Spitting blinding RAGE

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I am seriously worried about the level of my PMS rage. I dont get any other symptoms except mildly tender breasts.

Yesterday I saw my cat has worms, also a friend pissed me off. So I was in a pretty bad mood anyway this morning. Got my bike ready, couldn't find my keys (needed them for bike lock). I was full of rage, not anger but actual rage. I was stomping through the house throwing things across the room looking for my keys, I couldn't find them and started sobbing from anger.

Finally found them and set off. All the way to the vets (10 min cycle) my mind was just spiralling into overdrive like a mad woman, I was extrapolating how fucked off I was, it turned into hating my DP, hating my house, basically just chuntering on and on in my head really violently.

Got to the vets and one of my contacts started playing up, so painful and weeping eye. Got the pills came back outside and just felt so angry I kicked my bike hard and hurt my foot. It took everything I had not to pick the bike up and throw it into the road, I'm serious.

Got back home, cat refusing pill even in sardines, butter, cheese, wet food. Carried on being really gentle with her but then as soon as she went back outside (not pilled) completely lost my shit again, fuming at waste of money, crying and feeling rage at everything and everyone.

This kind of thing happens every month, just for one day before my period and it really scares me. It's almost like I literally see red. I hate how it makes my DP feel. How can I get this under control? Does anybody else get this rage?

Just to say I absolutely recognised the type of feelings and behaviour you described, OP! I found it was far worse when I was on the Pill, and also before mindfulness training. I think @Glenthebattleostrich's advice is amazing.

I had the same for years, plus feeling depressed and painful heavy periods.

I finally went to the GP and got a prescription for the pill and antidepressants for before my period. I definitely feel like it's made a difference. X

Vitamins with large doses of iron and vitamin D helped me. My pms rage was so bad that even my dh use to dread it! The difference the vitamins made was huge and I no longer have one day a month where I am completely irrational and full of anger.

I get this and it's awful. The days before my period I am absolutely raging, depressed, self harming through rage and suicidal. I turn into a horrible person. It affects my relationship and my work. I know when it comes so I control myself by saying to myself "it's PMS, you'll regret it, shut up, you'll regret it, shut up" 1000 times a day and do my best not to react even to things that are legitimately upsetting because I can spiral out of control. It's so so exhausting though to do every month and once in a while it doesn't work. It completely disappears 1 day into my period and I feel like myself again. I honestly feel like a different person in those few days before my period, it's an out of body experience. No one can help. Try hormonal contraceptives as they might work. Track exactly which days it happens so you can start recognizing it and self censor, constantly remind yourself it's the PMS.

I have gone back on the pill despite the side effects (constant thrush and no sex drive) because last month's episode almost cost me my relationship, I was honestly psychotic and delusional.

I completely sympathise. I have a very similar time. Although it’s often more of a crescendo, starting a few days before then peaking the day I come on.

A man knocked into me with his shopping basket, quite gently, during this phase last month. I had to immediately abandon my full trolley and go sit in the car, because I wanted to embed said basket in his skull. I ended up crying with sheer fury. Ranting away in my head about fucking awful people were, thinking how I hate everything and everyone. Like many previous posters I lurch from raging to suicidal rapidly.

I haven’t found my GP helpful at all, and I’ve changed GPS several times! For me it’s more managing people around me so I don’t feel guilty.

I do have this in my DHs calendar and I have a reminder in my own which comes up each morning reminding me to not feel the rage.

I hate that at time I can feel I’m out of control and being awful, yet can’t seem to stop myself.

I get it too OP and the Only thing that helps is an intense bout of exercise. See how much better you felt after cycling to the vets?

Do you track it? I used ptracker and found it useful to see reason behind the rage.
I ended having my ovaries out, it changed my life.

[quote CutToChase]@Cheesybiscuits01
But thats what I'm wondering, do you think what I describe is severe or do you think it falls within "normal symptoms" for PMS?[/quote]
I’ve just started meds for PMDD, I definitely had the potential to get as bad as you have described, really noticed my symptoms get worse every month over the past year! I mainly get anxiety but also have the throwing stuff rage which is Not Good.

I’m on sertraline 2 weeks out of 4. Only on my second month now but month one was AMAZING. It was miraculous. It’s an antidepressant but takes a few months to work for depression and it’s not unusual for it to work instantly for PMDD. Weird eh!

Yep, been there, right down to the complete lifting of tension the minute I start to bleed.
Here's what helped me:
Magnesium
B vits
vit D
large dose of evening primrose (2000 a day)
NO alchohol at all for at least 10 days before period
NO white carbs or sugar for a week before, if you can manage. Often in the pre menstrual phase we crave carbs and sugar , but it's the very last thing our body chemistry needs.
Increased exercise. Not yoga or any relaxing malarkey-something like boxercise or zumba, something where you get really sweaty.
Try to get more sleep. When you are about 3 or 4 days prior to period have some really early nights.
Even some of these things should help. You CAN control it it just takes planning.

I have over the last 12 months had the same thing.

I finally saw my doctor and started taking an SSRI (citalopram) for half my cycle (start taking it at ovulation and stop day 1 of my period, the difference is amazing.

I no longer hate my kids and my husband and feel a need to run away from home every month.

Honestly, the sooner you deal with it the happier you will be....go see your GP ASAP.

Good Luck!

I used to exactly the same and my GP prescribed a low dose of Fluoxetine. Honestly, it was a game changer for me and I felt so much better. From, what felt like, 20 days out of each month either crying, screaming or just feeling really angry I went to hardly knowing when my periods were coming because I felt so calm. Before this I was really sceptical about ADs but they were a life saver.

I’ve often wondered how many women, sat in prison, have done their crime while under the influence of PMT 😔

How’s your diet OP? Do you take any vitamins?
Something is off-balance to make your PMS so severe.
Definitely try to sort that first before taking strong medication.

Yep, I used to get this. Hated everyone and everything. Lost my shit so easily. Then followed by a day of crying at everything, adverts, pretty sunset, my kid saying he loved me. I went on the pill, no more period, no more pms, no more psychotic rage. Best thing I did, wish I’d switched to a decent (female) doctor years ago

@TheStoic

Have you actually experienced this yourself or are you just handing out advice?

What you said is so completely unhelpful to someone who month after month becomes an angry, emotional person while expecting themselves to do better.

Every month I would yell at my kids while bawling my eyes out and then afterwards I would feel like such a shit Mum that suicidal thoughts would creep in. I would want to divorce my husband and run away from him and my kids. I would be heavily depressed and struggle to even get out of the house for a walk. Believe it or not, hormones can have a huge impact on people's lives and it is not a choice that we make to be effected by them.

All of this time I would also be expecting myself to do better and feeling embarrassed to walk into the doctors and say what was happening because from an early age I heard things about 'crazy hormonal bitches' and 'women/girls on their rags' being unstable and when it became true for me I expected myself to be strong enough to not let my cycle get the better of me but I wasn't strong enough, I felt like a failure, my own body beat me, and it beat me repeatedly, month after month.

I can tell you that your cheerleading hoo haa would have had me crying my eyes out and beating the crap out of myself even worse when I was at the worst rather than inspiring me.

Words can do more damage than physical things sometimes and you should perhaps choose yours more carefully.

Yes, blood itching in veins is exactly it - go from a great relationship with DP to actively wanting to break up (or worse) once a cycle. Taken years to recognise the pattern, but at least it is only for 24 hours.

Now around that time I exercise a bit more, drink loads of water, avoid caffeine and sugar, and DP now understands what it is so doesn’t take offence if I hide in our room and avoid everyone for those 24 hours. The lessening of guilt around it helps too, so I’m not worrying about what he feels - I just manage it and know it will be over soon.

for everyone who gets this, though. It’s like being possessed and I could really do without it.

OP I went through a couple of years of this when I hit my 40s. It was frightening.
I was an angry parents and a totally reckless driver

Look up PMDD
Doc gave me Prozac

I don’t need it why more (am 46)

I have often wondered how many female suicides are carried out under a PMT fog

Yes like a PP I was going to suggest PMDD. It's starting to become more recognised; I have some knowledge of it tho not through my own experience I am thankful to say.

I will come back and post some links when I have looked them up

I get this, it's got very severe since having my second child a year ago. It can last for up to a whole week before my period starts, I'm irritable, moody, tearful, and the slightest thing sends me into a blind rage, I feel like I could murder someone, can smash things, I get suicidal. It's really bad, I also get bad headaches, bloating, puffy legs, cravings for sugar and carbs. My PMT never used to be as bad before my DD. I have all the symptoms of PMDD. It gets so bad that every month DP threatens to make me leave

@thepeopleversuswork

I used to have this: absolute red mist for a few days before my period, also paranoia, depression and fatigue.

I've been on the Mirena coil for over a decade and its been an absolute life-saver for me: has totally ironed out the hormonal peaks and troughs. It's not for everyone: some people have had reactions to it but its been great for me.

Only thing I would say is that I don't get periods at all now: again this doesn't bother me at all but some people like to have them so they can keep track of their cycle.

But its worth considering.

Oh God yes, the paranoia is terrible! I become convinced I am extra psychic and intuitive - which perhaps I am - but funny how that always translate into being convinced that everyone secretly hates me, is talking about me behind my back or plotting to screw me over. I also have nightmares and fear dreams in the run up to my period. But the circular ruminating coupled with a day of skin-clawing rage is really horrible.

I have a separate round of hell around ovulation where I get brain fog so debilitating I can barely think straight or plan my day, coupled with extreme tiredness. A bit like being pregnant for a day or two. I also have mad blood sugar drops around ovulation and wake up in the night dizzy and have to eat sugar or protein as I feel like I am having a hypo or something.

Bodies are weird. You have my sympathies OP, and yes probably with thinking about the GP as it sounds so debilitating.

I was the same too. I googled about E numbers and I stopped eating and drinking things with certain colours in them. It helped but then I hit perimenopause and it all started up again! So I know take Menopace tablets, which are just vitamins and minerals and god it helps. I see the difference if I don't take them. When I don't I could happily kill someone and I wouldnt give a shit.. Terrible

if its only one day a month, then I think is it possible to track your periods and organise things so you are not on call for any duties or as few as possible for a day or two in advance. I feel like a completely different person some days. Its awful and im awful to be around on those days. I know periods are natural, but some people are truly debilitated by them, and not just with pain, but with their mental health too. If its one day, then hopefully it could be manageable with just staying under the duvet and turning the phone off.

Also if you havent done so., evening primrose oil combined with vitamin b6 and agnus castus

I take the pill for this. The ordinary combined pill, my one is Yaz.

It might be only one day a month but you (I) could do something that has a permanent effect.

It's so refreshing to read these experiences from other women! Usually emotions and PMS only really get talked about in terms of "feeling low" or "irritable" or "weepy". Its good to hear that rage actually seems fairly common.

I'm going to start taking EPO and vitamin B and really plan ahead to get the early night thing sorted in the few days leading up. Plus no alcohol 👀

I got the spot on treatment from the vet, this thing is amazing it does ticks, fleas AND worms so in case anyone reading - that's an option! Had no idea you could get spot on wormer. Had another slight wobble where felt rage flare again when I had settled her into place, parted her fur, and then realised I hadnt snipped the tip off the fucking pipette 👀😁

Just started bleeding now though and it really is incredible how the most suddenly lifts!

I had my bloods done recently and there were no deficiencies or anything wrong at all