you’re more likely to be worried about looking poor whereas middle class people don’t have that hang up”

"Piss off" would be my comeback. Stand up for yourself, OP. I honestly can't believe some people on here let their in-laws get away with saying such horrible things. My in-laws tried to make a few little digs at me in the beginning, and they were put straight into their place. They've never done it since.

Stop showing your inlaws clothes etc? Problem solved?

Also, have a look at clothes bundles on eBay if you haven’t already, DS(3) grows extremely fast, he’s a tall boy and never in one size of clothes for longer than 6-9 months. eBay clothing bundles have saved me a fortune over the last couple years (and especially this year!)

Tell them, your children might have a 100 year life expectancy on a planet that's choking on our waste, so if your PILS love the GC's its about bloody time they started playing a part in reducing waste, recycling etc. For their sake.

2Your son was saying the other day how he wished you had bought him clothes from the charity shop, I'm so glad the snobbery ended with you".

I'm always really impressed with the good-quality clothes and toys DIL finds second-hand. Why pay far more for a new one - money that could be spent for more important things like, oh, say, decent food, the mortgage etc. They're not struggling as such but they're not made of money either. And the DC don't mind at all - why should they?

(XH, on the other hand, keeps bringing them round second-hand things that are, how shall we put this, not such good quality. Those tend to find their way either back to the shop or in the bin.)

@IPeedInThePool

I showed the mil the cute little dress I got, the bag was a banardos and there was socks in the bag she seen.

If people say horrible things to you when you show them things, don’t show them things any more.

If they ask why you no longer show them things, tell them.